Why do so many single men not like to travel?

[Kitty Tantrum]

I beg to differ. The enjoyment I've experienced before, during AND after a trip is very similar to the enjoyment that I get from a new piece of tech. H and I still reminisce about trips that we took many years ago, but most of the tech that we bought that long ago have already been rendered obsolete and discarded.

 

 

I don't think it's a competition - I think things and experiences both have value and it's good to have both as far as possible.

 

Right, but we're not judging the absolute or relative value of things or experiences compared to each other (which, btw, I see tech as a hobby, specifically, as being pretty comparable to travel in terms of ROI), we're exploring the tendency of men and women to value these things differently, in a subjective way, based on the various prevailing social and psychological differences between genders.

 

Personal anecdotes aside (I'm a woman, and I have no interest in travel beyond what's necessary to close the distance between loved ones), I do think there is a difference between the way most women value one-off experiences (such as travel), compared to most men.

[Garcon1986]

Single men don't travel because you've not met the Garcon

[LuckyM]

I don't think this generalizations holds, but maybe it is true in your area. Maybe just on the groups you have selected.

The best way to know is to ask the companies that sponsor these outings. (They may exagerrate the truth.)

 

Men tend to be more independent when they go on outings, not into organized sponsored trips.

[Els]

Right, but we're not judging the absolute or relative value of things or experiences compared to each other (which, btw, I see tech as a hobby, specifically, as being pretty comparable to travel in terms of ROI), we're exploring the tendency of men and women to value these things differently, in a subjective way, based on the various prevailing social and psychological differences between genders.

 

 

I agree. I was responding to your post where you stated that buying things was better value than buying experiences. There are certainly differences between genders, but my point is that one is not necessarily any better than the other.

[Els]

Also, I never really understood where the trope of "everyone who enjoys traveling is an underemployed bum spending above their means" comes from. My experience has actually been the opposite - most of the people I know who enjoy travelling have good jobs and plenty of disposable income to spare. In fact, every trip H and I have been on has been partially tied to work - whenever one of us has to travel for work, we'll tag a personal trip on to the itinerary, at half the cost. I don't imagine that people who are paying full price for flight tickets and working a minimum wage job would be able to get very far.

[chillii]

Men would be way less inclined to be going in some group thing too , especially if it's nearly all women.

Great on one hand but really he won't wanna be just hanging out with women.

And the type of stuff women choose wouldn't interest most men as much either , they'd likely choose totally different things, and travel in totally different ways and different types of places , especially if they're single.

 

Just for me personally too , the money thing would be big from a guys point of view too. It's a lot of money to blow on something he'll have nothing for , really. l'd be thinking of the toys l could buy with that money , or stuff l could do to the house.

[Gretchen12]

Is it because when you travel, you sometimes need to ask for directions?

[major_merrick]

As others have rightly said, it often comes down to durable goods vs. transient experiences. Put me in the durable goods camp. I like to build my pile of stuff - including fast cars and shiny things that go bang. I'd much prefer that to a trip somewhere. Vacations aren't cheap - we're usually talking thousands of dollars. Last I checked, money doesn't grow on trees. You don't get to a net worth of hundreds of thousands of dollars (and no debt) by taking vacations. I owned a very nice house and a couple of good cars free and clear by the time I was 30. A lot of that came from working, building value, and staying home.

Refresh my memory - how deep in debt is the average Millennial?

Edited March 30, 2019 by major_merrick

[snowcones]

Single men don't travel because you've not met the Garcon

 

 

Hello there

[snowcones]

Is it because when you travel, you sometimes need to ask for directions?

 

 

Lol That's it!

 

 

I think some people just have more wanderlust than others.

Edited March 30, 2019 by snowcones

[thefooloftheyear]

I can't even barely bring myself to use a strange bathroom, let alone sleep in a strange bed that was slept in by God knows who and did God knows what in there...I don't care if Mr Clean just finished in there before I arrived..It never sat too well with me..

 

Additionally it's just one of those things that a lot of men differ on when compared to women...There are women in my circle that actually travel together with their female friends and leave the guys home...They post up pics on FB of themselves on some guided boat ride and viewing fancy beachfront properties....(Yawn)....They (guys)want no part of it...

 

I traveled a lot over the course of my life and its always the same for me...the thrill wears off after about 24-36 hours.. Particularly if there isn't really any activities of interest to me...Just fart around and eat, drink and go to shops with a bunch of junk? No thanks...That wears off pretty quickly..

 

I think also as guys start to reach middle age and older, they just want some peace and their normal routine...The thought of whooping it up and letting their hair down like a lot of female contemporaries do, just bores the shyt out of most guys at this point in life...Most will tell you that they have more enjoyment watching a bunch of football or some other sports, scratching their nuts and hanging around the house, or working on some project in the garage than traveling for the sake of going someplace..

