My ex has reached out to me now what?

[Kath121]

So my ex broke up with me 2 months ago due to his new job was giving me a tone of stress and he wasn't in the right mental state. I tried to be there for him but sadly I couldn't do a lot. I ended up going no contact and for 2 weeks and last week he reached out to me and apologised and said he was sorry if I felt mucked around and he still thought about me a lot and said sorry for being a twat I was in a bad place. I said thank you for the apology but just wished you would of told me everything that was up I would of tried helped you more or even understood it more.

Since last week his been really full on with me calling me beautiful says he misses me and so on. I haven't been full on with him at all iv let him take the lead. I have mentioned tho that I found him handsome and I still am attracted to him.

 

So basically im not sure what to do from here. I basically asked him if he fancied meeting up and he was extremely cold with me. He said he would speak to me regarding this. But he hasn't done so yet. Have I asked too soon about meeting up as its only been a week of contact or does he truly not want to meet me? I just don't get it and don't know really what to do. Iv held off the last 2 days asking him anything as thought perhaps space maybe ideal. His still been chatty with me but I just don't really know what to do about the meeting part of things. Im feeling abit confused and unsure what to do. I don't want to come across needy ect I do want to see him. But obviously trying to play things cool and not jump the gun abit.

 

Perhaps someone on here maybe give me some advice

 

Thanks x

[Silver_star]

Sounds super frustrating.

I would be too.

 

You are being too available to him. He knows he can have you back whenever he wants, and he is taking advantage of that.

Very immature move. Now it's time you should turn the table. He broke up with you...so let him chase you down to meet up.

 

I think you have been more than kind when you asked him to meet up considering how he ended things. He is acting like a coward, and something doesn't sound right in his words about why he wanted to break up. Job stress, in an otherwise good relationship doesnt make someone want to break up...

 

If he is not trying to reconcile with you now, or meet up with you to get back together then what is the point in him telling you that you are beautiful or that he misses you? It's so he can keep you under his thumb. I think it's so he can remain single and uncommitted while still keeping your attention for his own ego. Very selfish.

 

I would back off from being chatty with him, keep it short. No contact or Low contact. Stop offering to meet up with him. The ball is in his court, but don't move mountains for someone who is so unsure of you that they broke up with you.

[Kath121]

 

I would back off from being chatty with him, keep it short. No contact or Low contact. Stop offering to meet up with him. The ball is in his court, but don't move mountains for someone who is so unsure of you that they broke up with you.

 

Hiya no youre exactly right. I only asked him if he fancied meeting up the once. Iv kinda backed off as I got a really cold reaction. He said he would talk to me in regards to that ( iv left it 2 days now and he hasn't said anything about what he means ) his just been chatting with me about other stuff. I do understand perhaps a week of talking was abit too soon to be asking to meet up considering he did dump me so perhaps I should of not done it. But I wont mention it I don't think and like you said pull back abit now and see what happens. I am to available to him like you said.

 

 

 

P.S it also wasn't just his job that he dumped me. There was a bad incident happened involving one of his friends killing themselves and he then started a new job. He said he was in a very dark place at the time. And he said regarding me he should of dealt with it differently. I didn't meantion that as I thought would be abit too much information. But I now think its abit cruitial I mention it as I think was due to all over whelming and his mental health.