Would this make any difference?

[an0nym0us123]

Hi folks, ive had several threads on here about how i am un able to find a relationship. Basically i was using dating apps to meet people, im in a remote ish location and it seemed the easiest way to meet single women. Despite meeting a number of women from them and several were showing high levels of interest it all fizzled to nothing. I have been out on several nights out recently and chatted to several women at the bar etc, basically a watse of time, either they were only being friendly or already attached.

 

Im 33, in shape, run a small business and make a decent enough living. Over the course of my life i have had a number of attractive women chase me. It confuses me no end that putting myself out there has basically resulted in nothing.

 

Its something i never mention to women, but i own property, land and equipment that is used for my business which is worth close to a million pounds. Ive no mortgage or debt so despite being average income i am quite well off, asset wise at least.

 

Okay so my plan at the moment is to try and expand my business darasticly, and to forget about perusing women online or in real life because it appears to be a pointless waste of time.

 

The hope would be that maybe in 5 years time, id be making a lot more money, be well known locally as someone who got somewhere in life and might finally be able to get and keep someones attention. Of course this would basically be women coming after me for money rather than me. And it might back fire and i end up bust but its a gamble im considering taking.

 

Any thoughts?

[preraph]

I think maybe dating random women isn't your best approach. Since you are well set up financially, seems like you should start being very involved in your community, or if you're very remote, greater community. Attend political fundraisers and any community functions so you build a bigger network of people, many of whom may also be successful. Volunteer some way for local fire department or police or church to help with toy drives, etc. Maybe become a donor to your local animal shelter or a volunteer. Go to city council meetings if you want and just raise your profile. You meet a better bunch of people with something more on their minds than how well the guy on the dating site texts.

[Foxhall]

well it might be no harm to take the pressure off yourself in terms of meeting women,

 

you could look at it you are time enough getting a woman by the time you are 40, so what is the panic now,

 

perhaps your anxiousness to find a woman is coming across and putting them off.

 

enjoy yourself I would say, and importantly keep chatting to women, it is fun to chat to women, but do not be too bothered about meeting someone for the time being.

 

I dont see why improving your financial situation will make that much of a difference in terms of attracting women, if you already have a few assets to your name then that aspect would not seem to be a problem.

 

expanding a business drastically, do you need to put that extra stress on yourself.

[mark clemson]

If you're a decent catch and the remote living situation is the issue, can you move close to a large urban area where there will be lots of women around? If possible, that would probably help.

[d0nnivain]

The part that jumped out at me is that you run a small business. I met my husband at a business networking event. So I will encourage you to do more personal marketing for your business. Attend Chamber of Commerce events, business card exchanges, entrepreneurial workshops, SBDC events, etc.; join a BNI or LeTip group. You will meet an interesting, engaging group of people. Part of finding a good person to date is widening your circle. If you can kill 2 birds with 1 stone -- build your business & your social network -- but claim the costs of attending as an above the line marketing expense all the better.

[chillii]

lf you've had women chase "you" what happen to them btw ?

Anyway , l'm uncomfortable at sinking yourself into work at your age , few others round here did that and now later 30s they're even more stuck. Seen it with women to sinking time into careers instead around those ages.

Funny thing , by later 20s l had a business and was pretty well off too , and l had the first 3yr drought ever, in my life, go figure but then l met my w 4yrs later.

l wasn't sinking it into business at the time though, l'd was doin nothn for 18mths just playin round on the hobby farm l bought.

You know, someone special isn't about money or what we have it's connection .

Personally l;d say just live and do whatever's in your heart, rather than ulterior motives. You've done well , go enjoy, and who knows what will happen.

[SumGuy]

I’d say use your resources to get a good dating coach and perhaps a place closer to a more populated area. No idea the kind of woman you’re interested in but if you have all that then if you can interact well, make women laugh, intrigue them, and put them at ease the world should be your oyster.

[an0nym0us123]

Thanks for the replies. I own a small farm, which was passed through the family. Its an asset that is worth money but i would not want to sell it. It is my own private play ground. I own my house so not tied up with a mortgage like most my age. I also run a small business on the side which i am think about trying to expand and would probably have to employ someone sooner or later.

 

So allthough im well off at the moment my income is average but fairly disposable as ive no debt or family.

 

When i was in my early 20s i had numerous women after me. I didnt really want a relationship and hooked up with a couple of them. Some were extremely attractive. My ex chased me and she was attractive.

 

Right now though i will not date any single mothers regardless of compatibility. I am a fit active guy and would like a woman to be in decent shape and someone i find attractive.

 

So far the only person i met for a few dates was a nurse and she ticked all the boxes but she didnt stick around.

[Ellener]

'Right now though i will not date any single mothers regardless of compatibility.'

 

you're at the age many women of your age will have children I guess.

 

Some of my childless friends do social groups/events with other people targetted specifically for non-parents, maybe there's a dating website too?

[preraph]

Wanting no one with children, it makes even more sense to attend groups of business people because you will find some women in there that don't have kids because they're concentrated on their careers.

[Mysterio]

Concentrating on Careers means to me making a lot of money. Thats great, but does it satisfy our soul.