Paying A Fairly Attractive Woman To Cuddle With Me.

[GuitarGuy7]

I'm just tired of being lonely and being deprived of female affection. My loneliness feels like a prison with no means of escape; iv'e been stuck in this hell hole for the past four years.. I already know that i'll never have a girlfriend because I have too many unfixable flaws working against me, i'm short, and have aspergers, but I still want to know what it's like to experience intimacy and companionship.

 

 

So I was thinking about asking some girls I know and offer them $40 to $50 to cuddle and talk with me for 30 minutes and pretend to care about me. Fully clothed, no sex, I just wanna cuddle and talk, so I can actually feel like a normal human being.

 

 

Do you think any woman would actually say yes?

[JustGettingBy]

I'd advise against it. It may act like porn or other form of face stimulation which would be both

 

a) addictive

 

and

 

b) make you feel worse about your situation

 

You might be able to fool your unconscious deep down temporarily, but deep down you'll know its fake.

[alphamale]

go for it GG7....call a reputable escort agency and tell them EXACTLY what you want. You'll probably pay $200-$300 for an hour of cuddles. it'll help your self esteem issues. enjoy!

[Artdeco]

go for it GG7....call a reputable escort agency and tell them EXACTLY what you want. You'll probably pay $200-$300 for an hour of cuddles. it'll help your self esteem issues. enjoy!

 

That would be fine. But he’s talking about paying $40 to somebody he actually knows. No no no. If you really want to pay for that kind of a service, hire an escort (like alphamale said), and do not ever approach somebody you actually know in real life.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

There are people who do this for a living. Hire one of them....don't solicit a friend who would be really creeped out by it.

[mark clemson]

I'm pretty sure CO is right that there are indeed exactly this kind of services out there.

 

I'd say rather than an escort service, go the sugar daddy route. (I would have the issue of "just WHO am I cuddling here", given how messed up may prostitutes are from drugs and abuse).

 

Of course the sugar baby may or may not be into it. A rejection or 2 (IF they occur) would of course sting, BUT if you ask enough of them I think it's probably likely you will find one or more who are just fine with it.

 

Although I DON'T have direct experience, I would expect many/most sugar babies expect the relationship to go sexual sooner or later anyhow. Cuddling would probably be perceived as a prelude to this.

 

Agree that it IS likely to make you horny etc, as warned in a prior post. You'll definitely need to maintain your self control.

[d0nnivain]

I think you are gonna get slapped because she's gonna be insulted that you are treating her like a prostitute. Use a real pro if you must but don't do this. This idea is even worse then asking past dates why they rejected you.

 

Do you have any close female friends you could ask for pointers or fix ups?

[GuitarGuy7]

Prostitution is illegal in most parts of the country where I’m from and the only place where it’s legal is 20 hours away. If it were legal and nearby, I probably would have gone by now.

 

Sure I could break the law and try to find a street prostitute but it’s far more risky and I doubt that the quality of the service would be very good so it’s not worth it.

 

I did look into professional cuddlers but I don’t live in a super big city and the only person who offers it is a 60 something year old woman.

[chillii]

Nope l'd listen to the women here and don't ask friends for God sake, could get really messy and they'll tell everyone even worse , maybe a slight chance of an up side could be one of her friends might go for it but l'd say don't risk it. Don't even mention your idea to anyone you know.

Why not try an internet ad on some site locally to where you are, email only no number or friends might see it, or get a second number.

l've seen stuff like this on mine from women and men, also looking for friends , dining partners, movies.

[GuitarGuy7]

Nope l'd listen to the women here and don't ask friends for God sake, could get really messy and they'll tell everyone even worse , maybe a slight chance of an up side could be one of her friends might go for it but l'd say don't risk it.

 

 

You have a point.

 

Let’s just say I ask one girl in my music clsss to cuddle with me for $50 and she’s disgusted by the offer and says no, and now she tells everybody in the club when I’m not around. “Oh my god, this is what Guitarguy7 texted me yesterday, he’s such a creep and a weirdo”. and before you know it, everyone in the club avoids me and there’s a good chance I’d get kicked out for harassment.

 

Because I know that girls like to talk to their girlfriends about this kind of stuff so if we share a large network of people, then it could be catastrophic for my reputation since I doubt very many people are going to be sympathetic to a 25 year old grown man and the fact that I did it out of extreme loneliness.

[d0nnivain]

Exactly. That is why your plan will backfire.

 

Why not be nice to the cute girl in music class & see if she will date you. Then she will cuddle as your GF.