 

TFY

Edited March 30, 2019 by thefooloftheyear

[eleanorrigby]

I adore travel, it's my most favorite thing to do.

My husband wouldn't go anywhere if not for me.

I'm not getting anywhere my travel fix and I'm ready to start farming that need out to my children and see if they want to start going places with me.

 

I'd spend money on travel over things any day of the week.

[Highndry]

I absolutely hate planes and the entire airport "process." My goal is to never fly again in life. I will travel by vehicle or boat, but "around the world" sort of stuff just does not appeal to me.

[nospam99]

One single man here who doesn't like to travel:

 

1) Nothing special to travel for: There's a two-headed monster on Sesame Street. The two heads argue: the mountains or the shore. I'm a 'mountain guy'. I've got my mountains where I live. I've also got history, culture, architecture, and other nature where I live. I don't count a 'day trip' as 'travel'.

 

2) The overhead of travel: I haven't been on a plane since before 9/11. Even back then I HATED it: waiting in f--king airports, chasing the baggage, small seats, engine noise, sitting for hours. Now with the intrusive security s--t, NO WAY. In theory, there are plenty of places I'd love to see: Grand Canyon, South Seas (I'm a scuba diver), Paris, London, Rome, Jerusalem, Scottish Highlands. But when I think about the time, money, and bulls--t to get there and back, fagetaboutit.

 

Maybe I am lucky where I live. And some of these 'trips' require overnight accommodations. But without getting on a plane, I have the Whites, Greens, Berkshires, Adirondacks, Catskills, Poconos, Alleghenies, Appalachians, Cape Cod, Long Island Sound, the Jersey Shore, the Finger Lakes, Delaware Water Gap, Lake George, Niagara Falls, Boston, Newport, New York, Atlantic City, Philadelphia, Washington, Gettysburg, Cooperstown, Pennsylvania Dutch country, and dozens of less well known venues that I hesitate to mention because I'd hate for them to be ruined by larger crowds. Travel is where you find it.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

I haven't been on a plane since before 9/11.

 

Wow!

 

I also hate flying, but I do like to travel. But I can't afford it. I have 3 trips planned this year and only one includes flying, and my mom paid for it because I'm going with her. And even that will be a working vacation for me.

[Timshel]

I can't even barely bring myself to use a strange bathroom, let alone sleep in a strange bed that was slept in by God knows who and did God knows what in there...I don't care if Mr Clean just finished in there before I arrived..It never sat too well with me..

TFY

 

 

I really get this.

[SolG]

Also, I never really understood where the trope of "everyone who enjoys traveling is an underemployed bum spending above their means" comes from. My experience has actually been the opposite - most of the people I know who enjoy travelling have good jobs and plenty of disposable income to spare. In fact, every trip H and I have been on has been partially tied to work - whenever one of us has to travel for work, we'll tag a personal trip on to the itinerary, at half the cost. I don't imagine that people who are paying full price for flight tickets and working a minimum wage job would be able to get very far.

 

Yeah I don't get it either. I make a relatively good living and actually find it can be cheaper when travelling - especially in Asia - than being at home! If timed well airfares are economical. And things like food and entertainment cost a pittance. I've definitely come home from OS way under budget - many times. Travel is very much in the realm of disposal income for me and has no impact on my wealth building at all.

 

Oh, and I've never done group travel or tours. Too restrictive for my taste.

 

And must admit I don't really class most work trips as 'travelling'. My experience is normally transit to loc... work your butt off... transit home. My last OS work trip involved two weeks away with one day off. And that's generally been my experience. The company doesn't foot business class fares so I can be a tourist! In fact they specifically pay for business class fares so I can hit the ground running... and not stop.

 

As others have rightly said, it often comes down to durable goods vs. transient experiences. Put me in the durable goods camp. I like to build my pile of stuff - including fast cars and shiny things that go bang. I'd much prefer that to a trip somewhere. Vacations aren't cheap - we're usually talking thousands of dollars. Last I checked, money doesn't grow on trees. You don't get to a net worth of hundreds of thousands of dollars (and no debt) by taking vacations. I owned a very nice house and a couple of good cars free and clear by the time I was 30. A lot of that came from working, building value, and staying home.

Refresh my memory - how deep in debt is the average Millennial?

 

It doesn't have to be an either/or. My daughter is in her 20s. Has no debt, healthy savings and assets, and travels. She's far more money-wise than I was at her age. I didn't buy my first house until I was 29 - she's way ahead of me.

 

Her fiance shares her perspective as a seasoned and enthusiastic traveller, and investor, himself. In fact, I'm more concerned about her penchant for Louis Vuitton and brunches than travelling. That, I just don't understand! I could seriously travel for a month for the cost of what she's paid for one handbag. Apparently there's an amazing resale value... which really means nothing if you never plan on selling.

