I dont know what is going on. Is something wrong with me?

[Hungryhuman666]

I have been in a relationship with this girl for almost 3 and a half years now. It has been a long distance relationship. We hardly meet. We dont meet at all now. I am not saying excuses but i got into this relationship accidentally. Initially i was not interested in the relationship but she cried and became very emotional in front of me and i fell in that. She was recovering from a breakup and she was loosing herself at that time. She needed someone to hold on to at that time. I did not wanted to hurt her as she was my close friend. Thats why i said Yes to the relationship. Ever since it has all been her in the relationship. I had no space. In the initial 6 months, there was no problems because may be it was the 'honeymoon' period. I always listened to her and supported her for everything. She was happy for like 1 year. But after that things started to go wrong for me. I was loosing myself. I did not had any space in the relationship. She did not even know my personality and character. She needed a person who would listen to her and satisfy her emotional needs. But i was slowly loosing myself as i was thinking and talking about her more than me or anything else. Im lost now. I am emotionally numb right now. I think i have depersonalization disorder or something, not sure about it.  But she doesnt get it. I dont know why. Now she just curses me for not talking to her and not listening to her. She says i have changed and i cheated. What should i do? I feel like im trapped. 

[d0nnivain]

If you feel trapped, unhappy & unfulfilled in the relationship end it.  You can't stay with her just because she's afraid to be alone.  The girl sounds like she has serious co-dependency issues. 

What I don't understand though is how on earth you can need space in an LDR.  If you don't see each other, how can you lose yourself in her?  or is she trying to guilt you into some technological 24/7 thing where you are supposed to be constantly texting her, IMing her, facetiming her etc & she pouts if you don't respond instantly?  That would be a drag for anybody.  

 

[chillii]

Yeah , all of the above .

But the thing is too you've allowed yourself to go on into something that you didn't even really wanna go into in the first place, and now whatever it is has dragged on 3yrs and your still stuck in it. That's the main thing going on for you, that you didn't really want it in the first place .

Really , at this stage you've given her and been there for her more than enough , 100times more. lt's time for you start thinking about yourself and doing what's best for you now and your life . She's totally emotionally drained you and gotten enough of you.

Don't see how you have any other choice but to cut her apron strings and stop this. You badly need to just be out of it and away from it now and to be moving on and starting your own new life.  Your main real problem is that only you can be the one to do it now but it's pretty clear it is something you have to do.

 

 

 

 

 

[snowboy91]

The biggest issue I see in your post is that at no point did you say that you wanted to be in a relationship with her. It seems like you're just with her because she made the effort and you've just gone along with it. And now you're 3 years down the track and feel trapped because of it.

I know you're scared of hurting her, but that's no reason to stay in a relationship. I know it's going to hurt her, but I feel as if you've been thinking that you are responsible for making her happy - which you're not. You should be in this relationship because you want to be and she enhances your life in some way - not because you feel you have to be.

[PRW]

18 hours ago, Hungryhuman666 said:

I have been in a relationship with this girl for almost 3 and a half years now. It has been a long distance relationship. We hardly meet. We dont meet at all now.

Then you aren't in a relationship.

[smackie9]

This has run it's course....it's ok to say "I'm done", and block/delete....and have some peace.