Caught with Intent to follow through

[JTSW]

You didn't really have any right to confront her. 

Nor did you have any right to go into her private messages and read them all.

Definitely had no right messaging him. What were you thinking?

That's a gross invasion of her privacy.

You are separated and she can talk to or see whoever she wants.

You need to understand that everything you have done here is very wrong.

 

[Steve40th396]

18 minutes ago, JTSW said:

You didn't really have any right to confront her. 

Nor did you have any right to go into her private messages and read them all.

Definitely had no right messaging him. What were you thinking?

That's a gross invasion of her privacy.

You are separated and she can talk to or see whoever she wants.

You need to understand that everything you have done here is very wrong.

 

True, I had no right. But, the worst got me and I did it. But, it put us where we are now, filing for separation to see how things go.

Would she have told me of the EA? Probably not. Would we continue down this path of being in separate homes forever, without finally just moving on. We have been in different homes for over 2 years off and on.

But, we get along real well, see each other allot, and spend quality time with the kids. Maybe that is her goal, keep me as a friend, and not wanting to divorce to lose that. No one knows.

[JTSW]

It's not an emotional affair if you are separated.

Being friends without getting divorced is never going to work.

It'll be even more confusing for your children. 

Eventually one or both of you will meet someone and you will HAVE to get a divorce at some point.

[notbroken]

The separation is just causing more wallowing in the pain.  Separation in this case is just 'practice divorce'.  Quit practicing.  Do yourself and her a huge favor and 'pull off the band aid' and go ahead and finish the divorce.  You will both be better off than torturing yourself like you are doing now.