mortensorchid Posted December 22, 2019 Share Posted December 22, 2019 TOnight I got a phone call from an old friend of mine, we hadn't spoken in 8 years. He and I met because we were fans of a rock band overseas, we met for a few fan meetings we would have once a year. In 2005 I hosted the fan meeting in my city, then he decided he would host it in his hometown and called me to pick my brain on how to host the party. From there, we used to talk every Sunday night for years and years. We were best friends, he told me everything and I told him everything. Things changed quite a bit as the economy crashed and we both had a lot of problems - I went through a ton of jobs, he got involved with a woman who is borderline psychotic. He stopped answering the phone or responding to texts, he later told me his gf was jealous and she would go through his phone and email and whatever else looking for signs he was cheating. And he accused him of cheating with me even though we live thousands of miles apart. He went back to his gf after how many times they broke up and got back together, then we didn't speak for years. I still had his number in my phone and I would text him once or twice a year saying I missed him. Last week I texted him a holiday wish and I hope he's okay. He said he would call me, and he did tonight. He said he still lives with his psycho gf and her 3 adult kids who he's supporting. He is supporting all of them and he's depressed since he put on about 40 lbs since last I saw him. I said I am sorry to hear this. He said he's going to kick out the gf and her kids (yeah, right) after 8 years because he is almost 60 and doesn't have the energy to raise another family at his age (his kids are adults and moved away). He sounded depressed and drunk. I said I was sorry but I was glad to hear from him after all these years and that I knew someday, somehow he would come back. I don't know how I feel right now. I am happy to hear from him again but we're not going to be as tight as we used to be. Hopefully it will be okay for him. Link to post Share on other sites
LivingWaterPlease Posted December 22, 2019 Share Posted December 22, 2019 Sometimes it's not easy for friendships to evolve but most do, it seems. Though your R with him isn't quite the same as it once was at least he cared enough to contact you. From what you wrote it sounds as if he conveyed to you that he feels trapped. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mortensorchid Posted January 18, 2020 Author Share Posted January 18, 2020 Since we reconnected I would text him once in a while, plus I called him once or twice in the hopes that we would talk again. Last night he texted me after I had left a voicemail on his phone not to call or text him anymore because his gf will go through his phone. I texted him back "you both deserve each other". Eight / nine years the two of them have been together, she does nothing but take advantage of him and use him and cause problems and he stays with her. I thought we were going to rebuild but no such luck. I blocked him on my phone so that he will never contact me again. I am having a cry this morning. Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted January 18, 2020 Share Posted January 18, 2020 Yep, you absolutely don't want to have anything to do with someone who has to hide your friendship. Yuck. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted January 18, 2020 Share Posted January 18, 2020 Textbook stuff. Guy in a bad relationship, starts looking up old gfs, ex wives, old friends,. old acquaintances, old coworkers, etc. etc. in order to form a connection and acquire a OW or a FWB or someone to monkey branch onto... Here you took the bait, but he got scared that his gf would find out,,and thus cut you off. Link to post Share on other sites
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