Long distance boyfriend just disappeared?

[BabyGhoul]

Okay, so I've been in a relationship with this guy for about 7 months now. We met on a gaming website called Steam. I'm 22 and he's 35. He lives in Canada and I live in the United States. So throughout our whole relationship I have caught him in some lies.

Like i purchased him some Christmas gifts and he said he'd send me some back but lied. He's lied about his living situation before. He said he lived by himself but I found out not that long ago that he lives with his mother. Like one of the biggest ones was his age. He originally he told me he was 26 but I did some Facebook digging and found out his true age, which is 35.

Not a big deal.  I confronted him on it and he got all depressed and disappeared on me for a day. I called his house and spoke to him and asked him to get back online to talk to me because he stayed offline for a whole day after I asked him why he lied about his age. He came back on and told me that he lied because he was embarrassed. I forgave him, but ever since then I've had trust issues with him.

He has said throughout our entire relationship that he doesn't talk to other females and that I"m the only girl he talks to. I had a dream the night before he disappeared, of him cheating on me, I asked him about it when he woke up.

I asked him about if he found other women attractive and if he'd ever cheat or if he had cheated and he said "well I can't not think other people look good". When I repeated what he said after that he got angry and said that he never said that and kept gas lighting me saying that I was "just hearing things" or "imagining things", when I literally heard him say that.

He kept saying that he would never say something like that and that I was stupid for thinking such a thing.  So out of anger, I said "if you don't stop gas lighting me then I don't know if I can do this anymore." Then he replied with "well I can't listen to you whining anymore". Then he hung up our skype call and got offline and hasn't been online since.

This was yesterday around 3:30 pm and now its the next day at 6:58 pm as I type this. He's been gone for a whole day. I called his house phone and someone picked up but as soon as I said " Hello?" they hung up. I feel like it was him that picked up. I'm honestly so devastated and depressed. We have fought before and he has left before to have time to himself but never for this long. I honestly don't know what to do.

Do you think this is his way of breaking up with me? I have literally no way in contacting him because I don't have his cellphone number or address. Whenever I asked about those things before he always ignored my requests, but he has my cellphone number and address. I don't know what to do anymore...

I feel like he never truly loved me...it's honestly making me very suicidal because I can't imagine  my life without him...will he ever come back? I've apologized countless amounts of times on skype and everywhere else that we message on.

I've tried calling his house number amounts of times..Please help..thank you..

Edited January 20, 2020 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[d0nnivain]

Yes it's his way of breaking up with you.  He has limited social skills & would never become a real BF to you.  It's unlikely that you would ever even meet.  A lying 35 year old who lives with mommy is not a good prospect.  Give up on him.  Go back to playing your game.  In the future date local guys you can actually spend time with in person.  

Do not commit suicide over the likes of him.  You can do much better.  Just go out into the real world.  

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

It is funny, because people who meet through online gaming, have this idea that they can just have a relationship because they both game... Well OK, but if you have nothing else in common other than gaming, then what is the point?

A guy who is 35 and lives with his mom in Canada, is likely on AISH or Assured Income for the Severely Handicapped... This means, through legitimate or illegitimate means, he is claiming a condition that renders him incapable of working. Maybe he maintains a job, but to keep somebody like yourself, a 22 year old woman, engaged in an LDR for this long, he must have a lot of time on his hands.

Maybe he does work, I don't know, but I do know it takes time to keep up an LDR and if he could better use his time to get out of his bad living situation, but instead is using that time to have an LDR with a 22 year old woman, I mean, a guys gotta have priorities.

I don't ever meet the people I game with for this reason... I play on Steam as well, my username is the name of a city in my area, so local people will immediately recognize me and add me to play, but I just do that for s***s and giggles, I usually have no intention of meeting anybody from online gaming... The relationship does not translate well from online to off... From offline to online is fine, but online to offline is definitely a struggle at times.

Edited January 20, 2020 by CAPSLOCK BANDIT
Correction.

[Fred4550states]

TL; DR

 

Have you considered using paragraphs?

[ExpatInItaly]

Forget this man, OP. Yes, this is his way of breaking up with you, and even though you can't see it now, it's for the best. This isn't a relationship. It's a toxic dependency filling some type of void in your life and it's dreadfully unhealthy for you. 

It should be a big deal that he has lied so much. You know very little about him, it seems, and can't really even be sure that what he has now admitted to is true. It is very concerning that you don't have his cell phone number, and consider this person your boyfriend. I have to wonder if he's got a girlfriend or wife and is hiding you from her. There are certainly some indicators of serious deception on his part. 

I don't mean to be insensitive, but you really could use professional help if this is making you feel suicidal. Do you have close family or friends you can talk to? 

[2BGoodAgain]

he sounds very immature, socially.

i'd stay away. i realize you may be attached to him, but he's not good for you.

he started out lying, b/c if he just wanted to game, he'd say he was 35 and wouldn't care. he lied, so he could talk free with girls who are usually much younger than 30's on steam. or that's his target age demographics.

anyway, i know this sucks that he's ghosting you, but honestly, do you want to have a relationship with someone like that? pretty unstable too.

move on, girl. I"m sorry. Good luck!