Hopeful30 Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 What do you consider low maintenance in a partner, according to your preferences? Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 (edited) a woman who doesn't want you to spend all that money on her... Edited February 23, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of starting post Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 I always thought I was high maintenance because I like the finer things. My husband says I'm low maintenance because I am perfectly happy to go acquire or arrange them for myself & I do not sit around waiting for some sugar daddy to spoil me by getting me things I can't afford on my own. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 Isn't the kind to do drama. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Garcon1986 Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 I'm with basil and the Dalmatian dog d0nnivain. Someone who says my way or the highway is pretty high maintenance - I will let most things slide, like the choice of clothes, vacation location choices, or the choice of paint in the house. A serious discussion like whether to send the kids to church, or what political views they should have - I would insist on a mind to mind. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 low maintenance is when she doesn't have to order the most expensive thing on the menu every time you go out to eat Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 To me, it's someone who, on their own initiative, takes cares of those things in their power and under their purview. We all need help and support at times, but when and how much is the difference between high and low maintenance... Mr. Lucky 2 Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 To me low is basically easy to get along with, common sense, not too much b@tching and complaining or constant drama, There's always stuff and she can be as complicated as she likes l'm pretty complicated myself and far from perfect either . But some stuff in any relationship it's only natural , when she's just an everyday basically highly strung pain in the ass, always something type though, she's high. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Kitty Tantrum Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 My ex-husband was high maintenance because he got bored easily and wanted to do all sorts of fun/new/exciting things... but he wanted ME to facilitate everything for him. From never feeding him leftovers, to being the only one to ever plan dates and outings, to coming up with money to feed his tech addiction, to finding other women for him to sleep with. It was all on me. He also constantly needed validation and reassurance (yeah buddy, maybe if you tried doing ANYTHING for yourself for a change, you might not feel like such a waste of oxygen). My ex-boyfriend was emotionally high-maintenance (by my standards) because we were in a long-distance relationship but he liked to be in communication all the time. I was pretty in love with him (and he had a personality that was good for getting me to come out of my shell a bit - INTJ/ENFP for those of you interested in personality typing) so it took a while, but after a couple of years of that I was feeling pretty burnt out on talking and opening up and being out of my shell without him actually physically there with me. He also wanted me to sleep with other dudes and send him pictures, which sounded fun and novel at first but ended up being exhausting and awful. My fiance now is super low-maintenance. He takes care of himself and his needs. There are things we need from each other, but I never feel like I have to scramble to keep up with the relationship and make him happy. And I don't have to talk very much with him. He went out of state to visit family for a couple months a while back, and I think we spoke on the phone no more than once a week while he was gone, and things were great when he got home. He also doesn't have any weird fetishes that he wants me to cater to. LIFE is still hard work, but the relationship itself and maintaining his level of happiness and contentment is not. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Never walking on eggshells: low maintenance Always walking on eggshells: high maintenance Takes less than an hour to shower and get ready to go out: low maintenance Takes 2+ hours, tans every week, nails every week, frequent salon/waxing/plastic surgery: high maintenance Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 A guy who had to have every new electronic version that came out or was always wanting a boat or a new car would be high maintenance and waste too much money, even if he has money. A guy who expected me to do most of the housework would be too high maintenance or who didn't pick up after himself which creates more work. A guy who rarely wanted to go out to eat would be too high maintenance. That's a lot of work and boredom. If I was a guy, I wouldn't want someone I shared money with having mani/pedis regularly at all. It's too easy to do yourself. Maybe have a special one for a special occasion and do them yourself, which is super cheap and super easy. Or don't do them if you don't need to. That's a chunk of cash for something that it costs $5 a month if you do it yourself. High maintenance is someone who is overly emotional. Like I don't see how guys stand these women who are always crying and upset about something. Or men who are always jealous or upset about something. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
littleblackheart Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) High maintenance = insecure and emotionally unstable, to me. Low maintenance = secure and emotionally stable. Edited February 24, 2019 by littleblackheart 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful30 Posted February 24, 2019 Author Share Posted February 24, 2019 I disagree with some posters about the money aspect. I think of you can afford it, there is nothing wrong with outsourcing personal maintenance once in a while (a wax, a pedicure, etc). I got my first pedicure this year just yesterday. I feel much more lady like than before when I attempted to do it myself lol I hope a man doesnt think im too high maintenance if my feet also look a little dressed up lol My ex boyfriends all seemed to love it. They even wanted to pay for it. When I asked why, they said because they want to take care of me (I thought it was sweet lol) Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) I agree....I don't think that a woman(or man) who takes care of themselves or