confusion..the essence of life :P

[hanksandbubbles]

*sigh* this probably seems so stupid, but i'm going to post it anyways.

I made out with my guy friend, and of course, we were both kinda drunk.

During that time, he said things such as "i'm infatuated by you".

The next day, he messages me asking if i'm ok from that night. He said that although he was drunk, he enjoyed my company. I told him that i'm fine, though i'm a bit confused about the situation. He also said that he was confused, and that I should come talk to him about the event.

So, I wait until I have a minute alone with him to talk about it. I figure, hey, since this guy SAID i should talk to him about it, I might as well now.

But of course, he tells me he wants to avoid the whole situation, at least for the time being.

SO here i am, angry and confused. He stood me up tonight, telling me tomorrow that we can 'chat'. Personally, I've read enough books to know that this guy just isn't "into me". That's fine with me. What angers me is that he told me that I can talk to him, yet he keeps postponing the talk.

Anyways, I've come up with an ultimatum.

If he doesn't talk to me tomorrow, then i'm telling him straight out that I will forget about our drunken night and move on.

Does that seem bitchy? Or should I continue to 'wait' until his confusion settles.

Bah.

Let me know your thoughts/similar experiences.

Thanks!

bubbles.

[Outcast]

Depends. Is he known for being assertive or is he normally shy and reserved? Does he go after what he wants usually or does he sit back and wait for things? This has to be considered in the overall context of what sort of guy he is. Maybe he's embarrassed and didn't really mean to do it but is worried about telling you in case you'll be mad. Maybe he's interested in you but worried you aren't in him. Or maybe he is confused and thought he only wanted friendship and is sorting himself out.

[HotCaliGirl]

I don't think it's bitchy at all. You shouldn't be left in the dark wondering how he feels, feeling angry and confused, just because HE doesn't feel like talking about it all of a sudden, after he said he would.

 

He could either go at your pace - talk about things now, come to terms with whichever way the both of you decide to proceed, or even if it comes down to one of you needing some time to figure things out - or else just move on.

 

Otherwise, you can go at his pace - have it drag on for a long time, all the while your gut telling you he's not really into you, yet until you talk it out, you'll be left confused.

 

In the past I used to play along, be patient and go through that hell, but it's such a relief to move on. Kind of like if you go out with a guy, if he doesn't call within 2 days - it's time to move on instead of dwelling, giving him an opportunity to make an excuse and go through all the drama. By the time it's convenient for him to call, to his dismay I have unfortunately already have lost all the feelings for him since it's a major turn-off to be left in limbo.

 

You might be scared to lose him, but if he's that unsure that he doesn't want to talk, then you know he probably doesn't want to be with you and he might be afraid to tell you and you're just trying to delay facing the fact, and in the meantime feeling all the anger and frustration, so if he can't make time to talk to you about it today/tomorrow - whatever is best for you - then just move on.

[truelyblue]

i dont think it is being bitchy .......u need to know where u stand ....so go ahead ask him once in for all and then move on.....