"We're low on matches, check back later"

[SumGuy]

I sound a good bit, rather a lot, like you. How do you get this to work, exactly? I'd murder for three dates a year, let alone three dates a week!

Hi mr_ybor i do think we sound a fair bit alike, though you'd probably judge me as basic and I would just smile Though I am older (low 50s), and have three kids who will all be out of the house in the next 2 years, and seek women 45-60.

 

Now my knowledge of Tampa is limited, but not zero, and my knowledge of your profile and OLD apps limited, though do understand you are 42 looking for women 21-36 and not interested in women with kids.

 

I also understand, you are looking for someone not basic (not bourgeoisie), fair enough, and looking for more than a hook up.

 

I don't know if you are seeking to have kids of your own though, that is kind of a big deal in matching with people, especially at 42.

 

Correct me if I am wrong or fill me in on any of the above. I'd have to say if you are looking for kids or not looking for kids is a very important variable in this equation.

 

In my limited opinion, you are not going to get many matches with those criteria.

 

The age range thing especially, you have to really ask yourself why would a 36 year old woman with no kids would seek a 42 year old man? Or better yet, why she would not seek a 42 year old man? What about someone 6 years older would potentially turn her off, and do you have or even appear to have any of those traits.

 

It may also help to put yourself in their shoes to keep in mind why you are not seeking women 6+ years older than you. Some or a lot of your reasons could be the same ones women use to weed you out.

 

Especially why would a non-basic woman want to go out with a man 6-21 years older than her? If how you speak about basic people is the way she would then wouldn't she consider a man 6-21 years older than her to be lame, and the older he is the less like he is to "get it"?

 

My understanding for why women seek older men is also limited, but it would appear that the women who would do so are either in your basic category or are looking for something you lack or do not have as much of as a man closer to their age. I also believe that Tampa has a fair number of younger people so you have a lot of competition.

 

My initial "advice" based on what little I know would be three fold, re-consider the things you view as basic as a filtering mechanism, consider dating women in the age range 36-48 (if you are not looking to have kids of your own), and third think about what it is about a woman with kids that is a deal breaker for you as there may be women with kids that have a situation that is not a deal breaker for you.

 

If you are looking to have kids of your own, with a younger woman who has no kids, i think you are in a very, very tough space if you weed out basic women.