Cookiesandough Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) 10 hours ago, NuevoYorko said: It's like asking a man for a picture in a speedo. Exactly. Not really. Guys aren’t judged on their bodies to the extent women are in dating. That would probably be seen as humorous. Edited January 12, 2020 by Cookiesandough Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 I think it's hilarious any guy thinks a woman wants to see them in a Speedo. Or to see their junk before they meet. Or thinks their junk is a turn-on visually. News flash: women aren't sitting around whacking off looking at a photo of some guy's junk. Women look at guy's faces and like a nice face probably most of all. You see a lot of guys on here who thinks being fit should be the most important thing a woman looks at because all they care about is a woman's body. But women are not usually that way. Women I know look at the overall outline of a man, proportions, and their face and hair and grooming and personality. 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Shining One Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 13 hours ago, preraph said: Well to be real, if a man is that particular that he can't tell whether she looks good enough in her clothes to look good enough out of her clothes, he's definitely too picky and it's only going to make women feel self-conscious and like the guy is a jerk. Some physical attributes are visible while fully clothed and others are not. People (both men and women) like what they like. Why does judgement over a hidden (by clothes) physical attribute make one too picky and judgement over a visible physical attribute make one not too picky? 13 hours ago, preraph said: You can get a good enough idea what someone looks like when they're dressed. There's a lot of deceptive clothing options out there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) Because no one should be that micro-focused on physical perfection! Women are not cattle at auction!!😡 Edited January 12, 2020 by preraph 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Artdeco Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 I’ve never really done OLD, but if I had to post a picture of myself on a site like that, I’d pick one that I personally like. 🤷🏼♀️ ..... not sure if it would meet the requirements of a potential suitor, but apparently there are some unspoken rules that require that one shows everything? I wouldn’t be comfortable posting a half naked pic or a bikini shot or something like that. Would that be considered “dishonest”? I’d simply avoid that for “safety” reasons. Ugh, OLD sounds really awful. 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 It’s not online dating that’s awful, it’s people who are awful OLD is just one vessel in which people use to meet Just dishing the daily positivity 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Shining One Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 7 minutes ago, Artdeco said: I wouldn’t be comfortable posting a half naked pic or a bikini shot or something like that. Would that be considered “dishonest”? I wouldn't consider this dishonest. Editing photos and deceptive clothing are dishonest. Choosing an unedited photo of yourself that you like is not dishonest. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 1 hour ago, greymatter said: Oh, great point. That’s right, in warm weather women should completely cover themselves at the risk of overheating so as not to “allow” the type of guy who would leer at women to see them. It’s definitely the fault of women who encourage disgusting male behavior when dressing lightly while exercising. Sure, they should definitely put full body swimsuit photos on a dating site for all to view, download, masturbate to and distribute at will. That will attract the kind of guy they want. 😉 I have no idea what point you are trying to make, but good attempt I guess...I dunno...You do know that there are millions of women willfully doing this on IG as we speak, right?? Whats their motivation?? TFY Link to post Share on other sites
Tamfana Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) 1 hour ago, Artdeco said: Would that be considered “dishonest”? I’d simply avoid that for “safety” reasons. Ugh, OLD sounds really awful. It isn't that bad. It sounds TERRIBLE if you're just reading LS posts about it and it's frustrating at times, but realistically that's just impatience. I've met some terrific guys on dating sites and none of my friends or dates from OLD gave off a vibe of resentment or fear about scamming. My masseuse had been in a relationship for 7 years, broke up, and fell in love with the first guy she met on Tinder. One of my best friends also found love on OLD almost 2 years ago and is preparing to move. There are many good and nice people on OLD. Edited January 12, 2020 by Tamfana 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) 2 hours ago, preraph said: Because no one should be that micro-focused on physical perfection! Women are not cattle at auction!!