dislike my wifes job

[BaileyB]

Well...gee...It wasn't like a career or anything and I was making 300+/night in the 80's when people with regular jobs were making that in take home pay for a weeks work,..

 

And it just so happens that I was working my way through completing university at that time with one of the most difficult undergrad majors you could ever choose...(Bio/pre-med)...

 

Well, you didn’t say that. What you said made you sound a little bit like a... fool (pun intended;))

[Timshel]

When people get sick or hurt, they need help. God bless the people who help.

Thank you to the people who are there when being there matters.

[snowcones]

No one's mentioned that it's against the code of ethics for medical professionals to get involved with their patients and in some cases they can get fired. There is more chance of a medical professional to get involved with one of their coworkers, than with a patient. Now THAT you should be worried about!

[chillii]

Insecure guys are a huge turn-off. I would be losing desire by the day if my husband couldn't deal with a situation like this.

 

 

Call it whatever you like but l'd really have to wonder come to think of it ,as a few have said , how you or other women would deal with it vise verse.

My ex w had a few male nurse and carer friends , never really asked how their gf's or wives felt.

But a few have said right here they wouldn't like it one bit.

So are they insecure women too ?

l think they're normal or in fact OP here too.

lt did take me a long time to get use to it back when myself .

l'd say it'd bother most people but in time you hear all the crap they go through and see all the other parts of the job or as in my ex nursing in general and realize the incredible work they do.

But still if they work working with younger good looking patients in men or women , l think any partner male or female would have some trouble with it . I saw nurses giggling and carrying on plenty of times over some patients,nurses do great work , but they aren't innocent .

Edited April 19, 2019 by chillii

[basil67]

Maybe its different out there, I dunno...that's just the way it is out here for the regular folk...

 

Yes, it is different here. Our government pays for in home care for those who require it.

[basil67]

But still if they work working with younger good looking patients in men or women , l think any partner male or female would have some trouble with it . I saw nurses giggling and carrying on plenty of times over some patients,nurses do great work , but they aren't innocent .

 

I wouldn't have an issue with it.

[chillii]

When people get sick or hurt, they need help. God bless the people who help.

Thank you to the people who are there when being there matters.

 

 

Yeah exactly , and you see this was the other side of the coin l saw so much of. And l honestly couldn't do some of things they have to do either, but yaknow, thank God they do.

[thefooloftheyear]

I wouldn't have an issue with it.

 

To be fair, though, you are very far off the spectrum of what "normal" women do and their behavior ...

 

Not that it's a bad thing btw, its a very desirable trait...

 

TFY

[Timshel]

Ok, maybe there shouldn't be any male nurses.

Holy monkey nuts, is this all men think about? That's a rhetorical question.

It's settled then, straight dudes caring for an incapacitated female (no matter age) will sexualize (yep I made up the word) the situation.

Good to know, scary and really fing sad.

 

 

Op, as I wrote in an earlier post, the reason your wife thinks you are off for asking about her work is that she does not have a porn running in her head while she takes care of her patients.

 

That's just you.

[JuneL]

Before reading this thread, I didn’t know so many people have such a fetish for incapacitated patients

[Timshel]

When the crap hits the fan, you do what comes naturally.

 

So OP hasn't been around but I would guess that this relationship isn't compatible, since OP is under the assumption that seeing a dick is novel and porntastic for his wife.

 

 

 

Divorce her dude when you are bothered enough to make a thread about how life hurts when your wife takes care of sick people.

 

 

If you do not trust her that is the root of the problem.

[eleanorrigby]

Call it whatever you like but l'd really have to wonder come to think of it ,as a few have said , how you or other women would deal with it vise verse.

My ex w had a few male nurse and carer friends , never really asked how their gf's or wives felt.

But a few have said right here they wouldn't like it one bit.

So are they insecure women too ?

 

I’d say yes. Especially in this context. There are jobs out there that a person would have cause to need to work through some insecure feelings, but this job shouldn’t be one of them.

If OP can’t handle his wife doing this, what other jobs will he have a problem with?

[Coffeeaddict71]

Ive never said my wife should quit her job.. however the truth is.. she has a university education that is not being utilised in this current job.. its low paid and has aspects im uncomfortable with.. look any job that has me or my wife looking at or touching the opposite sex is not something I'm. happy with.. is there a touch of insecurity over comparison.. you bet.. but what guy does not wonder how he measures up to past boyfriends etc.. so. Why should i have the added stress of wondering if i measure up to the young and old men she sees and touches everyday.. in fact being honest.. she sees some of these guys naked and touches them (albeit not sexually) more than im getting.

