Living alone after surgery.

[Vesna]

I've had three breast cancers removed in twelve months, both breasts affected.

 

I will be undergoing bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction, most probably before the end of the year (it's urgent).

 

I'm open to all suggestions on how to cope with all of this when one lives alone. I'm reasonably fit and not an emotionally needy person, hence why I prefer to live alone.

 

I want to know everything and no suggestion is too small or big. :) TIA

[Mr. Lucky]

You don't give insight into your financial situation, can you afford to hire a caretaker as you recover? An alternative might be offering free room and board to someone for the required length of time.

 

Best of luck with your surgery and prognosis...

 

Mr. Lucky

[Happy Lemming]

I only have one small suggestion that I utilized after having eye surgery.

 

I purchased a big 50 pound bag of rice and a cheap pot & lid style rice cooker. I didn't feel like doing a lot of cooking and cleaning as I recovered, so the prep was easy... 1 part rice, two parts water into the cooker, push the button. It clicked when it was done. I ate off of paper plates and clean up was just the rice cooker pot and lid.

 

I also bought some of those frozen meatballs, heated them up in the microwave on a paper plate, cut them up with a knife and added them to the rice. Rice & hamburger seems to settle my stomach, as well.

 

Also added frozen vegetables (heated up on paper plate in microwave). I made butter rice. Added different condiments to the rice, sometimes hoisin sauce, basically anything.

 

I just didn't want to clean up a big mess in the kitchen, nor stand in front of a stove cooking.

 

The rice cooker did the cooking for me and my kitchen wasn't a big mess to clean up.

[Vesna]

Mr Lucky, I am on disability pension but I live comfortably. I have thought of letting my spare room out for the first two or three weeks after the op and that will involve a police and background check.

 

Happy Lemming, thanks for the paper plate suggestion. Normally I would be loathe to use them but I will definitely cut myself some slack and stock up on them.

[LauraXX]

So do you have a good network of friends/family that might be able to come over occasionally?

 

 

 

One of my best friends had major knee surgery a few years ago when she still lived alone and didn't know many people in her city yet. I couldn't come and help her out every single day, but I did pick her up from the hospital, stayed there for a day after the surgery and stacked her freezer with meals that she just had to heat in the oven. I then dropped in about twice a week and brought her whatever she needed, took out the garbage etc.

[Cersei]

I had a hystorectomy about 3 years back and I hate having to rely on other people. My issue was lifting. I had a very light minimum lifting weight.

 

I hated to pay someone to cut my grass but I allowed myself just for the time being. It was only temporary.

 

I had my friends take me for coffee to get me out of the house and every one of them asked what I needed for groceries. I fought it at first but we stopped at the grocery store on the way home and they did the lifting. I took them all out for supper after I was better healed.

 

Laundry was tough because I could not lift the wet clothes into the drier quickly like I normally would. I just took it slow one piece at a time. I made the loads smaller too.

 

I just basically allowed my rules to go out the window temporarily because it was for the best.

 

Best of luck for a speedy recovery.

[Happy Lemming]

Happy Lemming, thanks for the paper plate suggestion. Normally I would be loathe to use them but I will definitely cut myself some slack and stock up on them.

 

Same with silverware. There are actually some nice plastic throw away knives, forks and spoons.

 

Anything to reduce your cleaning and clean up chores.

 

And I didn't worry about keeping my home spotless during that time, just paper towel wiping and cleaning. Anything I could use and throw away during that time.

[alphamale]

get yourself a dog or a cat

[JuneL]

It sounds like you can afford to hire some part-time aid to help you a couple of hours daily, in case you don’t have family or friends around to help. My best friend had ankle surgery a few years ago; she told me the hardest part was getting emotional support. So if you can get a family member or friend to stay a few weeks with you, that would be more important.

[Happy Lemming]

When my girlfriend had surgery, boredom set in fairly quickly.

 

I purchased a used DVD collection of old "Johnny Carson" shows (She likes Johnny Carson) and a bunch of used books (she likes to read).

 

Again, this is small but it broke up her boredom. Start collecting some items that you can break out and enjoy while you are recovering at home.

[JuneL]

p.s. My best friend also spent a lot of timing reading up stuff about her injury and recovery using her smartphone during her immobile weeks.

[Vesna]

I appreciate everyone's suggestions. Thanks! Most probably, I am underestimating my abilities and tackling with the need to ask for and accept help when it is offered. My pride!

 

Now I cast the net and put my pride aside.

[carhill]

Home health nursing service for medical stuff and a scheduled care assistant for other needs. Both are affordable and insurance often covers home health nurses since that's far cheaper than a SNF for recovery.

 

Since you're fine with living alone otherwise, no doubt you'll have the tools to continue that. All you need is some help with certain things your medical situation makes more difficult.

 

As an example, a friend's wife recently had cataract surgeries so couldn't drive. Unfortunately, her H, who normally would assist her, ended up in the hospital with heart issues and did a 28 day stint in ICU after so she ended up dealing with his stuff while recovering. She hired a contract Uber driver to be available daily for her as needed and brought in a housekeeper to help.

 

Best wishes for a positive outcome with your surgeries!

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

I'm so sorry to hear about your upcoming surgery. I hope you are cancer free after the procedure. Are you looking at chemo and/or radiation?

 

First, do not get a cat or a dog lol. That is just one more thing to take care of.

 

Hire a cleaning person to come in once a week if you can afford it. It would only be short term, but it would be an immense help.

 

Grocery delivery (i.e. Peapod) if you have it where you live. Also look into meal delivery services like Blue Apron if you think you will feel up to cooking.

 

Wash all your clothes before the procedure and maybe even buy a few more cheap pairs of PJs and definitely extra underwear, so you don't have to do laundry at all during the worst of the recovery time.

 

Make big batches of soup or casseroles to freeze before your surgery.

 

And, I agree with the paper plates!!

 

Ask for help!!

[preraph]

Normally some home care would be provided for you once you leave the hospital, at least in the US. If you're not in the US, I have no idea. But if you are in the US, ask to speak to a social worker there at the hospital and find out what your options are. They will see to everything and fill out paperwork. Hospitals have one on staff.

 

Surgery takes it out of you the older you are. I had a lump removed at 21 and was out partying the next night, but today it would probably disable me for a week. Talk to your doctor or hospital about having someone just check in on you.