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Why do younger guys like to hook up with older women where older guys like younger women?


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On 12/25/2019 at 9:05 AM, elaine567 said:


The women I knew who deliberately sought out older guys for ,realtionships, were either "hot" gold diggers using their youth to snare a rich older guy or they were "strugglers" desperate to find a man, any man and a older guy was easier to get.

LOL! Young women have been doing this forever to get their rent paid, car note, etc., even in college girls would seek out older guys to get a steak dinner.  Well you know what May sees in December don't you - Santa Claus!

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When I was 19-20 I had a relationship with a woman who was nearly 40 and recently divorced. We had the best times together. The sex was terrific. She knew what she liked and taught me how to please her. She knew how to push all my buttons and taught me some very valuable lessons ( about life). 

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On 12/22/2019 at 6:22 AM, Metsgal said:

Seems like younger guys (ages 20-28) are into older women, but only when it comes to hooking up/causal fling, where older men probably around 35 and older are into younger women in their 20's for obvious reasons. Like the whole young guy =older women kind of goes back to that school boy crush for the "hot" older teacher that type of thing. But is only for sex , not for like anything serious EVER. I mean, its not socially acceptable for a young guy to even commit to a woman who is 12-18 years older than him. Where older men 40 plus will most likely marry the 22 year old woman. Does anyone else see that? And no body else has a problem with it. Men will always have the upper hand

Wouldn't say men have the upper hand. 

Our fertility years are longer, and if we work on ourselves we can hit our peak in later years.  However, a young woman in the prime of her fertility can get sex anytime she wants.  That's a power most men will not experience.  Nature always addresses the balance though, and a woman's fertility peak is a lot shorter than a mans.  Though an older woman who has worked on herself, can also be very attractive.

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Easy....older women are sexually mature, uninhibited and know what they want. Young guys like that aggression/confidence. For older men, they like innocence of younger women, and to dominate...feeds the ego.

Edited by smackie9
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I'm sure the comments about the more desperate younger guys may be reaching out to older women are true in some situations, but I can tell you that in my situation it was not true at all.  The one I had the 10-year thing with was gorgeous and got press, won an early national band competition and got a record deal out of it. He had plenty of women interested in him. We just really liked each other.

 

Another one that I did date was similar, in a local band, but we just didn't date very long and ended up friends. 

I didnt date most of the ones who were interested in me because of the age gap. So they were more like fanboys of the music scene. 

There has just never been a time when I was interested in someone beta. Well there was one and he turned out to be gay and we never slept together and were killing time with each other for quite a while as buddies and as his beard.  He looked like a young Pierce Brosnan so there was nothing wrong with his looks, but he was very beta, so beta he couldn't even admit to himself that he was gay. 

When I was 50, I had one very young male stalker who quit as soon as I told him to quit following me. Now, I know he had some problems. He was just some guy that worked at an auto shop where I had gone for brakes, and he was assigned to drive me home and I could tell he had a miserable childhood. But I wasn't at all interested in him and when I found out he was following me I told him to stop and he did. 

Also when I was 50, a cute young guy who worked in a Italian restaurant tried to ask me out on Valentine's day. I told him how old I was and then we just sat down and talked like friends after that. I still get the warm and fuzzies thinking about that. He was sweet, and half my age. I think he was kind of shy but he was really good looking. I told him I'd seen coeds giving him the eye when they were in the restaurant and that he needed to start asking them out. but it was a nice Valentine's day because of him and wouldn't have been otherwise. 

 

Edited by preraph
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2 hours ago, preraph said:

When I was 50, I had one very young male stalker who quit as soon as I told him to quit following me. Now, I know he had some problems. He was just some guy that worked at an auto shop where I had gone for brakes, and he was assigned to drive me home and I could tell he had a miserable childhood. But I wasn't at all interested in him and when I found out he was following me I told him to stop and he did.

Here's link to a video that reminds me of the stalker thing. Part of the story in the Vid was scary, part was hilarious,...I think you will enjoy it. The guy worked in sea going shipping.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3p0XUaFmhCY

 

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I watched it. That poor girl. I think the part they sometimes leave out about stalkers is that the really bad ones are just delusional. 

Now buried in that email was the information that he got a head injury and neurological damage from his job, so that particular stalker may actually have an excuse. Head injuries can really change your behavior and keep you from having filters and boundaries. 

 

The story on that young guy who started stalking me is kind of sad and I really felt bad for the guy because I think he was just really lonely and hadn't had very many people at all be nice to him. 

 

He gave me a ride home from the auto shop in his custom painted some kind of little car that you would normally not hot rod up. So it was all custom painted loudly and it sounded like a hot rod. I'm kind of a car person so I asked him about it and he said he did it himself. I complimented him and told him he did a good job. I can't remember the content but he made some comments about his parents that made me realize they were really abusive and critical of him. 

 

So basically he latched onto me because I was kind to him and gave him a little validation about having some talent and being worth something. He was just a young kid maybe at the oldest mid twenties. I was approximately 50. 

 

So I started hearing his car go by my house because as I said it was kind of loud, and I would look up the street and see his wildly painted little car. Then one day I was standing in line at McDonald's and turned around and he was right behind me and that's when I told him, Don't follow me, and told him how old I was. I really felt bad for even having to say something to him. I don't consider him a typical stalker, but I am very much against stalking and I've had experiences with it before directly and indirectly and I just wasn't going to entertain it at all. But he stopped. A real bad stalker wouldn't have stopped probably. 

