Maldives Posted December 28, 2019 Share Posted December 28, 2019 (edited) Hey guys Went on a tinder date on Xmas a first lol and she was beautiful. Towards the end of the date her best friend joined us a gay guy which was ok nice guy . After the date I went home didn't think I'd hear from her again as she was way beautiful kept thinking she was too good for me but saw a messages from her wanting to have dinner the next night together with a love heart . I was thrilled because I really liked her and said yes. The next night tho she indicates to join her and her best friend . I turned her offer down and said that's ok you guys just go out. To be honest I was disappointed and a little confused. So my walls went up and just thought let this one go. Throughout the course of the night she would keep messaging me here and there and id just reply either with an emoji or brief response. I wasn't happy about the invitation with her friend and my head was trying to make sense of it with her mixed messages. The next day she was leaving anyway on a flight interstate. Shes not local but travels quiet a bit for work. Before her flight left she messaged me saying she was leaving and believes we will see each other again. Anyway I am weary so politely responded and wished her well with an emoji. Later that day I saw she updated her tinder description saying she's looking for friends something I'd missed before our date and for drinking friends. Anyway I haven't heard from her and I haven't reached out but it just left me in a quandary with what her intention with me was? Any thoughts? Edited December 28, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted December 28, 2019 Share Posted December 28, 2019 (edited) Hard to say. I haven't dated in quite a while (decades), but I don't think it's a stretch to say bringing a 3rd party of ANY type along is a pretty rare move (except in a few specific cultures where chaperones may be required). So don't at all blame you for becoming confused and losing interest. It may be getting a trusted 3rd party to assess you or a "tolerance" test to make sure you're not bigoted. Possibly she had a bad experience or date rape incident and so this helps her feel secure. Perhaps she wants some sort of threesome or it's just a mind game she plays out of boredom. If she's just looking for friends, maybe she brings him along to clearly demonstrate that friendship is all she wants (since it's Tinder). These are just guesses of course. The only way to know is to ask her why she's inviting him along. Edited December 28, 2019 by mark clemson 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted December 28, 2019 Share Posted December 28, 2019 Huh. They may have been actually just looking for a "third." Link to post Share on other sites
Author Maldives Posted December 28, 2019 Author Share Posted December 28, 2019 Thanks Mark glad I'm not the only one that sees at confusing lol. I will if we end up speaking again 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CAPSLOCK BANDIT Posted December 28, 2019 Share Posted December 28, 2019 (edited) Her bringing her gay friend along is fine; having an additional person to work off of, especially for the first time dinner? This is like a godsend. I cant believe you turned her down man, you just get the guy on your side and then he starts doing work for you. This was an easy win for you man, you definitely should of went. If you are on a date, as long as its not a competitor, the more the merrier in my books. In addition, most of the time the woman does not want to outright bang you when you meet because she is leery if her friends will approve or not, this is usually the only barrier if shes into you, so for her best friend to approve of you, yall would of been banging that night I guarantee it. Edited December 28, 2019 by CAPSLOCK BANDIT In addition... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Maldives Posted December 28, 2019 Author Share Posted December 28, 2019 Thx Bandit no I didn't see it or think of it like that I was too caught up in my emotions 😟 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Maldives Posted December 28, 2019 Author Share Posted December 28, 2019 (edited) Oh well lesson learnt I think it's too late now thanks Bandit that really does make sense although her tinder profile does say only looking for drinking friends but she worded it weird and I missed it before the first date before she updated her profile it something like "frd" Edited December 28, 2019 by Goodguy05 Link to post Share on other sites
fromheart Posted December 28, 2019 Share Posted December 28, 2019 Maybe she was looking for friendship, maybe a threesome. You need to make it clear to her that you are interested in her as a date. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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