moissanite Posted December 16, 2019 Share Posted December 16, 2019 (edited) I'm 19, he's 25 and we had summer affair. We spend a lot of wonderful moments together, but in September he come back to the Germany... He never promised me any feelings, said that our communication is not going anywhere, because of the distance. We chating untill now. However, I do not understand the purpose of our communication and our status, because he is flirting with me, but don't suggest be a couple. He recently divorced with his ex due the distance, so maybe he afraid of realationship? He said that he interested in my and we are more than friends, what does it mean? Edited December 16, 2019 by moissanite Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted December 16, 2019 Share Posted December 16, 2019 It means he is trying to keep you on the hook if he ever comes back. The messages are fun but they are not binding. If you can't deal with the flirting because you prefer a committed exclusive LDR, cut off the flirting & stop talking to him. Nothing else can happen while the distance exists. Link to post Share on other sites
Author moissanite Posted December 16, 2019 Author Share Posted December 16, 2019 (edited) Maybe he doesn't want to commit because he wants to get out and decide if I'm the right person for the relationship? Edited December 16, 2019 by moissanite Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted December 16, 2019 Share Posted December 16, 2019 No honey. He has 6 years of life experience on you. You are the hot 19 year old he had a summer fling with. When he went home he ended the committed part of this. It was fun & he still enjoys talking to you / flirting with you because you stroke his ego. But he doesn't want an LDR & you can't expect him to be faithful. He refuses to do the distance & you can't make it. I suppose if geography wasn't an issue, maybe this thing would run it's course & you could have dated conventionally for longer but since that is not the reality there is no sense pining about it. What are you going to do, move to where he is & throw all the pieces of your life up in the air? How will you support yourself? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author moissanite Posted December 16, 2019 Author Share Posted December 16, 2019 (edited) I think that we should try realtionship from distance and see how it goes.. Its seems that he doesn't want to let feelings in himself... Edited December 16, 2019 by moissanite Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted December 16, 2019 Share Posted December 16, 2019 I understand you want to try but he has already said he does not want to try so there is nothing you can do 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted December 16, 2019 Share Posted December 16, 2019 Best thing you can do is to bow out and let him go. If you keep in touch one day he will tell you he is dating someone else... and that will be very hard for you to hear. Most people just do not want to enter into a long distance relationship, it is difficult to keep the "love" alive, when there is no physical connection. You had a lovely summer, made some nice memories...leave it there. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted December 16, 2019 Share Posted December 16, 2019 44 minutes ago, moissanite said: I think that we should try realtionship from distance and see how it goes.. Its seems that he doesn't want to let feelings in himself... He's already told you that this isn't going anywhere so why don't you believe him. He is telling you exactly what he means so it's best to stop reading more into it. If he is recently divorced it's doubtful that he will want a relationship with another woman for quite some time. However he does want sex and will get it from other women he meets. He will also have sex with you again when he comes back to your country and that is why he flirts (to keep the irons hot) but he will not commit to you. You have to decide if that is enough for you at 19. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Kaarek Posted December 31, 2019 Share Posted December 31, 2019 I would personally advise you to avoid LDRs like plague if you want to keep your sanity and hopes about Relationships in general positively. Best Regards 🙂 Link to post Share on other sites
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