The Best Match

[Mysterio]

Based on what I am about to state. What do you all think the best dating match would be for me.

 

I am 5'9, Black Male. Shaved head and clean cut appearance. STylish in the sense that I dress up or if casual. Where Rock and Roll T's or some sort of logo like a Tiger/Lion. Think Lucky Brand T's. Leather Jacket, Jeans.

 

Boyishly handsome by my standards. I am 198 lbs and striving for a goal weight at about 180 or so. I am in fit shape and work out/swim at the YMCA.

 

I am soft spoken. Dry sense of humour. Introspective and talkative. I can talk about many things, but I am not an Egghead spouting stats. I am a Budhist Chanter. I work as a Patient Transporter at the biggest Hospital in my city. I am a Canadian.

 

I like to go out to music venues.Movies/Plays when they come up. More Music/Movie venues. I love to talk about life etc. Much like I do hear. I have my own Condo. A cat that I foster and love up. Lots of friends that I catch up with when time permits.

 

I am a big Lover of Music. Led Zeppelin/Aerosmith/Heart/AC/DC,Van Halen/Hendrix. I love Soul music as well. James Brown. A little Reggae-Bob Marley for the most part. Jazz as well.

 

So what would you think is the best match for me. Age and status wise?

 

I am 48. I was born in 1971. I have never been married or had kids. Just short term dating and few GF. Last GF was 2012. We broke up due to her wanting to fast track having a kid. She does have one now. Thanks to In vitro.

 

I don't think I come off as heavy, except that my love life is heavy in the sense that I feel nothing is workable.

 

Should I focus on childless women. Or do I say that my time has past where I can be that diligent in stating that I want a childless woman and have to accept her as having kids. I am still on the fence of having kids. That woman would have to be so solid to me in my mind, where we barley have any strife for the most part.

 

Anyways. Thanks for chiming in.

[Gaeta]

There is no type of 'style' that fits better with some other type of 'style'. I have a classy style, always in dress and high heels on work days and I've dated men that were in track suits most days, dated hipsters style, I've dated jeans & t-shirt guys, I've dated heavy-set men, tall and thin, short and husky, all this means nothing. What is important is that you feel a mutual attraction and have a common goal and common interests. You don't have to have ALL the same common interest but a couple at least. When you search for a lady don't bug your mind with her style, you may be exactly what she's looking for.

 

As for having children I think you can keep an open mind, who knows maybe you'll meet a younger woman but accept it may never happen. My ex-husband was 48 when his daughter was born. His 2nd wife was 40 and she got pregnant right away.

 

I understand you want a solid partner to have your children with but no one is perfect. Even with a perfect partner there will be misunderstanding and disagreements, we are all human beings and no one is perfect. If down the road it doesn't work then be it. You won't regret having children because you divorce. Children will there to love you forever.

 

 

 

 

.

Edited August 29, 2019 by Gaeta

[RecentChange]

Your best match would be a woman that you connect with.

 

Someone who understands you, and you understand her.

 

Someone who has a common vision of the future, and similar goals.

 

Someone that is easy for you to be around, and vice versa.

 

Someone you feel "at home" with.

 

It's not a list of traits. It's not jotting down notes regarding what she will look like, talk like, dress like etc.

 

To me - finding love is about a meeting of the souls, someone who you feel comfortable showing your core to - and they accept and love it.

 

My husband wasn't what I thought I would want "on paper" in fact I rejected his first advances because "I didn't like jocks".

 

But he got me, he understood me. Yes there was that initial physical attraction - but once we had a chance to get to know each other, things fell into place.

 

We had similar childhoods, similar struggles and positives, which I believe shaped our personalities and world views in ways that allowed us to really understand each other and connect.

 

Personality wise, he reminds me very much of my father - so you could say he felt familiar, and was a kind of man I was used to "handling" (type A but kind).

 

The more we got to know each other we discovered we had similar aspirations, similar visions of the future. For both of us that meant no children - that can be a huge hurdle so it was a relief that we were on the same page.

 

But that is my advice - spending time imagining a dream girl doesn't make her appear. But it could cloud your vision so that you dismiss those that might actually be a soul mate.

[smackie9]

Come on you are 48, let's just admit you don't want kids....that's fine because most woman around your age, their kids are grown and gone. There are plenty of women out there that are independent/fit/have their own career/ looking for simple companionship, and that would be enough to be a good fit me thinks.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

I am a Budhist Chanter. I work as a Patient Transporter at the biggest Hospital in my city.

 

These two things stuck out to me.

 

1. Does your religion have specific views about women? Do you think that some women may be put off by their assumptions about your religion, or at least a misunderstanding of it? Among your Buddhist friends, what are their wives/girlfriends like? What are their relationships like?