[LivingWaterPlease]

Another way of getting female attention would be to have a female hair dresser and get your hair shampooed and styled each week. And get a real massage from a lady.

 

My massage therapist and I always talk while I'm getting worked on and she feels somewhat like a friend.

 

I was talking to a guy who was telling me recently how his hair dresser knows his history with his ex wife because he always talks with her when she cuts his hair. I can imagine that would be a good tactile experience, too.

[Garcon1986]

You will face retaliation or even being kicked out of the club if you attempt to solicit a member of the school club that you know. Just like you said, women talk to other women about creepy guys, and you’ll get an extremely bad reputation very quickly.

 

If you must pay a woman to be intimate with you, it is better to do it in a place where this is accepted, like the club.

 

If you are on the other hand, willing to listen to rational advice, it will be very informational if you try to sit down with a girl who is medium on the attractiveness scale and has so so social skills, and chat with her about what she likes at your school club. That way, there is less pressure to perform well, and you will not have a woman with extremely refined social skills judging you at every turn. I was in your position in 2012, as a brand new professional. At your level, chasing intimacy and sex is going to lead to rejection every single time. That is just the harsh reality of learning dating from the beginning. You will learn much more if you simply try to chase a smile, approval of your presence, and a enjoyable conversation.The reality is that most women are several years ahead of men of the same age in the social skills department, because it is an integral part of a woman’s life to be approved of by others and have a social circle. Your only way out of this conundrum is to start simple.

[anika99]

You don't have to hire a prostitute. I just googled paid cuddles and a bunch of places that offer this service came up. Looks like it costs about $85/hr which isn't bad and is far better than asking someone you know.

[nospam99]

I did look into professional cuddlers but I don’t live in a super big city and the only person who offers it is a 60 something year old woman.

 

I've dated 60 something year old women who were more 'appealing' than plenty of 20-somethings. Have you checked this 'grandma' out?

[stillafool]

You don't have to hire a prostitute. I just googled paid cuddles and a bunch of places that offer this service came up. Looks like it costs about $85/hr which isn't bad and is far better than asking someone you know.

 

This is your best bet. Do you drive? You may have to travel a bit. Good luck.

[alphamale]

Sure I could break the law and try to find a street prostitute but it’s far more risky and I doubt that the quality of the service would be very good so it’s not worth it...

 

GG7, street hookers are usually strung out on drugs and/or alcohol and probably would not be good choices for cuddling...they also may rip you off. So be careful

[ZA Dater]

Really not sure what you hope to accomplish by doing this? All that's going to happen is you are actually going to feel even worse, well in my opinion anyway.

[Michelle ma Belle]

Listen, there is such a thing as Cuddle Therapy and professionals out there who do exactly (and ONLY) this for a living. It's NOT prostitution and there is nothing inappropriate taking place AT ALL. Google it and see who is located in your town. It's a legit business where Cuddlists go through training, certification, screening and licensing. I'm actually thinking of becoming one myself at some point as I know and have seen first hand the transformative power of this kind of therapy.

 

I'm not sure how much they cost but if that's what you need, then it might a good investment with someone who knows what they're doing. There is both a physical and a psychological component to it and it's best to do this with someone who understands the whole picture so they can act in your best interest.

 

As already mentioned, please do not ask any of your friends or women you meet in your daily life. Most will NOT appreciate this no matter how much you are willing to pay them.

 

Good luck.

[thefooloftheyear]

Forget that crap..

 

Instead, use the money you would have thrown away for what you are proposing and go to the local pet supply house and buy a bunch of dog and cat food...Then head to the shelter and donate the food to the animals...They'll likely even let you cuddle one of those poor dogs/cats and who knows, they'll feel better...... and so will you...

 

TFY

[alphamale]

Forget that crap..

 

Instead, use the money you would have thrown away for what you are proposing and go to the local pet supply house and buy a bunch of dog and cat food...Then head to the shelter and donate the food to the animals...They'll likely even let you cuddle one of those poor dogs/cats and who knows, they'll feel better...... and so will you...

 

TFY

 

what about just buying a dog(s)

[vla1120]

Prostitution is illegal in most parts of the country where I’m from and the only place where it’s legal is 20 hours away. If it were legal and nearby, I probably would have gone by now.

 

Sure I could break the law and try to find a street prostitute but it’s far more risky and I doubt that the quality of the service would be very good so it’s not worth it.

 

I did look into professional cuddlers but I don’t live in a super big city and the only person who offers it is a 60 something year old woman.

