Work supervisor

[catherine1]

Hi,

 

I have came to this forum for a bit of advice in how to deal with a supervisor at work. I work at a retail shop, and have recently been moved to another store to help this understaffed shop. I have a bachelors degree and have recently completed a masters in marketing, I am actively searching for a post uni job, and I guess I see my current job as a means to an end.

 

This supervisor and I, have got along and I could have a conversation with her about things outside of work. I thought she viewed me as someone who isn’t a child, mature (29) and someone with whom there is mutual respect. Yesterday she asked me to sort a rail of jeans out, I had been doing the tasks she gave me all day. She comes over mid way through the “Jean sorting” to ask if it was done, I replied that it was near to finish. A colleague had started a conversation with me, so the supervisor replies “it mustn’t be nearly finished if you’re talking to her!” I was shocked, I’ve seen this supervisor act like a b*tch to a younger colleague and knew she was the stricter supervisor. She looked so pleased with herself after this comment too.

 

Might I add, that was said in front a colleague and in close proximity to customers which I find unprofessional and embarrassing. I can’t help but feel that she is trying to exert dominance and prove her “one level up” from us position?

 

I just can’t accept someone speaking to me in that manner, I’m not a child and I am a good worker. My question is, how do you think I handle this supervisor? I show her respect and expect it back, I won’t accept that treatment like the other sales assistants may do.

 

Thank you

Edited November 18, 2019 by catherine1

[stillafool]

Perhaps you should have told the colleague "I'm sorry I have to finish this sorting right now, can we talk later?" If you and the other workers are on the same level position wise, she is going to treat you like she does the others regardless of your age or education. She is a no nonsense type of boss. She isn't the only one out there like that so if you don't like it you will probably have to change jobs; but you can't change her.

[catherine1]

Thank you, your points are valid but this mentality and attitude from a supervisor just brings me down. I believe this type of management does little for employee productivity and team morale. She’s an awful human

[d0nnivain]

You are probably better educated then she is so she flaunted her authority out of fear.

 

Just ramp up your job search but do not confront her. It will only make things worse

[ajequals]

At one point in time what your boss did was standard practice, employees were honed to be their best. then political correctness showed up and now feeling get hurt over the smallest things and employers are are not allowed to do what this lady did..I don't feel she saw this as disrespecting you. she inserted her values as to how her store will be run..one day when your a boss you will want to do the same I assure you

[catherine1]

At one point in time what your boss did was standard practice, employees were honed to be their best. then political correctness showed up and now feeling get hurt over the smallest things and employers are are not allowed to do what this lady did..I don't feel she saw this as disrespecting you. she inserted her values as to how her store will be run..one day when your a boss you will want to do the same I assure you

 

She had no reason to shout, my colleague started the conversation with me, it was my colleague interrupting my task. I understand your point and yes, will probably feel the same when in a higher position myself. However I believe political correctness is different from basic decency toward your colleagues. Sadly for her, the generation before her have greater expectations from the likes of her. Her subordinates will only get younger and this expectation will only become greater, if she doesn’t change she will risk losing staff and subsequently losing her job due to an inability to change management style, and a mindset which is stuck in previous years gone by.

[Mr. Lucky]

Sadly for her, the generation before her have greater expectations from the likes of her. Her subordinates will only get younger and this expectation will only become greater, if she doesn’t change she will risk losing staff and subsequently losing her job due to an inability to change management style, and a mindset which is stuck in previous years gone by.

 

You should probably get an actual management job before you begin doling out advice on motivating employees.

 

You weren’t on task and she called you on it. Doesn’t make you a bad employee any more than her an “awful human”. You’ll have more success, especially at the clerk level, if you take yourself a little less seriously...

 

Mr. Lucky

[catherine1]

You should probably get an actual management job before you begin doling out advice on motivating employees.

 

You weren’t on task and she called you on it. Doesn’t make you a bad employee any more than her an “awful human”. You’ll have more success, especially at the clerk level, if you take yourself a little less seriously...

 

Mr. Lucky

 

I think you’re missing the point. My “supervisor” was taking herself a little too seriously. I have also been a manager in another field for three years before a change in career direction, maybe you shouldn’t assume...

[Mr. Lucky]

I have also been a manager in another field for three years

 

Then I’m surprised you don’t understand managers and supervisors are more likely to relate to you on their terms than yours. The job isn’t about your feelings, it’s about sorting jeans. A thicker skin would help...

 

Mr. Lucky

[catherine1]

A Jackal and Hyde approach? Sounds excellent...

