I think I made myself sound insensitive (I think)

[ShiningMoon]

Hi all,

 

I didn't know where to post this, so here goes.

 

I will not be diving into the details of the history, but basically, there is colleague I normally really enjoy chatting with.

 

Anyway, he normally calls me fairly often but never right away at 9.00.

 

Today, he chose to call me at 9.00 which was a bit unexpected, but anyway. I had been off for the past 4 days and had a horrific weekend. I was in a good mood when I showed up to work however. I'm always quite chippy/cheerful when we speak regardless.

 

Anyway, I asked him "how are you". He paused and said: "Yeah, I'm OK", but he didn't elaborate. He asked me a question about a case. I didn't think much of it. I tried to crack a joke or two, but he didn't really laugh. He seemed down. I didn't want to ask what was wrong with him, since I assumed he probably didn't want people to know his business especially over the phone. We chatted a bit about my departure from the company and then we hung up.

 

Then, my boss contacted me to tell me a former colleague of ours passed away. The man who passed away was such a good spirit, it's unbelievable. I put two and two together and realized this is why my colleague was down. I just wasn't aware of our former colleague's passing.

 

It made me look quite insensitive, but my colleague could have told me over the phone too. After all, I knew the person who passed away. I'm very embarrassed. I feel as though I sounded insensitive, but I just didn't know about our colleague's passing when he called.

 

Do you reckon I may have come across as insensitive?

 

Thanks.

[Mr.Me]

Why are you beating up yourself over something you had no idea about?

 

I'd say I think you are being oversensitive, but toward yourself...