 

Anyhoo.. to each their own. We all pay for what we value.

 

Which brings me back to the OP's assertion about single men travelling more than single women. I just haven't experienced that phenomenon where I live.

[Els]

Yeah I don't get it either. I make a relatively good living and actually find it can be cheaper when travelling - especially in Asia - than being at home! If timed well airfares are economical. And things like food and entertainment cost a pittance. I've definitely come home from OS way under budget - many times. Travel is very much in the realm of disposal income for me and has no impact on my wealth building at all.

 

Oh, and I've never done group travel or tours. Too restrictive for my taste.

 

Definitely. The only times I've ever done a "tour" was when it was required to get into the place I wanted to go to.

 

To be honest, most of my memorable experiences with travel wasn't seeing the landmarks or the things. It was the entire "experience" - sure, the buildings and scenery is nice... but it's also about the culture, the food, just wandering down side streets, people-watching, seeing how the locals live. I find that I learn a lot about a place just from going grocery shopping and dining with the locals!

 

And must admit I don't really class most work trips as 'travelling'. My experience is normally transit to loc... work your butt off... transit home. My last OS work trip involved two weeks away with one day off. And that's generally been my experience. The company doesn't foot business class fares so I can be a tourist! In fact they specifically pay for business class fares so I can hit the ground running... and not stop.

Oh, there's definitely no traveling done during the actual work portion of the trip - that takes up 8-10 hrs on a good day! But H and I are both allowed to tag "personal travel" on to our work travel, as long as we pay for the extra days ourselves. So if one of us is traveling to a nice place for work, we'll buy a plane ticket for the other person, and extend our stay.

 

(My job only sponsors economy class fares though, haha. No business class fares! I guess there are tradeoffs for everything...)

 

I absolutely hate planes and the entire airport "process." My goal is to never fly again in life. I will travel by vehicle or boat, but "around the world" sort of stuff just does not appeal to me.

 

I hate airports and hate planes too - actually, I think you'll be hard-pressed to find someone who likes airports, lol. The checking in, security, queues, waiting to board, and then the turbulence... ugh. I'd much rather take a 12-hr train ride (as long as it's a nice train, like in Western Europe) than a 1-hr plane ride, and have done so quite a few times.

 

I guess I just see flying as a necessary evil where the benefits exceed the downside. Some people do genuinely like flying (albeit still not airports), and I envy them. I spend most of the flight reminding myself why I'm doing it.

[Blind-Sided]

..................

 

Men tend to entertain themselves more - they have more hobbies. Most of these involve actively doing something or achieving something, because this is how guys tend to be wired. It may be achieving something fairly pointless and of no real value to the world (caught a big fish, finished a round of golf under par, beat a new video game), or it may just be watching someone else do the same (going to a hockey match) but it's an achievement nonetheless, and that gives it value to the participant.

 

Travelling on the other hand, doesn't really feel like an achievement. It's an experience. You just consume it. Less achievement, therefore less motivation. Most guys enjoy travelling when they do it - which is typically with a partner - but otherwise they just have little motivation driving them to do it.

 

 

 

Exactly.

 

 

Also, if you have a job were you travel... then the last thing you want to do is get on another plane. In my younger years... I would travel, but for a reason. I would go to camp, or hunt... or ride off-road. To me, traveling just to see a city isn't fun. AND, since I grew up in a tourist attraction (OC, SoCal) it was hard for me to think about travel to see something similar to what was in my own backyard.

Edited April 1, 2019 by Blind-Sided

[Els]

 

Also, if you have a job were you travel... then the last thing you want to do is get on another plane. In my younger years... I would travel, but for a reason. I would go to camp, or hunt... or ride off-road. To me, traveling just to see a city isn't fun. AND, since I grew up in a tourist attraction (OC, SoCal) it was hard for me to think about travel to see something similar to what was in my own backyard.

 

 

I completely respect your preference, but... why on earth would you think that all cities look similar to Orange County? Having been to SoCal (we spent most of our time in LA and SD, but a couple of days in OC), I assure you that it looks (and functions!) very, very differently to London, or Zurich, or Prague, or Singapore, or Hong Kong. And that's not even getting into the more "exotic" cities...

[losangelena]

I love how this is supposed to be a thread about why single men aren’t interested in travel, and yet half the posts are about how bad/irresponsible/selfish/debt-ridden women are who deign to spend money on a vacation.

 

SMDH. Y’all don’t even try to hide your hate.

[notbroken]

I am a man and I still like to travel. Yes, I've 'blown' hundreds of thousands of dollars travelling. No regrets at all about that and I wouldn't trade my experiences for a better 401K or more expensive house at all. While some might not like it I find more enjoyment scuba diving in Cozumel way more fun than tending to an even bigger house.

 

I enjoy going places both as a couple and alone. I've been to MANY places around the world and have taken countless trips by myself. Both alone and as a couple have their pluses and minuses.

