How to deal with this male friend/acquaintance?

[Unrequitedlover]

I have this male friend/acquaintance that I know I’m going to spend a lot of time with this fall. We have known each other for two years because we share the same social circle, but he went away for a year but is now back.

 

He is a very “manly” man and very superficial. I’m more “low-maintenance”, and very sensitive. (I’m a girl btw). We just don’t click well together.

 

Our group often hang out at this place, and one time it was only me and him that showed up. It was so painfully awkward that we just sat there in silence with forced talk before 10 minutes in he said he got an “urgent” message and had to go.

 

I had to explain something to him in class one time, but I become so nervous that I started mumbling my words and he just sat there with a blank face.

 

I don’t like him, and if I could avoid him that would be preferable. I have met him a couple of times in the city this summer, where we both have ignored each other and other times said hello. It’s so freaking awkward. How should I deal with him? (We are both in our early twenties)

[preraph]

In what context will you be spending time with him in the fall?

[Unrequitedlover]

In what context will you be spending time with him in the fall?

 

Classes, parties and social hangouts.

[schlumpy]

Just be civil. Say hello and good bye. Talk about the weather. Ask him about the health of his family.

 

Their are countless boring topics that can be brought up in the guise of clever conversation while sending the message that you would rather be talking to some else.

 

 

Best Wishes

[whichwayisup]

Classes, parties and social hangouts.

 

Since he isn't interested in small chat or being friends, just focus on other friends and keep your distance from him. You're not obligated to hang out with him or keep in company when it's just the two of you. Try not to feel weird about it .Some people just don't mix!

[The Outlaw]

If you don't like him, keep your distance as much as possible. Acknowledge him but mingle with other people.

[stillafool]

The way he is acting it should be pretty easy to avoid him. If you bump into him at a party and have eye contact just nod hello and keep it moving.

[preraph]

If you find yourself at another one of those things where you're alone with him, just leave.

 

Otherwise, just do minimal contact with him. Be polite but nothing more. It sounds like he'll be happy to do the same.

[Swingen]

When we are part of a group of friends or a social circle, there are always people in that group that we are closer to and those that we are less so. This is especially true when you are younger due to school, university etc..

 

Clearly you two don't hit it off, neither of you are bad people you just aren't compatible. So keep a couple of polite general conversation topics up your sleeve that will be of interest to him in case you are alone together. If you see him a polite smile and nod is fine.

 

It's important to avoid active dislike. Part of belonging to a social circle is making the effort with those you aren't compatible with as well as kicking along with those you do.