indulges in finer things is automatically considered high maintenance.. Id say most of the guys that offered to pay and saying "they wanted to take care of you" is probably BS...See how many of those guys would feel the same if you were sick and they had to pay your medical bills.. They want you to look good for them..Guys often pay for boob jobs, not so much to boost their wives/gf self esteem , but more because they prefer women with bigger tits.. Bottom line is that if the other person makes you feel uneasy, and you never feel comfortable, or they are seemingly impossible to please no matter what you do, then they are high maintenance.. TFY Edited February 24, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 It's not about the maintenance /outsourcing. If you can afford it fine. Next month I'm going to a black tie red carpet event in NYC & I will pay close to $250 to have my hair styled. . .not cut just styled (& that is cheap for NYC ). High maintenance would be if I did that every day for work. It's about the people who lose their minds & can't go out in public if they haven't undergone all that every week, whether they can afford it or not. If you are eating ramen noodles, maybe you don't need $75 per week gels every week. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful30 Posted February 24, 2019 Author Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) <snip>They want you to look good for them..Guys often pay for boob jobs, not so much to boost their wives/gf self esteem , but more because they prefer women with bigger tits..<snip> Its sad you underestimate men so much. I always looked good and paid for my own maintenance, so i dont think they offered to promote it because it was going to happen anyways. Edited February 24, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Truncate quote Link to post Share on other sites
Curiousroxy86 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Incompatibility is high maintenance. Causes too much friction it becomes too much to be happy or peaceful in the relationship. Not agreeing on whatever is important to one or both causes major conflict/arguments Low maintenance is the ability to be agreeable and peaceful in the relationship whether there are differences or not. More compatibility less confrontation. It's not considered high maintenance if the person doesn't mind doing what it takes to maintain the relationship (hence why some say regular pedis are high maintenance and others say don't mind) Examples (only applies if the lifestyle differences is important to the other) If one person is drama and the other person don't like drama One person believed in God and push their views the other person is atheist/agnostic One person is frugal the other likes to spend One person is in great debt the other is responsible One person is messy the other values cleanliness One person has conservative views the other liberal One person has racist tendencies the other don't see race or abhor racism One person has very different sexual needs then the other 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Curiousroxy86 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Its sad you underestimate men so much. I always looked good and paid for my own maintenance, so i dont think they offered to promote it because it was going to happen anyways. Women who value something and don't make excuses for it...men will tend to consign or don't mind it even if they don't see the point in it That's the beauty of like bias Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 haha Curiousroxy86, how about we add this: one is a man and one is a woman 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) I disagree with some posters about the money aspect. I think of you can afford it, there is nothing wrong with outsourcing personal maintenance once in a while (a wax, a pedicure, etc).<snip> I agree about if you can afford it, but like everyone in my office gets them and they're all making about $10 an hour and can't even afford lunch. That's crazy. And I know someone who gets them who claims they can't afford community college for their kid. I personally hate manis because I can do it in a fraction of the time it takes them. Edited February 24, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Truncate quote 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful30 Posted February 24, 2019 Author Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) Incompatibility is high maintenance. Causes too much friction it becomes too much to be happy or peaceful in the relationship. Not agreeing on whatever is important to one or both causes major conflict/arguments <snip> Then why are very beautiful women stigmatized as high maintenance just by their looks? People accuse attractive women as being high maintenance but if maintenance means needs, then its affair to assume that someone less attractive isn't high maintenance just because they dont "look" needy... Edited February 24, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Truncate quote 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Someone who's easygoing, considerate, and values my autonomy. No whinging if I skip a few days of shaving or if I need to travel for work for a few weeks. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CantGetEnuff Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 If a woman is higher maintenance than I am, she is high maintenance. If she is lower maintenance, she is low maintenance. I am the equilibrium of maintenance and all should seek to emulate me. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Then why are very beautiful women stigmatized as high maintenance just by their looks? People accuse attractive women as being high maintenance but if maintenance means needs, then its affair to assume that someone less attractive isn't high maintenance just because they dont "look" needy... the majority of women I've dated who were beautiful were also high maintenance. One girl would take 2 hours to just put on makeup and do her hair. One girl only liked going to fancy restaurants so that she could be "seen" One girl told me she only sleeps with men who make six figures or more 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Shining One Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 A guy who rarely wanted to go out to eat would be too high maintenance.Can you explain the thought process behind this one? I don't like to eat out that often because I generally prefer my own cooking. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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