😡 ok...Fair enough, P...But then why is there not the same disdain for the women that are filtering out guys that aren't 6' plus.? Like you state, its not a cattle auction..Id say having that type of requirement(over 6') is the true definition of "micro focused on physical",, I think you guys are missing my point, though,... This general consensus that no man can question a woman's looks/body, but its ok for women to discount men for the same?? And I laugh my ass off at the women that say guys aren't judged for their bodies...As a guy with a conventionally good body, its been the focus of more women's attention/comments, unwanted touching etc in my life than I could ever imagine to count...Even just the other day, I had to have a routine test that involved me taking my shirt off...Ill spare you the details, but if the roles reversed (male nurse /female patient), they'd probably drag the guy out of there in handcuffs.... So please...spare me.. Bear in mind I don't think its a big deal and no skin off me,. but it is noteworthy.. If you are a woman and know that the number one complaint among guys is that the women are misrepresenting themselves, then what is the real solution answer? TFY Edited January 12, 2020 by thefooloftheyear Link to post Share on other sites
greymatter Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 7 minutes ago, thefooloftheyear said: Whats their motivation?? TFY I wouldn't be the one to ask. And I don't use IG to find photos of scantily clad women so you would know better than me. But, that is a completely different issue than women in hot climates wearing minimal clothing so they don't die of heatstroke when exercising outdoors. Getting back to photos on OLD, I don't think my post is hard to understand.. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) 10 minutes ago, greymatter said: I wouldn't be the one to ask. And I don't use IG to find photos of scantily clad women so you would know better than me. But, that is a completely different issue than women in hot climates wearing minimal clothing so they don't die of heatstroke when exercising outdoors. Getting back to photos on OLD, I don't think my post is hard to understand.. Neither do I but its pretty well understood by most people that aren't living in a cave somewhere... Where did I say it was unacceptable for women to dress appropriately when exercising in the heat?? Good for them...I don't bother with them and could care less...My only point there is that if its so horrible and intrusive a thing as some of the ladies are making it out to be, then no woman ever would leave the house dressed like that, right?? BTW, I also never stopped my car and took a picture of them all sweaty as was done to me one time from a couple of ladies driving by... TFY Edited January 12, 2020 by thefooloftheyear Link to post Share on other sites
Tamfana Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 Wait a minute, there's no "general consensus" that "no man can question a woman's looks/body." Go ahead. Question and critique all you wish. I just don't think most women care about what a stranger thinks of her appearance. That's different than saying you're not allowed. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) Oh, I am totally with you on the over six foot thing. I wrote on here (I think this thread earlier) that NONE of my friends were that way. But that was before OLD. People get on OLD fishing for their ideal. Men and women. Most people will NEVER get their ideal. Usually that person doesn't even exist that is in the heads of idealists. At some point if you want to couple up, you have to be open and willing to get to know someone before you decide if they're right for you. But we all know attraction must be there to some extent. Both men and women are misrepresenting themselves on OLD. Men lying about their ages for starters because their ideal is someone in their 20s no matter if they're 80. Edited January 12, 2020 by preraph 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 OK...so just to reiterate... If you ask guys in the street and on here, they say the number one complaint is the lack of transparency (physically) of women on OLD...That's the topic at hand... As a woman what measure do you think is appropriate to remedy this.?? Or just hope you find someone with poor vision?? I dunno really.. TFY Link to post Share on other sites
Tamfana Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 For me, don't date liars. If someone lied to you, move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) Dating is not a guarantee of anything. Men are constantly lying about their age trying to date 20-year-olds, so seems pretty even steven to me. If you make a coffee date and walk in and she's 100 pounds fatter than her photo, you turn around and leave, which is what she deserves. If a woman walks in and sees a 45 year old who put up his 30 year old photo because he genuinely thinks he hasn't aged, she should turn around and leave, because the person is either a liar or seriously deluded, and who needs that? And try to remember that people are only physically perfect on tv and in movies and animation. And also remember that what is a dealbreaker for you won't be for the next guy. But liars and deluded people, move on. Edited January 12, 2020 by preraph 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tamfana Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 People lie about all kinds of things. OLD men have lied to me about their age, education, marital status, height, politics- frankly I think there’s been a liar on every checkbox item if you add them all up. But I don’t remember because they don’t upset me. I just write them off and keep going. If they get obnoxious, which a few do, I block them. It works beautifully and makes OLD much less stressful. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SumGuy Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 5 minutes ago, thefooloftheyear said: OK...so just to reiterate... If you ask guys in the street and on here, they say the number one complaint is the lack of transparency (physically) of women on OLD...That's the topic at hand... I thought the topic at hand was women saying they are "average" body type when you find them overweight? Lack of transparency is no where near a complaint I have in OLD. Most women I'm interested in (ages 45-60) post enough photos for me to get a good enough idea. The problem is when those photos are clearly out of date and they look little like them; I find that to be a very rare occurrence though. Frankly, the number one reason a first date doesn't go to a second date for me has nothing to do with physical attractiveness. That can be there (and usually is as over 90% of the women I've met do look like there photo and are honest about their weight/shape) but I'm looking for someone to be able to talk to, hang out and do things with in addition to sex. Not sure I even have a complaint about OLD, it has worked well enough for me. I don't find it a problem if women post too little for me to get enough of an idea of them to contact them (usually it is in the profile area) as there are plenty of others who do. The deceptive ones and weird ones are small minority with the women I've met...hear far, far worse stories about the men they meet. Not so much the deception, which occurs, but the attitude of the men...a highly unattractive combination of entitlement, chip on their shoulder, neediness, and judgment as they man-explain how they've been wronged and all the wrong way women do things (of course offered with the intent of just good advice and insight into the world). It seems that women (ages 45-60) do have the short end of the the OLD dating stick; it certainly makes my dating life easy...I think I'm just baseline decent but in OLD it appears I'm a breath of fresh air and rare. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 56 minutes ago, SumGuy said: I thought the topic at hand was women saying they are "average" body type when you find them overweight? It seems that women (ages 45-60) do have the short end of the the OLD dating stick; it certainly makes my dating life easy...I think I'm just baseline decent but in OLD it appears I'm a breath of fresh air and rare. Again....Nowhere did I say anything of the kind..In fact I clearly stated I have no dog in the fight..Never used OLD and I cant see any scenario where I would need to...Sounds like a minefield of shyt,, unless the goal is easy sex...which just about every guy I know that has used it says is the only real benefit of it... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
Kitty Tantrum Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 Never really done OLD, but when ExH and I had "swingers profiles" I'd exaggerate how fat I was. Gotta LOWER the expectations so they're pleasantly surprised when you're not an actual hippo. I remember being annoyed that the options were things like "curvy" and "a few extra pounds" and "more to love." If there were a "ham planet" box, I'd have totally checked that one, in spite of "only" being 200 lbs or so with defined waist, hips, bust, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 What exactly is "deceptive clothing"? Afaik, this is the first time in centuries that the women of western civilization and many other places have shown the natural shape of their bodies at all in daily dress. Corsets, girdles, waist cinchers, bustiers, bustles, foot binding, whatever. So now a woman who will wear Spanx and a flattering bra to her job every day should just let it all hang out in OLD photos so you fellows won't feel somehow ripped off once you get her naked? Jesus. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 11 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said: What exactly is "deceptive clothing"? Wearing nothing but black or dark colors... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 3 hours ago, thefooloftheyear said: My only point there is that if its so horrible and intrusive a thing as some of the ladies are making it out to be, then no woman ever would leave the house dressed like that, right?? The difference is choice and appropriate venue. I wear swimwear when I'm going to swim. But if I was doing OLD, I wouldn't put a swimwear photo of myself because it's just crass. And I wouldn't send a swimwear shot to a man I had never met because I'd see him as crass and intrusive. As for all the women who won't date smaller than 6', what do you think their dating stats are like? My guess is that they are chronically single. The fact that they want something doesn't mean they will get it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 12, 2020 Share Posted January 12, 2020 28 minutes ago, thefooloftheyear said: Wearing nothing but black or dark colors... TFY I think that's more to do with style choice than covering body issues. Bright colours in a great cut can also pull the eye away from areas we don't want focused on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts