Husband checking out girls profile and add her as friend

[adna89]

I went on my husbands facebook and a girl wrote to my husband "do we know eachother?" he visited her profile and tried to add her.He says he did it by accident when he was reading some comments on fb and came by her comment...do i believe it? no .why would he even open her profile to check her out after reading comments?...well she was dressed up,tight ,good looking,her breasts were almost visible.if she was a male i doubt he would open up the profile

 

i am disgusted,i always remember how bad i felt for the wives when their husbands aproached me while i sitll was single ....i cant stad the girl thought the same about me,because on his fb profile he has a picture with me.Sure this is not cheating but it shows me he is very much capable of doing it if he gets a chance

[preraph]

It shows he's willing to cheat. You need to call him out about it being "an accident." She's probably an internet prostitute if she's showing all that and going around saying "Do I know you?" So if she's local, he could easily hook up with her. You can't monitor a man out of cheating though. If they do it with prostitutes, they can meet on their way to work for 10 minutes at the drop of a hat. It's a huge business.

[adna89]

I do not talk to him since yesterday i just said i do not believe a **** he says,then he got defensive and tried to insult me.I wont speak to him at all ,i consider a divorce already(my marriage was no good before this as well but at least cheating was something i thougt he would never do)

[stillafool]

Yeah, he's trolling for strange.

[FMW]

From your posting history it seems that this is just one more thing to add to the huge pile of problems. His explanation sounds sketchy and as I said, on top of all the other things you're right to be upset.

[BaileyB]

From your posting history it seems that this is just one more thing to add to the huge pile of problems. .

 

Agree. But considering that you have previously indicated that you are unwilling to consider separation/divorce, I’m not sure that you have any leverage for things to be different. This becomes just one more example of how your husband is not a kind or moral man and your marriage is very unhealthy.

[Art_Critic]

I run into those on occasion while on FB, I do view the profile as that is what you have to do but I then report them if they are obviously a prostitute and also block them..

 

The last thing I would do is friend them up, your Husband is lying.. he accidentally friended her .. it isn't as easy today to do that as it used to be.. years ago you could do it easily accidentally hit the button but today you have to want to do it.

 

Do you think he knew you would find out and did it to get under your skin and piss you off ?

The reason I say that is a few of your past threads it seems he does stuff to you to be mean to you and upset you.. maybe that is what this is.

 

I say you call him out on the lying..go from there.

[adna89]

He wont even try to explain himself,he is all believe whatever you want i do not care about you

[BaileyB]

He wont even try to explain himself,he is all believe whatever you want i do not care about you

 

What does that tell you about the state of your marriage and his level of respect for you - his wife?

[adna89]

What does that tell you about the state of your marriage and his level of respect for you - his wife?

 

 

I know this is a disaster marriage,he thinks i am disrespecting him he is a religious family man and i am accusing him of this so he says all that because he wont take that **** from me anymore(his words)

 

what should i even do now? i want to keep some respect,what do i do just leave it alone till i decide where to go? i have been crying so much and he says so

[Beendaredonedat]

I know this is a disaster marriage,he thinks i am disrespecting him he is a religious family man and i am accusing him of this so he says all that because he wont take that **** from me anymore(his words)

 

what should i even do now? i want to keep some respect,what do i do just leave it alone till i decide where to go? i have been crying so much and he says so

 

You should go see a lawyer and tell him your story and ask what your rights and obligations are and what your husbands are as you are seriously wanting to end the marriage because there is no love involved and the resentment and emotional abuse is taking its toll.

 

Then once you are educated, take what you have learned and start your exit strategy. Tell your husband none of this until you have your exit all planned out.

[BreakOnThrough]

Men are curious and will push the envelope, the "male ego" is really quite strong and mainly unavoidable, it's in their nature. If he went out and cheated and you have such proof, fine, you have every reason to be completely upset and fly off the handle. The fact you are treating him like a child, scolding and carrying on will not bring him any closer, in fact, it will just simply drive him further away. Ask yourself what your intent is before you act, whatever it may be should dictate your actions after careful thought. Your husband may simply just be looking for some love and affection FROM YOU.

[BaileyB]

The fact you are treating him like a child, scolding and carrying on will not bring him any closer, in fact, it will just simply drive him further away. Your husband may simply just be looking for some love and affection FROM YOU.

 

If you read the backstory, you will know that this man is abusive. This woman needs a divorce, not advice to encourage her to be more loving toward her abuser.

[LoveFiend]

I went on my husbands facebook and a girl wrote to my husband "do we know eachother?" he visited her profile and tried to add her.He says he did it by accident when he was reading some comments on fb and came by her comment...do i believe it? no .why would he even open her profile to check her out after reading comments?...well she was dressed up,tight ,good looking,her breasts were almost visible.if she was a male i doubt he would open up the profile

 

i am disgusted,i always remember how bad i felt for the wives when their husbands aproached me while i sitll was single ....i cant stad the girl thought the same about me,because on his fb profile he has a picture with me.Sure this is not cheating but it shows me he is very much capable of doing it if he gets a chance

 

I think you overreacting, my wife does the same thing to me and drives me crazy. She goes nuts just because I have other women on my Facebook account. I tell her they are just friends, or friends of relatives, or family. Whats wrong with having women on there. Yes some of the women are women I have dated before and yes had sex with, but that was so many years ago. They are married now, have a husband,kids ect. Seven of the women on there are girls I met are strippers I met at strip clubs, which I won't tell my wife. Again they are just friends though I only get contacted by them when they are broke and me want meet up for dances either inside or outside the club which I don't do anymore since I am married, but I still keep them as FB friends because I do consider them friends of mine.

[d0nnivain]

It's FB. It's meaningless. The platform is designed to connect people.

 

Your husband sending a friend request to someone is no where near cheating. You are overreacting.

 

However, since you say your marriage was already bad & other posters call him abusive, if this was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back, get out already.

[Betrayed&Stayed]

"do we know each other?"

 

 

That's just plain creepy, no way around it

[BettyDraper]

Adna89, based on your post history I don't understand why you stay with your husband.

[SpiceCat]

I think you overreacting, my wife does the same thing to me and drives me crazy. She goes nuts just because I have other women on my Facebook account. I tell her they are just friends, or friends of relatives, or family. Whats wrong with having women on there. Yes some of the women are women I have dated before and yes had sex with, but that was so many years ago. They are married now, have a husband,kids ect. Seven of the women on there are girls I met are strippers I met at strip clubs, which I won't tell my wife. Again they are just friends though I only get contacted by them when they are broke and me want meet up for dances either inside or outside the club which I don't do anymore since I am married, but I still keep them as FB friends because I do consider them friends of mine.

 

Looking at your post history, you are a terrible husband and should attempt to fix yourself before you give others advice.

 

Adna - based on your post history, your husband is emotionally abusive. Surely this is grounds for divorce?

[Daniel76]

Very sad, there is no trust in the family:(