jelously, or what?

[-ATM SHAWTY-]

I use to go with this guy, our relationship really didn't work out but through the whole thing me and his cousin always talked a lot. People warned us that we shouldn't because we were going to build a bond. Let's say the guy I was going out with's name is Patrick, and his cousin's name is Joe. Well me and Patrick broke up, and I found out Joe and I both had feelings for each other. It's was a little hard in the beginning, because we tried to hide it from Patrick, but he had enough common-sense to figure it out on his own. Let me get to the point... It was a girl that like Joe before we started going out, but he doesn't and did not like her. I met her and she seems really nice, but she is always around him still and it bugs the h*ll out of me.Also because she smokes, and Joe stopped smoking for me so I am scared that he is going to start back because of her,which he told me that he wouldn't do. What should I do..........

[Gemma]

A: sub-conciously (sorry can't spell today) you are probably worried that the way you and "joe" fell in love and became close to one another is going to happen with him and this other girl because they are always hanging around they way you guys were.

 

B: He doesn't like her so you don't have to worry right now, but I would ask him to be distance himself a little bit from her. You don't need someone hanging around in the wings who is there NOT as a freind but hoping to develop a relationship with him. What happens when you guys are fighting, is she there to "console" him. This will probably not happen, but it is a concern as I have seen it happen to others before. Also, I think you are more concerned about her enroaching on your relationship with him. You guys are together, and she wants to share his time. If he wants to keep her as a freind, then it's a freind you two share, not his freind he sees when you are not around. I'm sure once she sees you guys together more (and the affection you show each other), she may cool off. He seems like a really great guy, after all he gave up smoking for you. Don't be too pushy about this, but just tell him how you feel. Your relationship is new and needs to be protected. Even if it's "jealousy" or insecurity, it is a valid feeling and you should feel secure in your relationship with him.