Angry Men?

[Sunnydaysandsome]

So I am not a fan of online dating at all. One of the reasons is I had a bad experience on there but another reason is the amount of angry men online.

 

Is it just me or do men (obviously not all) seem angry at women these days?

 

I didn't respond to one message when I did it last (OLD) and got 'where were you between 4-9pm' type message. I said 'making pancakes' and then it was 'what all this time?'... Obviously I blocked him.

 

Then I got the 'send me a sexy pic' request of another man and when I said no he used the f word back at me. I blocked him.

 

Then there were several sad men who send messages like 'women won't date me' and 'I need a woman to sort my life out'... Very unattractive.

 

Yes I know you get all sorts and this was a free site but still I would say that 80% were like that on there.

 

Don't get me wrong I know women who send nasty and unnecessary messages to men. I was always polite.

 

What a sorry state of affairs!

[Garcon1986]

I have found equally as many women who literally write on dating sites, "Must be marijuana friendly", "don't waste my time", "I'm not racist but I don't outside my race", "I'm tired of all the sleazy men" - piles and piles of negativity. I agree that you've met some immature men, but I would encourage you not to become too extremist =p Don't let it make you become an Orc fighting the Elfs

[Sunnydaysandsome]

Yes I totally agree those women, I know one like that. She was all 'no losers' on her profile yet she lied about her age.

 

Yes it isn't just angry men, there are angry women on there too.... it is just I don't read their profiles and get messages from them!

[Gretchen12]

Your post is about people online being angry at the opposite sex. It's not a post intended to bash men and start a gender war, which is itself related to people being angry at the opposite sex.

And yes, people who have had bad dating experiences do carry that baggage and negativity. Some of that go way back to childhood issues and later being rejected throughout adolescence. That all turn into anger. Online dating, a lot of weird behaviors.

[nospam99]

I'm male. So the profiles I read are written by women. I don't see angry or desperate from the ladies. BUT ... so many that seem phony to me. 'If I had a nickle for every ...' I'd be up to $50 by now.

 

Prime offenders in the nickle pile:

- wants to travel. Okay. I'm 65. I vary the age limits on my searches but rarely go lower than 54 or higher than 67. I understand women in that age range are new empty nesters and want to travel to have fun. But, sorry ladies, I can take or leave travel. What I'm looking for is a relationship. So write about what you're looking for in a man, not what you could just as well do with a female friend or alone.

- likes to laugh. Puleeeeze. WTF does that have to do with why you're on a dating site? If you leave that out, am I to assume that instead you like to weep for sadness?

- and finally, a typical quote from the profile of a woman I recently sent a (so far unread) message to:

 

''I am looking to meet a special man who wants to get to know me, someone who is kind, affectionate, considerate, understanding and loving. Tell me what you think!''

 

Really? Is that it? Not handsome as Brad Pitt, younger than you, making six figures, 8-10 inches taller than you are? Women who write that they're looking for 'motherhood and apple pie' type love and leave out any mention of physical or financial criteria are just baiting and switching. Unless you're a 'couch potato', at least make sure you list activities you do or would enjoy.

 

So, as is often said here on LS, it's a numbers game.

[bathtub-row]

I experienced the angry man thing on dating sites a lot, which is why I will have nothing to do with them. A lot of the men on there are horrible - they’re aggressive and demanding. At first, I just thought it was a rare thing but it kept happening over and over. I haven’t been on a dating site in years now because of that. Then there were the men with idiotic profile names or writing suggestive comments in their bio. I just wonder how they could be so clueless. Anyway, I tried those sites a few times and gave up. It as truly depressing. I’m happy to meet guys the old fashioned way or just stay single.

[BluEyeL]

I'm male. So the profiles I read are written by women. I don't see angry or desperate from the ladies. BUT ... so many that seem phony to me. 'If I had a nickle for every ...' I'd be up to $50 by now.

