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Question - Can you ever know someone fully?


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No.  Because people are ever-changing and because people rightly keep some things to themselves in the way of boundaries and filters.  Would you want to know every negative thought a loved one had about you?  

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Kitty Tantrum

Well, no. That would literally require that you cut them open and familiarize yourself with everything that's on the inside. You can't do that to a living person.

Sounds extreme - but the point is that no, you can't ever "access" 100% of a person in any sense without doing enough damage to basically destroy them. Physically, psychologically, emotionally. People are distinct from one another. To actually know someone the same way you know yourself would necessarily require that you tear down that distinct personhood.

My ex-husband tried!

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1 hour ago, Johnhihix said:

Can you ever know someone fully (as in, 100%)?

Yes, but you'll never know if you really do :) 

In most cases no, and I think that can be good as there is always something to learn.

I certainly think you can know someone fully in the ways that really matter.

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1 hour ago, carhill said:

If they're there holding your hand when you die, you can presume to have known them well enough.

Unless it is like that Rick & Morty episode :) 

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Since human beings are complex organisms with limited senses, the answer is we cannot ever fully know someone.

Edited by 5x5
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the adventurer personality type (mine) says "one can be surprised at the secrets they keep"

in real life I tend to be a bit mysterious and to not always show my hand, keep people guessing,

that might make me difficult in some way to get to know but I definitely open up more with people I am comfortable with,

I would say I am good at reading and understanding other people, but to know anyone 100% I am not that good😊

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On 1/24/2020 at 3:17 PM, Johnhihix said:

Can you ever know someone fully (as in, 100%)?

To know someone fully you would have to be present or participate in every single scenario life can throw at the two of you.

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I don't think it's possible. For a start, people are always changing, and by the time you try to get to know them fully, they've changed again.

Secondly - not many people even know themselves 100%, and the version they show to others (not always consciously) is only a part of who they are.

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People change , and they cover up , or just go along with things and pretend until something better comes a long, hence the bomb drop expression , in divorces and such. So in one angle , you can only ever know someone even your own wife or husband , as much as they'll allow and be 110% honest about everything, but unfortunately even after 20 or 30 yrs , they could be stewing and plotting and covering, happens every day.

Personally l think it's a beautiful thing knowing someone your partner w of h , better than anyone else on the planet , but it'll always still be nice finding surprises and unknowns to, just not the wrong kind.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by chillii
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On 1/24/2020 at 3:17 PM, Johnhihix said:

Can you ever know someone fully (as in, 100%)?

No, probably not. 

But have you ever felt like you’ve known someone too well? That’s no fun either. Feels like the mystery is gone. 

Sometimes, familiarity breeds contempt. 

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