Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 Don't worry about it. You're doing each other now and that's all that's important. You're the one now. It's all good. The rest doesn't matter. It obviously does matter if everyone here is so sure that hes not actually into me and that he isnt even over her Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 It obviously does matter if everyone here is so sure that hes not actually into me and that he isnt even over her We're a bunch of strangers on the internet who don't know you or him. You asked us what we think. We have universally told you we think he's lying to you, using you & that he's a worthless person. You consistently defend him & assert all is well. You martial what evidence that you think you have to support your theory that your relationship is grand. If that is true, why do you care what we think? Close your computer, stick your head back in the sand, continue to be with him & pray you don't get pregnant unless you are prepared to be a single mom who gets zero support from the baby daddy. Best wishes 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 We're a bunch of strangers on the internet who don't know you or him. You dont need to know him to form an opinion based on the facts i have given. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 I just feel like there has to be more to it. That maybe there is a way that he really does just think of her as a friend now Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 You dont need to know him to form an opinion based on the facts i have given. And I did -- it's incredibly negative. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 I know. Yours and everyone elses. I just cant see how there cant be even just one part of it or just one persons opinion that isnt entirely negative Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 I just cant see how there cant be even just one part of it or just one persons opinion that isnt entirely negative Because you like him. You want the happy fairy tale ending so much that you refuse to see the reality of the situation clearly. You went into this with your eyes shut & your hopes up. You want it to work. You posted here because deep down you know that there are serious problems but you don't want to face them. There are things about you that you aren't telling us but even from here we know that you have self esteem issues & that you are terrified of being alone. You want this relationship sooooo badly because you fear that this disaster is the best you are ever going to get. It will be the best you ever get if you don't end it. If you dump him & work on yourself, in time you will find a good guy who makes all your dreams come true but it will never be him. He doesn't have enough character to be a Knight in Shining Armor for you or anybody else. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 I get that. But i saw the texts where he broke up with her and he told her the same. That he had fallen out of love with her Of course he has. He's in love with you so stop worrying yourself about it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 (edited) I just feel like there has to be more to it. That maybe there is a way that he really does just think of her as a friend now We have explored every facet of your relationship and at every corner you re-assured us, again and again that he's only with you and that he's a good devoted boyfriend, so you need to stop worrying, if he's that good of a boyfriend then they are just friends. Edited October 24, 2019 by Gaeta 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 if he that good of a boyfriend then they are just friends. Except even if i told you he was the most attentive boyfriend, taking me to nice places and making me feel special, you still wouldnt believe they were just friends. Would you? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 Except even if i told you he was the most attentive boyfriend, taking me to nice places and making me feel special, you still wouldnt believe they were just friends. Would you? Honestly: NO 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 If that were the case then what would your opinion be based on? The amount of communication they have? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 The amount of communication they have? Not the quantity (although that is a factor) but the quality. They are friendly & doing all sorts of things as a family because that is what they are -- a dysfunctional family but a family nonetheless. He tells you all this stuff but he still acts attached to her. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 If that were the case then what would your opinion be based on? The amount of communication they have? You really want me to repeat all of that to you?? again?? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 I know they do things as a family when he sees the children but they dont do it very often. Theyve been split anout 2 months and have only seen eachother 4 times in that time. And 2 of those were 2 days in a row and only because it was one of the childrens birthdays Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 Lucy: They have a long history of on and off before the babies. This break up is just another 'off moment' for them. They will be back together again. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 You really want me to repeat all of that to you?? again?? No. Im asking if it were the case that he were an exceptional boyfriend, why would your opinion still be that they arent just friends? Link to post Share on other sites
fishlips Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 He probably told you he loves you to get in your pants. If he really loved you, he wouldn't be doing family things with her. Sure exes with kids have to communicate because of their kids, and some even remain friendly, but they don't do things as a family. Responsible parents wouldn't lead on their kids like that. You would be better off detaching yourself from this drama and find a guy who can commit to only you. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 No. Im asking if it were the case that he were an exceptional boyfriend, why would your opinion still be that they arent just friends? To be an exceptional BF he would have had to: * not started up with you while you were working together * gotten his act together & got meaningful employment * reflected for a while before starting up with another woman (you) * not acted like a family unit with her * been able to afford his life & his children * paid child support * been an honorable person with integrity He did not of that. Hence he's a lousy BF even if he wasn't sleeping with both of you at the same time & pining for her. You are a place holder until she fully takes him back. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 No. Im asking if it were the case that he were an exceptional boyfriend, why would your opinion still be that they arent just friends? She means they aren't just friends they are co-parents. Other than that he is an exceptional boyfriend to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 I wasnt saying he was an exceptional boyfriend, i was asking why the opinions would be the same even if he was. And he already knows she wants him back so he could go back to her any time he liked if that was what he wanted Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 If that were the case then what would your opinion be based on? The amount of communication they have? Why do you care if Gaeta believes you? How does that help your relationship? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 Honey he wants to make her suffer. He's playing games. He knows you are willing to put up with him & all his garbage so he's biding his time to punish her. He's doing this because he's a cruel man who is playing egotistical immature power games. She is putting up with him & throwing you in her face because she doesn't have any more sense or self esteem then you do. Trust me, he knows how to pick 'em. She is also trying to do right by her kids making sure they still have their dad, even though he's worthless. Why is it that you think you can't do better? Why are you putting up with this? Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 24, 2019 Share Posted October 24, 2019 I wasnt saying he was an exceptional boyfriend, i was asking why the opinions would be the same even if he was. And he already knows she wants him back so he could go back to her any time he liked if that was what he wanted No I said he's exceptional. You are right he could go back but he is with you. So why question us, we don't sleep with you, believe him and be happy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lucyjane86 Posted October 24, 2019 Author Share Posted October 24, 2019 Why do you care if Gaeta believes you? How does that help your relationship? I dont. That wasnt the point of my question Link to post Share on other sites
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