 

2. Do you have career aspirations beyond being a patient transporter? Seems like quite an entry-level job for a 48-year-old.

[Mysterio]

I have been at my job for 20 yrs. I love it. It has its ups and downs. What I like is the closeness it is to my Condo. The Job is constantly under construction.

 

Sometimes simple is the best. I want to stay in a hospital environment. I get deep satisfaction for Patient care. I don't want to work at a bank or sit and do computer work all day long. If something comes up in the hospital. I can take a look at it and see if my skill set is there. Its Entry level, but we have people in and out of that job and its not to go to something more aspirational. I guess I could try Human Resources.

 

My job and dating life, don't really collide. The women I meet are not really looking at my earning potentials or quizzing me why I am just a Patient Transporter.

 

I will however keep my eyes open for opportunities when they arise.

[Mysterio]

My Buddhist group dose not have strict view on the opposite sex. We get together and chant for the happiness and high life levels for all humankind.

[chillii]

Yeah , l dunno if you can sorta list things , def' not in too much detail.

l have a very specific kinda thing l like and l'm very fussy, hard to explain though but l was also open.

Did you love that ex , was it all good apart from the child thing ?

You've really gotta consider your partners situation in that kinda thing, especially age and stuff. Shame you couldn't work it out.

And yeah , someone new now will probably have a grown child anyway. But eh , wanting someone with one only or something , that's ok. l've always only been open to one and it was fine , but none at all might be a big ask.

 

As l said once l'd be thinking your religion might be a slight hickup , can you meet women of the same ?

As far as the rest , you obviously need someone nice that's a good person , caring and sensitive , and talkative and just a nice chick, yaknow.

lf you use date sites , look for stuff like that and quality in the way she's described things, and def' no signs of shallowness .

 

Anyway , good luck.

[mark clemson]

How are your body language and mannerisms? Do you come across as slightly "alpha"? No slumped shoulders. Nice gait that shows slightly elevated energy. That tends to help generally (not always). Hope you read the thread on Being attractive to women and are trying to apply some of it.

 

Do you want an "ideal" match or do you want a woman? I would guess there are a fair number of slightly overweight mid-30's single moms who you can get along with reasonably well out there and who would love a halfway decent man in their life. It's called reality, IMO.

 

If she has only one kid, perhaps you could create the little brother or sister to go along?

 

But - can you deal with that? Not every can/cares to. It's a personal choice. Waiting for better might pay off. Might.

[alphamale]

#1) Zeppelin is one of my faves too

#2) It's way too late for you to start a family

[preraph]

Led Zeppelin was such a great band.

 

I like all those bands you like. Being the type of business you're in, I'm surprised you haven't met an ENT or nurse! Seems like a ripe environment to meet people.

 

I hear you about kids. At your age, it will be pretty tough to find someone without them, though. I mean, I don't have them, but I realize I am an anomaly.

 

I would just say before you resign yourself to never dating someone with kids, maybe it's worth an experiment to makes sure. Take a two-hour a week volunteer job helping kids somewhere. Even though I never wanted kids, I find that I like certain age groups (never toddlers or babies) somewhat, once I can become interested in their goings-on and once they're not constantly bugging you for attention.

 

Also, at your age, a woman your age, her kids are likely out of the house or close to it, if they're ever going to leave (you don't know these days). But then grandkids are just around the corner, and that can be very annoying if the kids expect their parents to take responsibility for regular childcare, so you'd have to find someone who was dedicated to NOT letting that happen. Really, a grandparent can enjoy the grandkids a whole lot when it's just them seeing them when they want and not having the responsibility, but raising them is another thing entirely that you don't want to get into.

 

Anyway, you might find that you develop more empathy with some of them. Anyway, kids are supposed to leave the house, so just for now weed out the ones with young ones. At 48, no one should have youngs ones, but possibly teens, who can run you to death and hate your guts.

[Veronica73]

Babies are soooo boring if they aren’t your own. Off topic I know. Just had to get that out.

[Foxhall]

. I love to talk about life etc.

 

.

 

Astrology is an ancient art, studied since time immemorial, that includes but is not limited to: astronomy, philosophy, intuition, psychology, mathematics and plain common sense. Most of all it is a language par excellence for talking about Life with all its complications and constant changes, that can lead to a better understanding of our place in the cosmos.

 

lol this is a meetup group e mail that I was invited to this week,- Astrology group is the name of it.

 

Im sure you'll find a similar meet up in Canada,

 

otherwise, yes why not some of the nurses in the hospital, surely worth a shot.