illi Posted March 13, 2019 Share Posted March 13, 2019 hi guys, this is illi and i need some advices. i have a LDR for 3 years. we met online. i'm his first serious relationship and i'm gonna be honest; i showed him the pure love. he had no family and friends love until i show him.. in the meantime he did bad things. for example flirting ex girlfriend or lying to me what he is doing at that time -at a bar, drinking etc- well we had a broke up. when we broke up he slept prostitutes and made out his couple female friends 3 months after this broke up i met someone in my town. lets call him P. we had a connection, i feel so free with him having fun and meaningful times. but he afraid to fall in love and have a heart break. so, P run away. 1 month after all this things my LDR and i got back together. we are so close, never like this before. we wanna get married, i wanna see the world with him.. he ALWAYS be my everything. this is why i forgave him.. he is my weakness. but, i cheated on him talking with P. well P ready to commitment but he said you need to make a choice.. and i know it should not be on the table. i don't know what is happening. i'm in love with my LDR and i know i can't live without him. i will die for him. but a piece of my heart loves P.. does he worth? i have no damn idea. just don't know what to do i feel guilty i feel sad i feel weird.. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted March 13, 2019 Share Posted March 13, 2019 (edited) in the meantime he did bad things. when we broke up he slept prostitutes and made out his couple female friends my LDR and i got back together. we are so close, never like this before. we wanna get married, i wanna see the world with him.. he ALWAYS be my everything. this is why i forgave him.. he is my weakness. i'm in love with my LDR and i know i can't live without him. i will die for him... Whoa! He slept with prostitutes and other women when you were broken up - full stop! WHY WHY WHY did you get back with him... and, please don’t say that you LOVE this guy and he is your weakness... that’s just silly. You have the ability to make a choice, it’s not like you can’t control what kind of behavior you chose to tolerate and who you invite into your life. I’m sorry, you sound very young and perhaps this is your first relationship. You are not going to like what I have to say... but, you should NEVER invest this heavily in any one person/one relationship. You CAN live without him, and you SHOULD live without him. You need to learn how to be strong on your own. He is not your weakness. A mature and wise woman would say - “No way, I may have cared for you at one point but this kind of behavior is unacceptable in the person I choose to be my life partner and we are done.” To be very honest, I would end it with both men. One, because he lacks self control, good judgment, and appropriate boundaries. And with P, because he lacks the maturity to be in a relationship right now. Edited March 13, 2019 by BaileyB Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted March 13, 2019 Share Posted March 13, 2019 (edited) Your first everything love doesn't mean they are your best love. Tho love can make us make choices for the wrong reasons, I think you should choose with your head, not your heart. I agree you should dump both, and find better. Just my perspective: I find that you are easily manipulated by men, and are too trusting, so you are being taken advantage of. Edited March 13, 2019 by smackie9 Link to post Share on other sites
Nilfiry Posted March 13, 2019 Share Posted March 13, 2019 Well...to answer the topic question, yes you can love more than one person. in the meantime he did bad things. for example flirting ex girlfriend or lying to me what he is doing at that time -at a bar, drinking etc- Well, if he lied to you once, he will do it again, and this being an LDR means you have no way to verify anything he says to you. You best not let yourself get too committed to anything until you have spent more time in person with the guy, such as actually living together. Dating someone and actually being with that person is two different worlds. Link to post Share on other sites
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