enchanted771 Posted January 20, 2020 Share Posted January 20, 2020 I am seeing red flags fly everywhere.. he isn’t my boyfriend, but we’ve known each other a year and I sleep in the same bed as him, talk daily, etc...Lately, we have been spending a lot of time together and I saw that his behavior improved, and he cut back on the drinking.. the other day I came over and the friend that he cut off that Is a trigger was over and my heart sank.. I saw his behavior get bad, he lashed out at my child over something petty and I left. I tried to call him today to talk to him, but he’s not responding to texts or taking calls.. which this was his behavior before. He would ignore me 1 sometimes 2 days and revealed later he was depressed.. I get that but how long does it take to reply to a text? More than likely, he’s back to drinking during the week And has fell off the wagon. I won’t bring my child around him anymore either.. I feel that he’s jealous of him, Is controlling, and I’m seeing some very bad behaviors Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 20, 2020 Share Posted January 20, 2020 You’re asking the wrong question. You should have never allowed yourself to engage in such a situation in the first place. You admit there are red flags flying but you’re still choosing to be blind. I’m sure the flags didn’t just appear since you said he was improving. If you can’t make the healthy choice of removing yourself from a toxic person and situation, then your son should be motivation enough to push you to completely sever ties with this guy. Your son should have never been exposed to this. If anything, you’re teaching him that this is how women should be treated and worst of all, this is what relationships between a man and woman should look like. Not forgetting exposing him to this alcoholic and his drinking habits. Cut contact and stop trying to reach out to him. He has nothing to give you and you should not want anything from him. You’ve negotiated yourself into a position of being utilized for a year. And alcohol will always take precedence over you. Aim higher for yourself and your child. Create better boundaries. Raise your standards. Start focusing and determining what you truly deserve rather than settling. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
scooby-philly Posted January 22, 2020 Share Posted January 22, 2020 Accept and love a person for who they are NOW. Not who they were, who they might be, or who you THINK THEY ARE. No one of good quality threatens a child. Ever. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
JPT0918 Posted January 22, 2020 Share Posted January 22, 2020 He's giving you the silent treatment to punish you. Don't fall for it. People like this are wired differently and don't change. IS this the life you want? begging for the bread crumbs her provides? moving on will hurt for awhile, but it will get better the longer you stay away from him. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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