crazyguy123 Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 This has been the first morning in a while that I woke up angry at an ex. My ex and I were together for about 8 months and we broke up about 3.5 months ago. Most of the time i've been at peace. I feel relaxed but once in a blue moon do I get upset. My ex was toxic when we were together. She was controlling and very manipulative. She wanted everything to be her way. As long as it benefits her she doesn't care about what happens around my life. For example, I wanted to go to my aunts birthday which was the same day as her brothers birthday. She yelled at B*$@hed at me for not wanting to go to her brothers birthday. How do I deal with this anger that I have? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 You congratulate yourself on making progress. After a break up people grieve. Step 1 is denial. Step 2 is anger. Eventually you get to step 5 acceptance. It's not exactly a linear process but the anger does show you are moving forward. Process what you are feeling. It's all part of healing. Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 Yes, exactly what d0nnivain said. It takes time. Anger is one of the signs that you are working through it. You might again feel somewhat peaceful for a while and then have another flare up of anger. It's normal. Hang in there. Link to post Share on other sites
Rayce Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 They say it's part of the process... I'm 7 months out in NC and today I also woke up angry... I was doing so well too for weeks... but then someone decided to mess with my head this week and got me all upset again... now I'm going back and forth between being angry and crying... it's just going to be one of those days. This too will pass... just hang in there. Peace Link to post Share on other sites
nolanola Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 Totally agree with the other posters. I find that if I just sit with whatever I am feeling (whether it's sadness, anger, loneliness, etc) it typically will pass, although sometimes it takes a little longer than others. I went through a period when I was angry a lot. Kind of interspersed with sadness. It has mellowed a lot, but I still feel angry from time to time and I'm also at 7 months. Seeing how far I've come from the earlier months gives me a lot of hope that I will be in an even better place at 8 and 9 months. It's ok to be angry as part of the grieving process. My therapist always says that healing is not a straight line but more like one of those spaghetti plots with lines all over the place. Some days you will be angry and some days you will be sad. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts