YamiPenguin Posted April 1, 2019 Share Posted April 1, 2019 (edited) Hello, everyone! This is my second time posting on here, with the first time being at the start of this year when my ex broke things off with me. To summarize our whole relationship to the best of my ability, we loved each other very much. We had our ups and downs, but we managed to stay together for 2.5 years with plans of marrying each other someday. We were our first love for each other. So, I really think it was amazing that we were able to stay together for 2.5 years, especially for our first relationship. However, towards the end of it, things started to get shaky, and so she broke things off with me. We have been broken up for almost a year now. And, we've been in strict NC for 8 weeks. During those 8 weeks, I have started to become the person who I was at the beginning of the relationship (happy, proud/content of who I am, etc). However, a few days ago, I made the big mistake of stumbling onto my ex's social media page (I did not contact her). And what I saw tore me apart, as if I went all the way back to square 1 (day 1) of NC. On her page, I read that she has started to regret our whole relationship and wish that she had never "opened up to me". She said that I was incapable of loving her like a "man". However, I know for a fact that I did loved her. Why else were we together for almost 3 years? I know that I did love her (and still do), so it sucks that it seems like she's trying to rewrite our whole history of us being together. You are free to scold me for checking out her social media page during NC, because I know that it was a big mistake of mine. However, after I did so, there are now so many questions on my mind. Did she ever love me? Why is it that she's now regretting our whole relationship? Almost one whole year since we last together and 8 weeks into NC? It doesn't really make sense to me. Yes, I know, these are pointless questions to ask... And honestly, I'm not sure what I'm getting out of this from asking, but I hope some of you can shine some light on this and help put me back on my tracks of NC. Edited April 1, 2019 by YamiPenguin Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 1, 2019 Share Posted April 1, 2019 Just as you have had ways to deal with the breakup, so does she. It's a shame she is being public about those ways and yes, she may be taking a jab at you. People will tell themselves all kinds of things to get through something like a breakup. Of course, you both once loved each other. She knows that. She is just still bitter. Don't you join her in being bitter. It hurts no one but the person who's bitter. It's a shame she's doing this on social media, classless, frankly, but people's tempers get the better of them and you may take solace in the fact that she may have only turned to social media at the point her real friends and family tired of her ranting or told her she was also to blame. So don't let it bother you too much and stay off her social media and move right on into a better life. Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted April 1, 2019 Share Posted April 1, 2019 this is not just on you, it takes 2, you were not so suited as you first hoped, look elsewhere Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted April 1, 2019 Share Posted April 1, 2019 This might be a silly question, but are you sure she was talking about you with that post? Is there any chance she's been dating someone since your break-up that you didn't know about, and she's actually directing that post towards him? Link to post Share on other sites
Author YamiPenguin Posted April 1, 2019 Author Share Posted April 1, 2019 (edited) This might be a silly question, but are you sure she was talking about you with that post? Is there any chance she's been dating someone since your break-up that you didn't know about, and she's actually directing that post towards him? That's not a silly question at all, as I was asking myself the same thing when I stumbled upon her page. Could they be about me, some other guy, her friend/parents? Who knows, and it shouldn't matter, right? I don't really like to over-think about things like this as it doesn't really enhance my progress of healing. However, based on mutual friends, it seems like she has not dated anyone since we broke up. Edited April 1, 2019 by YamiPenguin Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted April 1, 2019 Share Posted April 1, 2019 Posting the comment publicly is very immature, so is having that reaction to a 2 1/2 year relationship (unless it was abusive in some way). She's just lashing out, childishly. Don't let it mess with your own sense of your history. Link to post Share on other sites
healing light Posted April 1, 2019 Share Posted April 1, 2019 I don't respect people who bash others on social media--I think it looks immature and classless. It will also strike others reading it as odd since the relationship formally ended a year ago. I know it's easier said than done, but try not to let this get to your head. She is obviously trying to come to grips with the ending of the relationship; if she wasn't still processing it and rationalizing what happened, etc. she would not care enough to splash it all over social media. Those who know you will eventually realize the truth, and the ones who don't aren't worth your time. Link to post Share on other sites
emeraldgreen Posted April 1, 2019 Share Posted April 1, 2019 Quit calling actively checking up "stumbling". You went looking for trouble and you found it. Let past stuff go and put energy into yourself. What other people think about you is not your business. Link to post Share on other sites
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