 

 

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4 hours ago, preraph said:

I'm sure the comments about the more desperate younger guys may be reaching out to older women are true in some situations, but I can tell you that in my situation it was not true at all.  The one I had the 10-year thing with was gorgeous and got press, won an early national band competition and got a record deal out of it. He had plenty of women interested in him. We just really liked each other.

Another one that I did date was similar, in a local band, but we just didn't date very long and ended up friends. 

I didnt date most of the ones who were interested in me because of the age gap. So they were more like fanboys of the music scene. 

Being in and around the music business in its heyday and with all the young women throwing themselves at band members, were there many older women throwing themselves at Rock stars as well or was it just the younger groupies?  

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Oh, all types, but only the young pretty ones got past security or their personal manager unless the woman would have a reason to be there. I did hear about an older woman who was a label hub manager got drunk and go try to get invited into this really hot guy's hotel room. She was already roaring drunk at dinner because I was there and she was acting weird even then. 

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I had a young boyfriend before. It was all good, ya know. I taught him not to be stupid 

It went on for 3 years. Then he wanted to marry me. Bought me a diamond ring and everything. When I said no he eventually tried to kill me twice. Why yes I did go back after the first time he tried  (see why above^).

Anyway, It all ended innocently enough. We were in the grocery store buying beer and he asks me to buy him some candy. Candy! All of a sudden I looked at him with different eyes like wtf was I even doing .. and I was like, “betta use your allowance!” Cause he lived at home still at 21 and sat on his ass all day while his daddy gave him money. 

True story  

 

 

 

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
removed language inapropiate for forum
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On 12/22/2019 at 1:15 PM, preraph said:

I have so many younger guys always after me. I kept all but one in the friend zone. The one I didn't leave in the friend zone we adored each other but we both knew the age gap and life goals were going to be different, but we had a 10 year acquaintance that was romantic with both of us leading our own lives at the same time.  

 

To be frank, my experience scared him. And that wasn't really the attraction. We just really liked each other. 

Oh but you only live once, so why not..

 

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The immaturity can be pretty bad on some of them. And I don't find immaturity attractive. They were more in the cute and funny category.

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  • 3 weeks later...

This is interesting. I'm in situation which deals with both a young man (24) and older man (55) pursuing the same woman (39). a little background. She came face to face with the reality that she will be turning 40. this set her off on a quest to relive her youth, which led to our love triangle. She says she doesn't want a serious relationship with him but still spends alot of time with him. However, i do think she's curious as to where it might lead.

Yet she is keeping me around for emotional and financial support. BTW, this is an issue I'm resolving right now. 

It seems she's getting the best of both worlds.

I'm wondering given my situation how will this most likely play out? who will win in the end

Any thoughts?

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16 minutes ago, JPT0918 said:

I'm in situation which deals with both a young man (24) and older man (55) pursuing the same woman (39). a little background. She came face to face with the reality that she will be turning 40. this set her off on a quest to relive her youth, which led to our love triangle.

What love triangle?
She dumped you and started seeing this other guy.
You have not had sex since she dumped you, but she comes around and taps you for lunches and groceries...
 

21 minutes ago, JPT0918 said:

I'm wondering given my situation how will this most likely play out? who will win in the end


There is nothing here for you to win.
My guess he is far too young, you are far too old.
Once she gets over her failed marriage, she will find a new guy.

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46 minutes ago, JPT0918 said:

This is interesting. I'm in situation which deals with both a young man (24) and older man (55) pursuing the same woman (39). a little background. She came face to face with the reality that she will be turning 40. this set her off on a quest to relive her youth, which led to our love triangle. She says she doesn't want a serious relationship with him but still spends alot of time with him. However, i do think she's curious as to where it might lead.

Yet she is keeping me around for emotional and financial support. BTW, this is an issue I'm resolving right now. 

It seems she's getting the best of both worlds.

I'm wondering given my situation how will this most likely play out? who will win in the end

Any thoughts?

I don't want to ignore you, but I don't want to hijack the thread with you either.   So a brief response:  I don't think that either of you will end up with her.  And nor should you with her poor behaviour.  

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It’s simply much easier for a younger guy to get consistent sex from an older woman.  Obviously this is more of a time filler to satisfy needs than a permanent relationship. 
 

That doesn’t mean a 25 year old man can’t get a 25 year old woman.  It just means that 25 year old woman is in very high demand from men of all ages,  and it takes more work.  Even a guy who is just 30 has 5 more years of a career, money and resources than the 25 year old. So that 30 year old guy probably has a higher salary.  Better car.  More mature etc 
 

I think most older guys (40-50) aren’t willing to spend time with less desirable women “just to have sex”.  Also with more means they can take their time to find and invest in  a younger woman. It’s a preference of quality over quantity. 
 

 

Edited by jeff0011
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honestly?

older women = better sex. :)

i know, i know... not ALWAYS, but usually. plus, they seem to have a better idea of what they want, and less hang ups about sex.

and more open minded about what they want, vs just doing it b/c it seem to catch the guys interest, instead of actually enjoying it.

at least, that's what i've found... in general. :)

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1 minute ago, 2BGoodAgain said:

honestly?

older women = better sex. :)

i know, i know... not ALWAYS, but usually. plus, they seem to have a better idea of what they want, and less hang ups about sex.

and more open minded about what they want, vs just doing it b/c it seem to catch the guys interest, instead of actually enjoying it.

at least, that's what i've found... in general. :)

True.  And this is all “generally speaking”. The younger girl spends a lot of time with “I never did this before!”  “I don’t want to look easy” “I don’t want to be used for sex” etc 

The older woman is like “sure.  Just come over. Do whatever you want”

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