jm5423 Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 My girlfriend and I have been dating for 6 months now. We met on Facebook, I messaged her after she came up as a suggested friend and thought she was really pretty and her status was listed as Single. Our relationship is going pretty well and is getting more serious now. I have met her family and we spend time with her kids and mine together. After we started dating I removed my FB status as it previously said "Single". Her status on the other hand still is set to "Single". The only thing that bothers me is that she has told me numerous times that other guys from her past have recently been messaging her and asking her out. She says that she is telling them she is busy or dating someone else. I told her i don't put much emphasis in FB statuses, however her Single status is inviting as it makes it look like she is available and/or not in an exclusive relationship. She seems to agree with me but still won't remove her Single status. Other than this I don't have a reason to worry about the relationship, but I do wonder why she refuses to change it after I have mentioned it a couple times already and how it looks. Am I being overly paranoid? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 Have you met her friends and family? Does she post pictures of you 2 together? I have set my status to 'in relationship' 4 years ago and I still get messages from men. I don't think they pay attention to that. . Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 I never had to deal with this. By the time social media became a thing I was already married so my status has always been married as has my husband's status. Most social media trivial IMO. However, you two "met" through FB & presumably one of the reasons you reached out was because her status said single. I would mention to her that you realize you are being a bit silly because it's "only" FB but since it does upset you that you would greatly appreciate it if she could change her status. Make it as something she's doing for you because she cares about you. If she really kicks up a fuss about something so trivial you made need to take a step back & reevaluate everything about your relationship. IMO when one person wants something that should be effortless for the other person to give but it's withheld, there are deeper issues. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jm5423 Posted October 14, 2019 Author Share Posted October 14, 2019 She did post a pic of us once together. It was buried in a group of other random photos, so not real easy to find. Her profile pictures are just of her. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 One of my friends recently changed her status to In a Relationship and I swear that everyone congratulated her in a similar way to as if she'd announced an engagement. It was ridiculous. Perhaps no relationship status is the compromise? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
snowboy91 Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 One of my friends recently changed her status to In a Relationship and I swear that everyone congratulated her in a similar way to as if she'd announced an engagement. It was ridiculous. Same thing happened to me when my partner put our relationship status on FB. It's a lot of pressure on a new relationship. I keep mine hidden from my intro, so as a result I forgot to "accept" the relationship for about 8 months after it was officially announced... oops! I'd agree that keeping her status as "single" isn't a great idea - it's just going to confuse others. If she's worried about the announcement, then it's worth just hiding the status. Otherwise she's just enjoying the attention from other guys... which isn't great. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 Yeah, I think no relationship status until there's a real announcement Link to post Share on other sites
crispytoast Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 (edited) I dated my ex for 3 years and we never set a relationship status. In fact the whole time she was "married" to her best friend. I just had nothing set. Making a relationship "Facebook Official" is pretty unnecessary. If you have a problem with the single status, just ask her if she can hide it. Personally I would never want my relationship public on Facebook. There are too many people that are distant friends who really have no business knowing who I'm dating. Edited October 15, 2019 by crispytoast Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 Until you said you brought it up I figured it was probably an oversight. But it is pretty clear now that she has it visible as single because she likes the attention from other men. That's the most positive read on it. The worst read on it is that she's actively looking for other men. It would make me feel uncomfortable. She should just hide it. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 She did post a pic of us once together. It was buried in a group of other random photos, so not real easy to find. Her profile pictures are just of her. So after 6 months you have not met her friends or family, and she doesn't post pictures of you as a couple. Are you sure you're her boyfriend? . Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 Well, to some people, "not single" equals married, not just dating. Her options are open unless you two have agreed to be exclusive at minimum or are engaged. Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterio Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 You both should be on the same page of status. So if your both dating each other. Then you both should think about being insynch. If she is single FBwise. Then you echo that. Show her your FC profile and say lets be the same. If she says no. Then she can watch you change your status from attached to single, right in front of her. Link to post Share on other sites
Maddie82 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 She's not into this relationship as much as you are. She still wants to be seen as single because she's keeping her options open. The reason she hasn't changed it is because she likes the attention from other men and she will be willing to drop you if she got a better offer. Link to post Share on other sites
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