An Unfortunate brother

[unfortunatebro]

Hi Everyone,

 

I am Akash a north Indian guy. I have a relation that is paining me too much. There are the things that are paining me too much. Its not about a love relationship but about the sister love. Not wasting the time here is the short story.

 

Last year I met with a girl in a medical laboratory where she works. I regularly went there almost twice a week to conduct some blood tests. I don't know why and when started to like that girl as my sister and started to care about her. I don't have any bad intention about her. I still don't know why I felt like that. One day she left her job from there . I felt very bad when I came to know from her employer about her resignation. Till now I never told her about my feelings toward her. However I have her mobile number but not talked her over phone except some what's app chatting. One day I asked her over a chat about her new jobs and future plans etc. Then I tell her that I like her as my sister and will be very happy If she accept me as her brother. That time she was Ok with that. We often chat with each other and everything was fine. But one day she suddenly stop responding to me and reply rarely. She started to ignore my messages and even don't read my messages. I asked her what happened. asked her If I made any mistake or what else is matter but she told nothing and one day she block my number without giving any reason.

 

I was very disappointed with that I message her with my alternate number and tell her that how important is she for me and what I planned for he as a brother and want to take this relationship further. It was a long letter with full of my emotions.

 

Then she replied me after two days and said that she is genuinely busy with her stuff and will talk with me when she will have time. She also mentioned that she is happy as my sister and said that she will be always there for me when I need her.

 

That time I was very happy and thanked her for that. But next day she delete her whats app account and changed the number too. She don't even inform me and her number is switched off. I don't know when she accepted me why she did this to me. What I should do. From our last conversation I never realized that she will run away like this. Please help me and advice me what should I do now. I don't have any other number of her and no any way to contact. I just feeling like betrayed. I completely broken and hurt. Please help. Thanks

[schlumpy]

There may be differences in our culture that make what I have to say invalid.

 

I understand the scenario you have set up. A lonely guy sees a girl and has feelings for her. Usually that is either romantic feelings or friend feelings. Sister feelings I guess are somewhere between romantic and friend? I can't remember one instance in my life where I wanted a girl to be my sister.

 

Do you have a real sister?

 

What type of relationship did you see yourself having with her? My sister lives in Florida and calls me once a week to find out if I died or not. Sometimes she reminisces about our childhood and brings up something I did to her that she thinks I owe her for but other then getting some money out of me once in awhile I can't say it's a monument creating relationship. Is this what you were looking for?

 

I have to tell you the truth if I was a friend of hers I would tell her to run away as fast as she could and I would loan her my handgun after finding out you used an alternate number to contact her.

 

Let this one go. It is just too odd. You could find yourself in trouble if you continue to pursue it.

 

Sorry I couldn't be more positive. I am impressed with your command of English.

 

Best Wishes

Edited July 17, 2019 by schlumpy

[Mr. Lucky]

Please help me and advice me what should I do now. I don't have any other number of her and no any way to contact. I just feeling like betrayed. I completely broken and hurt. Please help. Thanks

 

My friend, the possibility exists she has a boyfriend, which complicates her communication with you. Either he's uncomfortable with her talking to you, or she feels it's inappropriate considering her relationship with him.

 

Either way, it looks like she wants some space from you. The right thing to do is to let her set the tone and frequency of any further contact. Sorry this has happened, welcome to LoveShack...

 

Mr. Lucky

[preraph]

Most women know that men have a hard time being "just friends." So she likely believes you would like to progress to something romantic, which I pretty much agree with as well. Because for "just a sister," there wouldn't be all this emotion. So I think she felt it best not to lead you on.

[Foxhall]

Most women know that men have a hard time being "just friends." So she likely believes you would like to progress to something romantic, which I pretty much agree with as well. Because for "just a sister," there wouldn't be all this emotion. So I think she felt it best not to lead you on.

 

 

 

Yes this is the essence of it really,

 

 

you could look on it too that she is doing you a favour, having all this emotion for someone who does not see you in a romantic sense, that is never good mentally for a person.