 

Prime offenders in the nickle pile:<snip>

 

You sound angry lol

 

Sorry but nothing wrong with the examples you gave, you just seem angry at women for being “phony” and not admitting they want a hot guy with money

Edited March 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Wallysbears]

People do not write well I’ve found. Not on dating sites, not resumes. They just don’t know how to say who they are or what they are looking for.

 

Ignore any guys who are rude. Block them.

[standtall]

Your post is about people online being angry at the opposite sex. It's not a post intended to bash men and start a gender war, which is itself related to people being angry at the opposite sex.

And yes, people who have had bad dating experiences do carry that baggage and negativity. Some of that go way back to childhood issues and later being rejected throughout adolescence. That all turn into anger. Online dating, a lot of weird behaviors.

 

Gretchen...are you a mind reader? It is very clear by her use of the words that she meant men, and not just the opposite sex. Perhaps you are trying to soften her thread, which is nice, but it was a gender war from the first sentence.

 

As far as anger and duplicity in people that you meet or interact with online? I think that both genders suffer from this and one of the problem about anger is that it is hard to impart tone in writing. To convey tone requires a lot more writing than most people are willing to do nowadays.

[elaine567]

I'm male.

Prime offenders in the nickle pile:<snip>

 

Woman of a certain age have probably spent years with a guy who doesn't want to go anywhere, whilst she dreams of foreign shores, he would not recognise a joke if he fell over it and he could never be described as " kind, affectionate, considerate, understanding and loving"...

I don't see anything wrong with wanting something different.

Edited March 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[CantGetEnuff]

I can't speak to male profiles and communications on dating sites, BUT...

 

From looking on Twitter these past few years, there are a TON of disillusioned dudes who are mad at the world (and yes, mad at women) and who make ridiculous demands of others to cater to their whims.

 

I view them as man children who will bitch about a super hero movie having women in it. I can't imagine how infantile they are when it comes to dating. I feel sorry for the single ladies out there who have their acts together. You deserve better.

[ElKay]

Both men and women can get angry at the dating world and it flows through their interactions or what they write on a dating site.

 

One guy messaged me while I was online, but doing something else on another tab at that time. Then, he basically wrote a "Oh, I guess you're one of those then." message, to which I said that I was away from the page and blocked him as I didn't want to deal with that kind of attitude if I moved forward and dated him.

[elaine567]

Men, in general, learn that by getting angry they tend to get what they want in this world.

I guess for some men on OLD getting angry and snarky works, the woman apologises, she makes nice noises, he gets his own way, and she agrees to go on a date.

 

The ones that block him were not his kind of a woman anyway...

[CantGetEnuff]

I can only imagine how many more messages women get than do men on those sorts of sites.

 

From the guy's view, maybe he sent two messages and he gets annoyed that neither woman responded.

 

But from the woman's view, if she's getting dozens of messages, and if she can't possibly respond to them all, then I guess she is only going to chose a select (the most creative, interesting, specific messages I'd guess) to respond do, and ignore the rest?

 

I don't know this for a fact but several of the women I used to talk to told me about abusive site members who would just send such angry messages if they didn't get an immediate response...like they were entitled to one instead of having to earn a response with a well thought out, eye-catching message instead of standard "hey i'm Josh, how r u?"

[Prudence V]

 

Is it just me or do men (obviously not all) seem angry at women these days?

 

 

It’s not just OLD. On FB, Twitter, even boring old IG.... Women post something, women respond, interesting back and forth discussion flows. Along comes man, makes a snarky comment. Women ignore, and continue their discussion. Man feels upset that they haven’t dropped everything to pay attention to him, and starts getting really nasty. I’ve seen it so often.

 

Luckily it’s not all men, and luckily it’s only a certain type of man (single, entitled, usually fairly right-wing with pretty archaic ideas about gender roles, etc) <- probably incel. But they are legion. And they make online spaces unattractive.

[Mr.Me]

I got curious one time and made some fake profile as a women for a science project. No replied received were replied back too and no profiles were kept after 2 hours.

 

 

 

The first with no picture still got a few replies.

 

The second with a picture got about a 100 in a few hours.

 

The third was a very very attractive women and got 500 in 2 hours.

 

 

 

I did the same thing as a man.

The first got none.

The second got 1

The third got 10 in 2 hours

 

 

I surmised from this there are lots more guys looking for women than men.

Or at least brave enough to reply.

 

Of the replies from men to the women most were vile, disgusting, rude, shameless and generally just demanding and ********* like.

 

"I'm horny"

"I need a women to suck..."

"It's been a while for me. come over and fix it"

 

"I just wanna eat P####"

 

"send nudes"

"call/text me"

"Can I pretty please f### you just once?"

 

 

 

The others were basically "hey". Not really much for conversation starters.

 

 

The last few were:

 

"I'm all alone"

"I can't find a girl"

"I can't get laid"

"No one loves me"

"NO will ever love me"

 

 

I wouldn't answer any of those either and if that were my only choices for replies I'd just run from all that!

 

 

 

From the Man Profile with a well written and attractive profile all the replies were along the same lines.

"hey, you sound amazing, Are you married? Kids? Are you even real?

 

 

 

So it seems to me that any women that seems nice, sweet and polite and worth meeting is scared off by the knuckle dragging men and generally make women scared and grossed out.

 

 

Seems if a person is too have any luck with OLD it's takes knowing how to weed out the mouth breathing knuckle dragging men and the women looking for cash in exchange for 15minute dates.

 

 

 

I'll pass and stay single.

[preraph]

I can't speak to male profiles and communications on dating sites, BUT...

 

From looking on Twitter these past few years, there are a TON of disillusioned dudes who are mad at the world (and yes, mad at women) and who make ridiculous demands of others to cater to their whims.

 

I view them as man children who will bitch about a super hero movie having women in it. I can't imagine how infantile they are when it comes to dating. I feel sorry for the single ladies out there who have their acts together. You deserve better.

 

I think the internet has simply given inadequate types a voice who wouldn't have had much of a presence in the real world. Let's face it, some men and women want unreasonable things and feel entitled to them and get ugly like a toddler when they can't just order it up and have it delivered to them. It's a generational thing but not limited to one generation. It's a whole cluster of problems, internet anonymity, raised spoiled being rewarded for everything for little or no effort, being told you're special when you're not even meeting the bar for average. Then there's media influences going way back making it look like everyone should be able to get an 11, when they don't even exist outside of graphics manipulation. The ones who aren't really out in the real world think that is the real world. And where's mine?

 

John Douglas wrote about some serial killers who were so socially awkward that they didn't even want the victim to see them and so they would knock them out from behind, some of whom were so inadequate that they couldn't fulfill their psychosexual desires with a woman who was even alive. This is the ugly picture that comes to my mind when I read on here about some of these bitter entitled guys who lash out on the internet revealing their real messed up thoughts from the safety of their rooms.

[preraph]

In the early days of OLD, I was moderating a site for people who choose not to have kids, and even back then, a lot of the women were complaining that even though they put something to the effect of "No men with children or who want children," men just ignored this. Why? Because the men don't care if they want them or not at that point. They were just wanting sex. So to them, what she wants is irrelevant. Used to really infuriate those women. Then they'd either ignore or tell them not interested and get really nasty responses back. So it's been going on for years and years.

[chillii]

lt all goes both ways.

There's 3 or 4 posts through LS just this week alone from women all mad at the men for all the same stuff.

1 just today saying how she want's to rip into them she's so sick of it.

And as far as men oh l'm horny, well hello, what no one read the 50 posts by women a week round here dating bc they're horny too? Why you think they even keep bothering or half of them resorting to some fwb thing.

There's a few in here of that stuff just today alone as well.

l dunno , shame all these dating people can't all just be locked up in the one big building together and somewhere in there would be their perfect match :bunny: