Boundary issue

[preraph]

You could check your state laws. Most states do not count as cheating when they are assessing division of property in a divorce. Especially since there are no kids. 

 

But here's my best advice. Waiting until all my messy divorce stuff is over, because while you might find the thought of a new woman comforting, the reality is that it will only cause more complications and more confused feelings. If you latch on to a new woman before you have really dealt with legally and emotionally fallout from this divorce, at some point you will just feel like you have jumped from the frying pan into the fire. It won't be fair to the woman either. once your divorce you will be wanting to get out of that relationship and be free, and that's not fair to someone who stuck with you through a difficult and uncertain time that would make her very insecure and anxious. 

 

And you won't be emotionally ready. It will just scramble your brain. 

 

So do first things first and do things one at a time so you don't get overwhelmed and in over your head. 

[fishlips]

Agreed, your crazy wife will use it against you if you date someone before you are divorced.

 

OP, I have a 15 yo and a 17 yo. My 17 year old is autistic, and while I coddle him, it's nothing near as bad as what you've written about your wife and her son. She has an unhealthy relationship with the boy, and is doing him no favors. Her 15 yo sounds like a spoiled brat as well.

 

I think you are doing the smart thing by getting out, since your wife doesn't seem to want to work this out.

[Chesty]

18 hours ago, fishlips said:

Agreed, your crazy wife will use it against you if you date someone before you are divorced.

 

OP, I have a 15 yo and a 17 yo. My 17 year old is autistic, and while I coddle him, it's nothing near as bad as what you've written about your wife and her son. She has an unhealthy relationship with the boy, and is doing him no favors. Her 15 yo sounds like a spoiled brat as well.

 

I think you are doing the smart thing by getting out, since your wife doesn't seem to want to work this out.

 

[Chesty]

Filed  for divorce now 60:day waiting period to finish this nightmare.  Saw my counselor yesterday and expanded on some of stuff soon to be ex wife and her son do ie he likes to pat her on the butt while playing basketball and they both smile when he does, how he puts his feet up on her chair with his foot in her groin and she lets him do it... she said she is in the process of contacting CPS... maybe justice will be served.

Edited December 19, 2019 by Chesty

[vla1120]

Good news, Chesty. Her behavior goes way beyond closeness or coddling. It's downright inappropriate.

[fishlips]

Yes, it's time to get CPS involved. I don't necessarily think nudity is a big deal, since it's not always sexual and it depends on one's culture, how they were raised, etc. Inappropriate touching is different, though. It sounds like that boy needs to get away from his mother.