[basil67]

OK, so her response to you wasn't great, but it's hardly the worst thing which has been said by someone who's had a bad day. Even bosses are human and have reactions which aren't always perfect. Have you never spoken a snippy word out of turn? I know I have and as such, I can't chastise someone who's done the same.

 

Thing is though, as much as she was a bit snippy, it doesn't seem to match with the anger you're holding towards her.

>I won’t accept that treatment

>this mentality and attitude from a supervisor just brings me down

>She’s an awful human (really?)

> inability to change management style

 

In the wise words of Disney's Elsa, "Let it go, let it go, let it go".

[Lotsgoingon]

I'm with Basil. It's not some catastrophe to have a supervisor snap at us at work. Sure, this can be momentarily uncomfortable, but you're reacting as if she had called you ugly and reared back and slapped you.

 

BTW: having a colleague initiate a discussion is still your responsibility. You're not some kid--colleague came over to talk to you, therefore you HAD to stop.

 

You also got some key information that you want to be curious about. The boss doesn't seem to like the coworker you were talking to. Do you know the history between the person who was talking to you and your supervisor?

 

You don't want to quit a job because someone talks to you rough one day. There are some fantastic jobs out there, even fantastic bosses, who when you work with them ... will sting you every now and then. And then there are times when we just need to hang on to a job.

 

You do have a voice by the way, and this is a perfect time to practice. "Mary (making up supervisor's name) you know I'm good for getting the work done. I'll be done in a second."

 

Your options were more than just take it ... and put up with the "abuse"... or curse her out and quit and all that. There's a wide middle ground. "Hey Mary, I was talking to X for five minutes. I'll be done soon."

 

Dude, you're going to need to speak up for yourself in the middle ground throughout all areas of life, including dating, marriage, creating friendships and on and on.

 

You can politely defend yourself. That's quite allowed. And let me tell you ... even speaking up for yourself in a gentle way ... feels really good.

Edited November 19, 2019 by Lotsgoingon

[CC12]

I show her respect and expect it back, I won’t accept that treatment like the other sales assistants may do.

 

The only way, and I mean the ONLY way for you to not accept that treatment from a supervisor is to find another job. Seriously. You will not change anyone's management style, ever, and any attempt to will only make things worse for you. If this were a career-type job that you plan to have for the next five years, or if you had no other prospects, then maybe there's something to be done. But you're just there until you find something better.

 

So stop caring. Demanding boss? Whatever, just do what they say. Micromanager? Whatever, just do what they say. An *******? Whatever, just do what they say. Unprofessional and embarrassing? Whatever, just do what they say.

 

You're not going to change anything in your short time there, and it's not even worth your effort.

 

Also, it's a little bit of practice for when you do get a good, career-type job - you'll still have to listen to managers who are stupider than you.

[Inspire]

On 11/19/2019 at 3:52 AM, CC12 said:

 

The only way, and I mean the ONLY way for you to not accept that treatment from a supervisor is to find another job.

 

This right here. More often then not people leave their current job because of a bad relationship with their direct supervisor(s).

At one point or another we've all said things that came out the wrong way and we've all been on the receiving end of that kind of exchange. My advice to you is to brush it off and let it go. It's a job with a means to an end and there isn't a point to rock the boat over a little scuffle.

Throughout your career you're going to encounter people that probably shouldn't be in the role they're in, or should be a little kinder with their words but the reality is you either move on or develop thicker skin. I can tell you that the higher up you go the thicker the skin you'll need to have.

[Foxhall]

Yes Catherine I would empathise with you on this, it seems purely a matter of her throwing her weight around and showing who is boss more so than having anything to do with the efficient running of the store,

lol I am probably a sensitive type but I would not take kindly to that type of remark coming in my direction,

 

As a result I have gravitated towards roles where I am more or less my own boss and do not have to answer to many people, that being said I get insulted every day now in adult education, but I dont care, because at the end of the day I have the qualifications that these people do not have.

 

It has always been the way of the world I suppose, a hierarchical structure and the notion of some people being the superiors of others and so on,

 

I have never bought into this and have been categorised as "being different" as a result,

 

You should bring it up with her, ask her to not speak to you again in that manner in front of other staff and customers, if she has an issue to speak privately to you about it.

Edited December 9, 2019 by Foxhall

[preraph]

You're going to have to toughen up if being corrected by your manager seems unreasonable.  It's called being an employee.  "Nice" managers get run over and taken advantage of, as a rule.  This isn't your teacher or your mom.  This is your boss.  She sounds about standard.