 

That said, I don't consider going with a group as 'single travel'. At all. There is no way I'm going anywhere with a bunch of people I don't know well. I like to do my own thing when travelling 'single'. Single travel is just that - by myself. I suspect that is why such groups don't have many men. Group travel just doesn't appeal to single travelling men. I don't need a group to 'keep me safe' and always manage to have plenty of fun when travelling alone.

[Els]

I love how this is supposed to be a thread about why single men aren’t interested in travel, and yet half the posts are about how bad/irresponsible/selfish/debt-ridden women are who deign to spend money on a vacation.

 

SMDH. Y’all don’t even try to hide your hate.

 

I know, right?!?

 

It puzzles me why people who are supposedly "not interested" in something feel the need to make multiple posts in a thread about it bashing the people who ARE interested in it. Like, why???

 

I mean, if I saw a thread asking "why do women not like extreme car racing?" or something, I might post once saying that it just doesn't appeal to me or I'm not a fan of the risk or such. But I wouldn't dream of answering with "well men are all so selfish that they want to put other peoples' lives in danger and then they complain when no woman wants them, why would any woman want a horrible man like a racer yadda yadda".... I don't think that enjoying a particular hobby is a valid reason to bitch about an entire demographic, no? I think it's great that people have different hobbies, because those other people would then be paying to race instead of everyone buying lots of plane tickets and driving the demand and thus the price up. Win-win all around. So why be so ANGRY at those people?

 

I'm not a psychologist, but I strongly suspect that there's something deeper going on here, lol.

 

That said, I don't consider going with a group as 'single travel'. At all. There is no way I'm going anywhere with a bunch of people I don't know well. I like to do my own thing when travelling 'single'. Single travel is just that - by myself. I suspect that is why such groups don't have many men. Group travel just doesn't appeal to single travelling men. I don't need a group to 'keep me safe' and always manage to have plenty of fun when travelling alone.

 

I feel the same way about group travel. I might take a local trip with friends just for the social aspect, but most certainly not an overseas trip. It's extremely important to me to be able to create the kind of itinerary that I want, instead of having to compromise with 10 other people.

 

I do enjoy traveling with H (partly because he's happy to lean back and let me choose the itinerary! ), but I also enjoy solo travel on the rare occasion that I'm going somewhere for work and he's unable to follow. I'll still extend my stay for a few days and see the place. There ARE a few places that I wouldn't go alone as a solo female, unfortunately. I think males are more privileged in this aspect - there is less risk for them when they travel alone.

[snowboy91]

It's been very interesting reading this thread, especially for all the reasons people don't like to travel, whether it be for a sense of comfort, saving money or having preferred hobbies, etc. I feel there's an interesting cultural thing I'm seeing here.

 

As a counter example to the original question, I am a guy. And I absolutely love to travel. Not single though, but if I was I'd be able to travel a lot more. I first left the country on my 16th birthday on an exchange program to Europe, and have had the travel bug ever since. I was lucky enough to be sent to a conference in the US last year, and go to Europe again in the same year.

 

To me, travel is one of the most fulfilling things I can do. It's about looking at new landscapes, trying new food, meeting new people and understanding different ways of life. Even just going to a backpackers (and I've done so in my own country!) allows you to meet people from around the world. Many say it's a fleeting experience and thus wasteful, but I find it gives me a different outlook on life which lasts a lifetime. In addition, I've always been very much in the "work to live" camp - what is the point of making lots of money if you can't use it on the things you enjoy? Sure for some, it's a nice car, or a bigger house, but for me it's to fund my adventures, wherever they may be. If I'm time poor the travel is within the country.

 

As to why more women travel than men? I haven't found that to be the case at all. Most places I meet fellow travelers are about a 50:50 mix (although I haven't really kept track of that).

[Sunlight72]

Why dont straight single men like to travel? I'm just trying to understand.

I do. But not in groups. I've traveled fairly extensively as a single man - Europe and North America. I've probably traveled 1/3 as much with a girlfriend, though I have always wanted to travel with a woman I love. I'm a guy, it's easy. I just get on a plane and upon landing I cruise around. Trains, buses, walking, motorcycle, local 'taxi' alternatives and 'bus' alternatives depending on the country.

 

A group sounds like a drag to me, for several reasons. It's more expensive than if I plan it myself, it will go places I don't care about, slowly, with a bunch of Americans who block me from meeting any locals because they all speak English and want Air Conditioning and McDonald's hamburgers (In France! At Versailles! I am not kidding, and I couldn't decide if I should have laughed or cried.).

 

To me that experience is better had by staying home and watching a travel show on TV. When I travel, I want to explore and I want to change my itinerary on a whim if I meet some friendly person/people, or hear about a cool event or place just around the corner or happening that evening. Groups don't do that, so I just do it myself.