 

The professional cuddling has a psychological aspect to it that might be beneficial to you, regardless of the age of your cuddler. Otherwise, there are websites for people who are seeking arrangements for almost anything. You can find pretty much anything you're looking for out there.

 

Whatever you do, please don't offer to pay one of the girls at the club to cuddle with you.

 

One last thing GG7, there are 7.7 billion people in the world. Regardless of your height or the fact that you have Asperger's, there is definitely someone out there for you. In fact, there are multiple people out there for you. You just have to find them. You keep mentioning that you live in a small town. Have you ever considered relocating to an area with more people to increase your odds of connecting with someone?

[normal person]

No offense, but this has got to be your worst idea yet. I'm sure you already have a reputation for being "creepy" as you've detailed all the girls you ask out blindly to no avail. Why do you need to add what could, in these strange times, easily be construed as something akin to a sex offense your resume? Before everyone calls me crazy, here are some recent cases of boys with autism (or who are just awkward) not knowing boundaries and being ostracized or worse for it:

 

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/autism-chattanooga-east-ridge-elementary-united-states-nathan-a9119391.html

 

https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/2019/08/239582/travis-barker-daughter-alabama-graham-sierota-echosmith

 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7606833/Shy-awkward-student-told-pay-250-schoolgirl-touched-arm-waist.html

 

Don't be surprised if whoever you ask tells all her friends and turns you into a pariah overnight.

 

but I still want to know what it's like

 

If this whole thing is just a case of morbid curiosity, save yourself the embarrassment. It's literally just lying down next to someone. It's not worth the risk, and certainly not worth $40.

 

to experience intimacy

 

Paying someone to do this isn't going to allow you to experience "intimacy" it's going to "allow" you the experience of giving your money away to someone who likely pities and doesn't respect you -- that's pretty far from intimacy. There won't be anything intimate about it, and there's a very good chance you'll feel much worse afterwards having spent your money realizing she doesn't like you and nothing's changed.

 

and companionship.

 

You know, you can get companionship for free from family, friends, pets, etc and it won't be 1/1000th as risky or humiliating.

 

So I was thinking about asking some girls I know and offer them $40 to $50 to cuddle and talk with me for 30 minutes and pretend to care about me. Fully clothed, no sex, I just wanna cuddle and talk, so I can actually feel like a normal human being.

 

There are plenty of other ways you can feel like a "normal human being" without doing this and letting everyone you know think that you're basically a blossoming sex offender. You can talk to your friends, family, classmates, coworkers, etc without paying them. As soon as you do this, any credibility or benefit of the doubt that could be afforded to you will evaporate, you'll forever be known as the creepy 25 year old who wanted to pay college girls to cuddle with him. So if there's ever another misunderstanding, and there very well could be if this is the path you're own, this will not do any favors when people assess your reputation and history.

 

Even if you have no ill intent, people may not treat you kindly. Especially if they dislike you already (which you may not be able to notice) -- they'll jump at the opportunity to have you humiliated.

 

Because I know that girls like to talk to their girlfriends about this kind of stuff so if we share a large network of people, then it could be catastrophic for my reputation since I doubt very many people are going to be sympathetic to a 25 year old grown man and the fact that I did it out of extreme loneliness.

 

Exactly. Also, being 25 and asking college aged girls for this sort of thing is going to come off beyond creepy.

 

I did look into professional cuddlers but I don’t live in a super big city and the only person who offers it is a 60 something year old woman.

 

So why not use her, if you're that desperate? If this isn't anything sexual, as you insist, then what does her age matter? She probably has to get some sort of licensing and bonding to keep everything legit and to keep her and you safe from any misunderstandings or wrongdoings -- whereas all your 19 year old classmate has to do is show it to some higher up at your school and all of a sudden you've got a restraining order against you.

Edited November 8, 2019 by normal person

[Envy123]

In the end, no amount of cuddling or moving could change the fact that you need to change your attitude, GG7.

 

I've had good women chase after me for most of my life - some even kept pushing it to the point of insanity. But only if I treat them like a human being and don't expect anything in return.

 

I've been there. I asked out every girl I found attractive during my private secondary. The result? Zilch, nada, nothing. But the times when I treated every girl like a guy - there was success.

 

I have Asperger's, dyspraxia, am obese, have bad eczema on my arms - if I can have success, so can you. But you'd need to change your attitude first. No-one owes you a relationship. It's not a rite of passage. It happens when it happens.

[alphamale]

^this.....