[preraph]

^ You need to get yourself into therapy, seriously. This isn't her problem. It's all yours. There is nothing sexual about her work. You thinking so is off.

[basil67]

When my brother was in medical school he was thinking obgyn or general practice and his wife strongly objected to obgyn very strongly. So yes, there is some gender bias going on here as usual.

 

Your sisters's objection makes no sense. A GP or even ER physician also do pelvic exams. I feel really sorry for your BIL, having to choose his speciality based on his his wife's insecurities.

[basil67]

Coffee, when she's wiping poop off someone, do you really think she's comparing organ size? Seriously? Such insecurity will do nothing to endear her to you.

[littleblackheart]

Why should i have the added stress of wondering if i measure up to the young and old men she sees and touches everyday.. in fact being honest.. she sees some of these guys naked and touches them (albeit not sexually) more than im getting.

 

Mate. Added stress? Are you sure it's that bad?

 

Could the bolded (ie lack of intimacy) be your actual problem?

[Logo]

Is there anything else that is going on in your marriage or involving your love life that might be affecting the way you're looking at this?

 

If everything else is going well and your thinking about her job is taking place in a vacuum, then I don't see the difference between this and the work done by a nurse or a doctor.

 

Is it the act itself that bothers you or the fact she goes to their private homes?

 

I can't think of anything glamorous about the job. If I had a wife and she found herself having to do that type of work, I would probably be supportive of her.

[JuneL]

OP, I get what you are feeling to an extent, I do. To me, it all depends on the context of the situation. Here are some examples.

 

I remember years ago when I was doing construction, I did a job for a plastic surgeon. While we were working on his house he was outside chatting it up with us about his work, specifically, breast augmentation. He was going into detail about the women who frequented his place, young and old, talking about how nice looking they were before and or after his work was done. Eventually, he took a couple of us inside to show up some pics he had taken of his patients, all legal or so he said at the time. Dude had hundreds of topless female pics. This guy was showing us the pics because he sexualized his patients, period.

 

I am friends with a girl that works as a nurses aide. She is a bit of a pervert, the type of girl always making inappropriate jokes. She's worked in the field for around 20 years now and she tells all sorts of stories about guys with huge hard-ons and how she was flattered that they got erections when she took care of them. She also talked about how she would sometimes flirt back with some of these guys. As an aide, not everyone is old or impaired, some of those guys are recovering from an accident and are good looking people, or they have other issues. One guy she took care of was just a rich, raging alcoholic who hired an aide to take care of him.

 

Not every professional is a cold, robotic machine. We are all humans. Now, I do think that most professionals probably don't see things like the people I mentioned, but they do exist, and the OP's wife even admitted she felt some kind of way about washing dudes' penises. I don't think most of us would have to worry about this sort of thing, but her own words might cause some concern.

 

Did you or your construction co-workers report the perv plastic surgeon to police? That was a serious breach of privacy for his clients.

 

As I mentioned before, there are indeed pervs in the medical profession (like any other profession) out there who took advantage of the situations and that’s why we see cases of sexual abuse and disciplinary actions.

 

OP: Do you believe your wife is a perv and may take advantage of the patients she takes care of?

[Logo]

especially when she has let it slip some get turned on by her washing them

 

Hmmmm now that's interesting. I don't know what to tell you. What was the context? How did she say it? Was she repulsed by it? Did she find it amusing?

[whichwayisup]

Ive never said my wife should quit her job.. however the truth is.. she has a university education that is not being utilised in this current job.. its low paid and has aspects im uncomfortable with.. look any job that has me or my wife looking at or touching the opposite sex is not something I'm. happy with.. is there a touch of insecurity over comparison.. you bet.. but what guy does not wonder how he measures up to past boyfriends etc.. so. Why should i have the added stress of wondering if i measure up to the young and old men she sees and touches everyday.. in fact being honest.. she sees some of these guys naked and touches them (albeit not sexually) more than im getting.

 

Why are you insecure? Why do you think she'd think or compare you to her clients that she's helping? These really are your issues you need to deal with and your insecurities are going to ruin things if you don't face this and learn to trust her and have faith that she isn't comparing you to others.