Ruby Slippers Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 Having sex fast doesn't benefit the woman in any way. And in the long run, it's not good for men, either. People having sex with any old body these days is a big part of the reason we have more people single and living alone per capita than at any time in human history. I read somewhere recently that a woman who wants lasting love shouldn't provide easy access to sex, and a man who wants lasting love shouldn't provide easy access to money. Yet so many people do, in the endless search to scratch some temporary itch, which is really just a symptom of a deeper longing that shallow hookups will never fulfill. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 I read somewhere recently that a woman who wants lasting love shouldn't provide easy access to sex, and a man who wants lasting love shouldn't provide easy access to money. wait...I thought women today had their own money? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 Having sex fast doesn't benefit the woman in any way. Unless of course she really enjoys a great shag with a guy who she's got a great connection with. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
5x5 Posted August 31, 2019 Share Posted August 31, 2019 I am a little afraid of getting too close too soon because I have been hurt in the past with my last relationship. I get attached to people easily. I would prefer to prolong this 'getting to know each other' stage before entering the physical world with him. I am not sure how to explain this to him? I don't want him to mistake my arm's length stance as lack of interest and subsequently lose interest himself. Well the bolded explains it, so you could try saying exactly that. At the end of the day some men will wait a long time and some won't. You can end up with a great long term relationship or a dud relationship with either type. Being unable to control the actions of others, there's not a lot you can do to protect yourself from relationships that end. Although if a relationship ends, it's better that it's over instead of being stuck with someone who sux or is loathe to be with you. Having sex fast doesn't benefit the woman in any way. And in the long run, it's not good for men, either. Well that depends upon the man and the woman. Some of us both men and women, have enjoyed themselves and done very well out of doing exactly that. Yet so many people do, in the endless search to scratch some temporary itch, which is really just a symptom of a deeper longing that shallow hookups will never fulfill. I love shallow hook ups, they can be lots of fun. Plus the last shallow hookup I participated in a bit over 23 years ago. Led to a so far splendid 20+ year marriage, to my sexy and equally shallow wife (former winter wench). 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted August 31, 2019 Share Posted August 31, 2019 If I have gone on 2 dates with a gal and we haven't even kissed, there will not be a 3rd. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Maggiemay1 Posted August 31, 2019 Share Posted August 31, 2019 I don’t feel like anyone should compromise what they feel is right for them out of fear of ending up alone. Yet she is compromising what she feels is right by NOT kissing someone she is attracted to and interested in! She is essentially and actively not doing what feels right for her and all because a past relationship failed??? My guess is she kissed him on first date. But that’s not the reason the relationship failed. She is not being herself with someone different. Thinking that will create a different outcome. But that’s just silly!!! OP, stop creating silly rules based on the past. If you are attracted and a moment arises to kiss , then do so!!! Instead you have created some awkwardness for the 3rd or 4th date and a kiss won’t be a natural one!!! Why would you do that??? And miss out on a lovely impulsive moment? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Arsha Posted September 1, 2019 Share Posted September 1, 2019 I would say he is structured if he is not willing to wait for you. I'm glad you want to take things slow. Only structured people want to hurry things up. Link to post Share on other sites
Maggiemay1 Posted September 2, 2019 Share Posted September 2, 2019 Arsha, Your multiple posts suggest you are not coming here for guidance , rather for research. What is the research and for whom? Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted September 9, 2019 Share Posted September 9, 2019 I have started seeing a new guy whom I am fond of, we have been on a couple of dates so far. The only thing is that I feel he might be moving a little too fast for me. He is expecting a kiss soon (he hinted at wanting to kiss earlier but I said I'm a girl who doesn't kiss for the first 3 or 4 dates, which he respected). So... did you kiss him? I am a little afraid of getting too close too soon because I have been hurt in the past with my last relationship. I get attached to people easily. I would prefer to prolong this 'getting to know each other' stage before entering the physical world with him. I am not sure how to explain this to him? I don't want him to mistake my arm's length stance as lack of interest and subsequently lose interest himself. Thanks for the advice I wouldn't explain anything, unless he brings up the subject. I think non verbal communication should express how I feel about him. What about a kiss on the cheek at least? Or a hug? You can tell if there's chemistry even with those... Link to post Share on other sites
fred123 Posted September 10, 2019 Share Posted September 10, 2019 the problem youhave and what iv encountered with women is lies. Im dating a girl for example who is like OP and she tells me she likes to take thigns slow and not kiss on the third date. I as a mug who genuinley likes her accepts tis premise. I later find out that she ****s men on the first date and after we stopep datign she slept with guys instantly. explain that? Link to post Share on other sites
emeraldgreen Posted September 10, 2019 Share Posted September 10, 2019 We don't hate waiting but we hate rules. Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted September 10, 2019 Share Posted September 10, 2019 You take your time girl. If he cannot wait then let him go. If you are someone that has a great personality and has other things to offer apart from the physical part, you have nothing to worry. Link to post Share on other sites
fred123 Posted September 10, 2019 Share Posted September 10, 2019 women who use that line or i need time to get over my ex or i just got out of a relationship is all lies? they then end up in a relationship shortly after hm Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted September 10, 2019 Share Posted September 10, 2019 You take your time girl. If he cannot wait then let him go. If you are someone that has a great personality and has other things to offer apart from the physical part, you have nothing to worry. She is obviously not ready to be dating. It's not "you take your time girl," it's "don't waste other people's time, girl." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
The Outlaw Posted September 10, 2019 Share Posted September 10, 2019 Depends on the guy, but personally speaking, I don't think I would. If he understands and is patient with you, he's a keeper. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
crispytoast Posted September 10, 2019 Share Posted September 10, 2019 the problem youhave and what iv encountered with women is lies. Im dating a girl for example who is like OP and she tells me she likes to take thigns slow and not kiss on the third date. I as a mug who genuinley likes her accepts tis premise. I later find out that she ****s men on the first date and after we stopep datign she slept with guys instantly. explain that? She wasn't that into you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts