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What does my guy friend mean

Lolo54

By Lolo54,
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preraph

preraph

Posted
Posted

Too late. He's a hurty kind of guy and that's why you should run. Clingy and way too insecure and mental. This isn't how anyone should react to not getting a text right back! I think you should tell him no to being friends or anything, or just ghost him since the damage is already done and he did it to himself.

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whichwayisup

whichwayisup

Posted
Posted
But what am I meant to say I dont want to hurt him

 

Are you interested in him?

 

tell him that you left your phone at home and he needs to not freak out and assume the worst if he doesn't hear from you right away. People have lives and sometimes it's nice to not have a phone with you.

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GorillaTheater

GorillaTheater

Posted
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I did disappear for 6 hours

 

Jesus. It's a phone, not a leash. Constant contact is waaaaaaaay overrated.

 

I think he acted like a complete nutjob and you'd be justified in not speaking to him again, but if you are interested in him, follow pregraph's advice. And hopefully this guy won't drive you too crazy with his neediness.

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The Outlaw

The Outlaw

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It's time to re-evaluate things. You're in a relationship, and he knows it. Since he's a friend, he should at least respect that. Sending you that text when you are in a relationship is something that just shouldn't happen. If he can't understand that, it's time to move on from him. Just my two cents.

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preraph

preraph

Posted
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^ Outlaw, if my squirrels take pictures, I am in big trouble, especially if they learn to deliver a blackmail note.

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mark clemson

mark clemson

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Think hurting his feelings might be EXACTLY what you need to do.

 

There are, unfortunately, messed up people out there who need to be beaten off with a stick. I think you've found one, sorry to say.

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preraph

preraph

Posted
Posted (edited)
I'm not interested in that way but I don't want to hurt my friends feelings

 

Security specialist Gaven deBecker: People who can't say no attract people who won't let go.

 

Preraph: And people who won't let go are a problem. Say no. He knows he's off the rails. Think about it, if he's so crazy he doesn't even know what he said in this circumstance was out of bounds, then why would you want to molly coddle him? You don't have to do anything. You should just ghost him and let him keep being crazy until he gets help.

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Scarlett.O'hara

Scarlett.O'hara

Posted
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I'm not interested in that way but I don't want to hurt my friends feelings

 

He is banking on that. What he is doing is a type of emotional blackmail to make you feel responsible for his feelings. He has crossed a line into something terribly inappropriate. You are being tested.

 

The best thing you can do is to tell him you cannot be friends with him anymore, then block his number. Otherwise, there is the potential for him to become obsessed with you and become even more demanding and jealous.

 

Trust me, you don't want to let this get out of hand. I recommend that you do some research online to see how other women have tried to be kind to a man acting this way with disastrous consequences.

 

For your own sake, you really need to consider putting a stop to this now and set some strong boundaries with your male friends heading forward.

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dispatch3d

dispatch3d

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I don't see how this is a test. He got invested in her and more or less confessed his feelings. You should back away to not hurt his feelings worse.

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anika99

anika99

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I'm not interested in that way but I don't want to hurt my friends feelings

 

So how many of your other friends freaked out because you left your phone at home. Did your family leave you crazy long winded messages like that? I'm guessing this guy is the only one who sent you creepy messages just because you were unavailable for a few hours.

 

And on top of everything you're in a relationship and he knows it? I'll tell you what. If my boyfriend recieved a message like that from a female "friend" I'd be telling him to get rid of her asap

 

This guy's insecurity is not your problem or your fault. His message was creepy and manipulative. You only met him a few weeks ago. Get rid of him.

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El An

El An

Posted
Posted (edited)

I would suggest you tell him to get help and if he refuses, cut off contact right there. If he's not willing to go through the steps to get better, then he's going to be very toxic to deal with and it'll extremely draining for you to deal with. His refusal to get help (and I won't be surprised if he does other stuff similar to this in the future) is not beneficial for you or for him.

 

Some people develop an unhealthy infatuation because they found someone that was willing to listen to them and they take that as believing that the friend is 'the one'. But bear in mind not everyone is like this so take that with a grain of salt.

 

Also you have a partner and if your guy friend is saying that without caring about your relationship, what does that imply about his future actions? Is he going to keep writing these things with no regard for aspects of your life?

Edited by El An
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brokenblade

brokenblade

Posted
Posted
I have a new guy friend that I have been talking to for a few weeks and I had to go out and left my phone at home he then sent me this after I didn't reply

https://m.imgur.com/CT9iz31

Thanks for any replies

 

I think he might've gotten too attached too quickly and... yeah, run.

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