karmaaa Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 (edited) Ex girl reached out after months ,then I started chasing her I hung out there every 3-5 days ,got cold and hot replies messages .The last text I sent her almost 2 weeks ,no response .Before that Everything was positive even I called her once.She dumped me due being unavailable to her she felt that I didn’t care and she told me that a lot and I didn’t listen. she was chasing me all the time in the beginning ,after months she got cold so I backed away and disappeared then she got very upset .I did many times until she dumped me . I was about to text again ,then I retreated because I don't want to show my neediness as she ignored my last text ,but at the same time I want her back . should I try my final attempt by double texting or just do nothing ?Any advices how to break this circle? Edited June 19, 2019 by karmaaa Link to post Share on other sites
Silver_star Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 You say she dumped you because you were unavailable to her...in what way? Emotionally/Physically? She felt that you didnt care and that you didnt listen...if you want her back are you prepared to change? She told you what she needs in a relationship and that she wasnt getting it from you. If you are not ready to go all in, you should leave her alone. It will only validate the fact that you do not listen to her. If you are ready to step up and be the man she told you she wanted, then tell her that up front instead of a "hey, come chase me" type of text and maybe she will give you another shot. Link to post Share on other sites
Author karmaaa Posted June 19, 2019 Author Share Posted June 19, 2019 (edited) You say she dumped you because you were unavailable to her...in what way? Emotionally/Physically? She felt that you didnt care and that you didnt listen...if you want her back are you prepared to change? She told you what she needs in a relationship and that she wasnt getting it from you. If you are not ready to go all in, you should leave her alone. It will only validate the fact that you do not listen to her. If you are ready to step up and be the man she told you she wanted, then tell her that up front instead of a "hey, come chase me" type of text and maybe she will give you another shot. After 10 months of the break up she reached out by texting then disappeared ,after days I chased with low contacts messages and one phone call, she respond all of them with hot cold as sometime I got short answers and next day respond. she didn't initiate only one time when she reaches out.Later ,I texted and she ignored it!!! what does that mean?(sign of not interested doesn't want to reconcile) I already tried after 2 months of the break up.Texting her everyday and she respond positively. Next day,I texted and she ignored it .The same circle happens now but this time she reached out and ignored my last text. maybe she is playing games with me IDK ...maybe she was bored and wants validation,,maybe it was a test from her to check if I still care about her by ignoring my last text So if I double my text she may also ignore it as her gaming end .what do u suggest ? Edited June 19, 2019 by karmaaa Link to post Share on other sites
TheFinalWord Posted June 20, 2019 Share Posted June 20, 2019 Well, it's been two weeks. I'm unsure what you are texting for so much, but I would just focus your texts on going on actual dates. Keep the focus of the texts on that. You could wait a few more weeks if you want and try to reach out once more if you want. Probably nothing to lose. But she seems just as hot and cold as you. I don't know what "hanging out there 3-5 times a week" means, but that seems a lot. You mean you are hanging out at her place? Do you ever do anything romantic? Link to post Share on other sites
Author karmaaa Posted June 20, 2019 Author Share Posted June 20, 2019 (edited) Well, it's been two weeks. I'm unsure what you are texting for so much, but I would just focus your texts on going on actual dates. Keep the focus of the texts on that. You could wait a few more weeks if you want and try to reach out once more if you want. Probably nothing to lose. But she seems just as hot and cold as you. I don't know what "hanging out there 3-5 times a week" means, but that seems a lot. You mean you are hanging out at her place? Do you ever do anything romantic? nothing romantic she once replied to my text mentioned my romantic name when I insisted to know what is bothering her ,but in all my text i said her formal name. I already asked her about meeting ,she said okay but no definite date.I mean about hung out by texting her every 3-5 days (to show that i am caring about her)not hanging out at her place. I don't know the purpose of ignoring my last message ,it could be that she wants me to chase her and to see if am actually care because she dumped me as I backed away and disappeared many times even she blamed me about that a lot because I wanted her to chase me like in the beginning of the relationship.However ,it didn't work instead of that she dumped me finally .she even said how w r going to marry and u acting like that (she wanted me to call her everyday ) .To make it clear about the ignoring message I am planning to send her last double message and see if she is going to response or no if yes I am going to call her and ask to meet .If she didn't reply then 100% she is not interested to get back and she was playing game with me to get validation. Edited June 20, 2019 by karmaaa Link to post Share on other sites
Author karmaaa Posted June 26, 2019 Author Share Posted June 26, 2019 I called her again she responded immediately ,we had a very short conversation because she was at work and asked me if there is sth important ,I said no just wanna know how r u doing .We talked a little bit I only asked questions then she the ended the call as someone asked her to do sth at work then she said we talk later ! I don’t know what to do next ? Link to post Share on other sites
emeraldgreen Posted June 27, 2019 Share Posted June 27, 2019 You do nothing, besides getting on with your life. Up to her now! Link to post Share on other sites
Author karmaaa Posted June 28, 2019 Author Share Posted June 28, 2019 (edited) I did 2 calls after ignoring my message .First ,no response but next day she called me back.Second call after days ,she answered immediately .So ,the ball now in her court . Edited June 28, 2019 by karmaaa Link to post Share on other sites
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