Logo Posted March 27, 2019 Share Posted March 27, 2019 (edited) I mostly write here because I like reading others’ opinions and reading about their experiences or their insights. When a person you’re romantically interested in shares with you many personal stories, it builds a bond, it humanizes her or him faster than you can blink. You feel connected, closer. I’m finding it hard to understand what made a recent experience so searing. What basic, bare minimum ingredients does a relationship need to sustain itself and for the couple involved to prosper? Can a relationship be established and be based mostly on casual conversation that simply feels natural, not forced, physical closeness and mutual interests? Or what if the other person’s presence is comforting. Is that enough? For example, we like being physically together — I’m not referring to sex — it relieves both our feelings of loneliness and gives us comfort. We’re comfortable enough to talk about a lot of different topics. Is that sustainable? Is that enough to weather the storm that are the negatives that haunt that experience, some, but not all of which can be resolved? Edited March 27, 2019 by Logo Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 27, 2019 Share Posted March 27, 2019 When I have somebody in my life that shares deeply personal things with me early, I feel uncomfortable. It makes me wonder why these folks have no filters or appropriate boundaries. I don't feel closer to them at all & there is no bond because it makes my walls come up. IMO the best way to build a strong bond is gradually over time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted March 27, 2019 Share Posted March 27, 2019 mutual physical attraction build a bond much faster than the stuff you mentioned above Link to post Share on other sites
Author Logo Posted March 28, 2019 Author Share Posted March 28, 2019 It makes me wonder why these folks have no filters or appropriate boundaries. I don't feel closer to them at all & there is no bond because it makes my walls come up. For argument's sake, personal and societal boundaries differ from person to person and from region to region. Who's to say that one is more "normal" than the other? Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted March 28, 2019 Share Posted March 28, 2019 Very ture. But on the thread , personally nope l wouldn't consider that stuff enough in an actual relationship long term or marriage. But mind you , there's probably plenty of long marriages that basically mainly just have some of those things . lf we end up single older , sometimes l think for many , that might just be enough . Link to post Share on other sites
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