TheRainbow Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 We are doing well. We are getting along, and we just celebrated our eleventh anniversary. Our newborn daughter is almost four months old, and she is doing so well. But there has been one (of many) issues that seems to keep being brought up, and it bothers me. It was brought up again that I'm a social path and have a personality disorder. My therapist says I have some signs that could point to having a personality disorder, but I'd have to talk to a psychiatrist to get a diagnosis because she is not qualified too. So I've seen a psychiatrist a few times in the past year. Once to get on antidepressants, and again to have my medication doses increased. It has been helping with my postpartum depression. But I had discussed with her about me having a personality or other mental health issues. I spent a good while with her, and she doesn't think I classify for any particular disorder. She diagnosed me as having depression and anxiety stemming from low self-esteem. But on the other hand, I've been told I'm a sociopath, a psychopath, and narcissist. Surely it isn't anyone I know (with the exception of my sister in law) but people online mostly who say what I have written, and what my husband has written would instantly peg me for one of those. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 've been told I'm a sociopath, a psychopath, and narcissist. Why would others think that? You seem caring and are a great mother. You have real emotions, not faked. Can you give an example of two as to why others may think that about you? I doubt you are, even if an unqualified shrink has said you could be. Link to post Share on other sites
Cornputer Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 People online will diagnose you with anything as many, for some reason, think they are qualified to do that. Listen to your psychiatrist who IS a professional and has actually met you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TheRainbow Posted April 17, 2019 Author Share Posted April 17, 2019 More people then I'd like or really both my husband and I'd like to know about my infidelity. I've been accused by in real life people as being cold and calculating. Also when I look back to my first few months on this site, and I was cold. I was uncaring, selfish, and I can't believe some of the stuff I said. The blame I put on my husband. He still stuck by me. When I bring this up to him, he says that I can't change how I acted in the past, just how I act, feel, and react in the future. He says a trained professional said I didn't have a personality disorder, so I should accept it. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 People online not qualified to make diagnoses. I regularly see all kind of suggestions which make no sense with what information they've been given. Link to post Share on other sites
divegrl Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 Other people’s judgements about you is a reflection of them, and not your value and self worth. Believe that you are whole and complete. A radiant light and beautiful being. Please be careful on the antidepressants. Tapering off these medications can be quite hard. Have a beautiful day my friend! Link to post Share on other sites
Dandelioness Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 A true narcissist would never question themselves, let alone seek professional advice about having a personality disorder. They truly think they're perfect and do no wrong, and are often the "victims" instead. The fact that you questioned yourself automatically takes NPD off your list of possibilities LOL Im currently learning about sociopathic behaviours so I can't comment further. If you're getting this from people online, be careful. There's a lot of shady people out there. I also find that people who label others like that are often, subconsciously, talking about themselves. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TheRainbow Posted April 17, 2019 Author Share Posted April 17, 2019 Other people’s judgements about you is a reflection of them, and not your value and self worth. Believe that you are whole and complete. A radiant light and beautiful being. Please be careful on the antidepressants. Tapering off these medications can be quite hard. Have a beautiful day my friend! I weaned off antidepressents once before. But right now, I need them. My family especially my kids deserve a functioning mother. And thanks for the kind words. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 TheRainbow, Your husband is correct that who you were in the past is not who you are today. There is no need to let the old stuff define you for the rest of your life. You can know within yourself that you have changed, because now you can clearly see the old negative, non-constructive and destructive attitudes, patterns, behaviours, words and actions... ...and it is also clear in your mind how deleterious these are, to your husband and other people in your life. It honestly doesn't sound like you are going to be able to make the same mistakes again...and that's how you know that you've completely grown out of it. There are people who, for their own selfish or cruel reasons, will want to keep you stuck in that old matrix forever, and will keep trying to project it onto you including by openly accusing you of still being like that...you don't have to take on any of that for yourself once you know within yourself that you are not going to make the same mistakes again. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 More people then I'd like or really both my husband and I'd like to know about my infidelity. I've been accused by in real life people as being cold and calculating. Also when I look back to my first few months on this site, and I was cold. I was uncaring, selfish, and I can't believe some of the stuff I said. The blame I put on my husband. He still stuck by me. When I bring this up to him, he says that I can't change how I acted in the past, just how I act, feel, and react in the future. He says a trained professional said I didn't have a personality disorder, so I should accept it. Just because at times you may be cold or calculating doesn't mean you have a personality disorder. And a true N or sociopath wouldn't even care what anybody thought let alone worry if they were one or not. You're being way too hard on yourself R. Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 Diagnosis is hard and when it's formal, e.g. for admission into a mental hospital, is a specialty within MH as your therapist pointed out. Agree that that generally diagnoses from online strangers are worth only some consideration, and often not even that. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 each shrink will give you a different diagnosis and put you on different medications. find a shrink that will give you a diagnosis you like and medications you can live with Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 Just be sure you're being open and honest with your psychiatrist and following directions to the T. Don't ever increase or decrease dosage without approval of the doctor. If you're being open and honest and the psychiatrist has tested you, which is necessary to diagose you, then just go by what he/she says. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted April 17, 2019 Share Posted April 17, 2019 I highly doubt you're any of those things. You've been selfish, but you are trying to change. I don't think narcissists think there is anything about themselves that even needs to change. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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