 

 

you need to work towards not thinking about her so much, get on with your life,

 

 

I actually have experience of this, I have mentioned my Mexican friend a few times here, our relationship is something of a "brother sister" type thing although I want or certainly a couple of years ago anyway wanted more,

 

 

we remain close purely because I have always played it cool with her since she moved back home,

keep the contact fun and light hearted , catch up maybe 3 times per year, birthdays and so on,

She is inviting me to Mexico now funnily enough,

this is based on a friendly light hearted approach, but not pestering her or putting any of my emotional thoughts on her,

 

 

so look it is possible you could have some kind of a relationship with this girl by taking a step back,

 

 

however meeting new people and using your good experiences with this girl to help you meet new people,

 

 

that is the best plan for you.

[unfortunatebro]

Thanks all for your reply, judgment and advice. Yes may be you are right. I had over reacted on this. I think a lot on this and concluded that I should give her space and time. If she want to be she will contact me when she wants but on a serious note I never wanted any romantic relationship and feels like that way. I don't have a real sister but I have cousin. She reminds me of my cousin when I see and talk to her. She also calls me brother and cared me in that way. Secondly, I was not too much engaged with her over phone or chat, We chat when we have some valid reason like receiving reports, analyzing report or when we have to take some advice from each other. Generally once in week.

 

But the things that hurt me is the way she ran and disappeared. I cared her as her brother and nothing else. I am desperate to know only the reason, Suddenly what happened to her so she have to do all this.

[basil67]

The reason? I suspect you were contacting her too often and she grew tired of it. Friends generally don't have the frequency of contact which a couple in love has.

[unfortunatebro]

Hi Everyone,

 

I am Akash a north Indian guy. I have a relation that is paining me too much. There are the things that are paining me too much. Its not about a love relationship but about the sister love. Not wasting the time here is the short story.

 

Last year I met with a girl in a medical laboratory where she works. I regularly went there almost twice a week to conduct some blood tests. I don't know why and when started to like that girl as my sister and started to care about her. I don't have any bad intention about her. I still don't know why I felt like that. One day she left her job from there . I felt very bad when I came to know from her employer about her resignation. Till now I never told her about my feelings toward her. However I have her mobile number but not talked her over phone except some what's app chatting. One day I asked her over a chat about her new jobs and future plans etc. Then I tell her that I like her as my sister and will be very happy If she accept me as her brother. That time she was Ok with that. We often chat with each other and everything was fine. But one day she suddenly stop responding to me and reply rarely. She started to ignore my messages and even don't read my messages. I asked her what happened. asked her If I made any mistake or what else is matter but she told nothing and one day she block my number without giving any reason.

 

I was very disappointed with that I message her with my alternate number and tell her that how important is she for me and what I planned for he as a brother and want to take this relationship further. It was a long letter with full of my emotions.

 

Then she replied me after two days and said that she is genuinely busy with her stuff and will talk with me when she will have time. She also mentioned that she is happy as my sister and said that she will be always there for me when I need her.

 

That time I was very happy and thanked her for that. But next day she delete her whats app account and changed the number too. She don't even inform me and her number is switched off. I don't know when she accepted me why she did this to me. What I should do. From our last conversation I never realized that she will run away like this. Please help me and advice me what should I do now. I don't have any other number of her and no any way to contact. I just feeling like betrayed. I completely broken and hurt. Please help. Thanks

I understand the scenario you have set up. A lonely guy sees a girl and has feelings for her. Usually that is either romantic feelings or friend feelings.

 

I am sorry but I am not lonely I am a married person and have a family and I have introduce her with my wife too.

[GorillaTheater]

I am sorry but I am not lonely I am a married person and have a family and I have introduce her with my wife too.

 

For a married family man you sure are getting wrapped around the axle over this chick.

 

And in case the idiom I used isn't clear, you are way too emotionally invested in this woman for any man, much less a married man.

[foxy418]

Seems to me like you created whatever relationship between you and her in your head... More than with her...

To be honest you sound like a couple of Indian guys that have tried talking to me.. at first to be nice id reply but noticed that they were actually interested and wanted to converse where I'd just politely reply without any interest... Later they become too much and scare me off to the point where I don't even want to know them or have anything to do with them.. and they'd write love letters and it would blow my mind because to me I felt I barely knew them.. let alone be interested... So I'd block and hope they just leave me alone..

Sorry that's just how I see it...