elaine567 Posted January 27, 2020 Share Posted January 27, 2020 He asked if you wanted to meet for coffee, after 2 months of gifs. My guess it took him a lot of courage to ask you and he decided to make it seem like no big deal, in case you got scared off by a formal date request. Nonchalance. This is a guy you already blew off and now you have done it again... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted January 27, 2020 Share Posted January 27, 2020 I am not seeing the big deal with his request. It was a Sunday and he asked what you were up to. You said you were going to the mall, which can imply a fairly unstructured afternoon into which a meet over coffee could possibly fit. If you had any interest in this guy, why not just go or, at a minimum, offer a different day? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 27, 2020 Author Share Posted January 27, 2020 4 hours ago, elaine567 said: He asked if you wanted to meet for coffee, after 2 months of gifs. My guess it took him a lot of courage to ask you and he decided to make it seem like no big deal, in case you got scared off by a formal date request. Nonchalance. This is a guy you already blew off and now you have done it again... I thought : "coffee"? who drinks coffee late evening? (after shopping it will be late. I said I am heading out..I can't just turn back home and meet him instead?) why can't he say drink instead? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 27, 2020 Author Share Posted January 27, 2020 9 hours ago, d0nnivain said: A last minute spur of the moment request for coffee is not something I would have rearranged plans for but if you were at all interested in meeting him, I would have offered an alternate date, negotiated the mutually convenient time & place then gone about my weekend business at 7pm, I texted:"another day? Monday? Tuesday?" "next Saturday I am going to USA, so no more mobile data"" and then sent a eating gif. No response! then I texted that I saw the bad news of famous NBA player and he responded quickly in agreement This noon he sent an affectionate gif again! I haven't responded with another gif! didn't he see my suggestion? !? what should I do now? asking again? going to USA for 11 days. I don't wanna pay extra bucks per day in the usa to use mobile data, just so I can send him a gif per day. texting use mobile data not wifi. Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 I might if I had free time and wanted to get some coffee. But this would never happen because there is no way I would spend 2 mo talking to someone without a date planned in advance having happened much earlier. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 41 minutes ago, Springsummer said: I thought : "coffee"? who drinks coffee late evening? (after shopping it will be late. I said I am heading out..I can't just turn back home and meet him instead?) why can't he say drink instead? Do you know that you don't have to drink coffee on a coffee date? You can order a drink of any kind. 1 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 28, 2020 Author Share Posted January 28, 2020 OK, why can't he just said drink? anyway, WHY he is not responding to my suggestion now but sending me gif again??? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 28, 2020 Author Share Posted January 28, 2020 (edited) I don't know what's the deal now. Maybe I am indeed the lowest hanging fruit. he only wants to meet when no one is available and he has nothing else to do. Guess it doesn't take much effort to send 1-2 gifs a day. Edited January 28, 2020 by Springsummer Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 2 hours ago, Springsummer said: OK, why can't he just said drink? Because across much of the English speaking world, 'go for a coffee' translates to 'sit in a cafe together for a beverage and maybe something small to eat'. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Daisydooks Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 On 1/26/2020 at 6:48 PM, alphamale said: but on the other side of the coin women are always complaining the men aren't "spontaneous" or spur of the moment On a random day at noon when he has shown no sign of wanting to even see her - bad spontaneous. Farts, also bad spontaneous! Hahahaha I love waking up and my fiance being like "hey! I know we were supposed to do yard work today...... but what about we ditch that idea, go for breakfast and we go on a mini road trip?!" This is good spontaneous. Hahaha Link to post Share on other sites
Daisydooks Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 21 minutes ago, Springsummer said: Guess it doesn't take much effort to send 1-2 gifs a day. So he sends no words? Am I understanding this correctly? Link to post Share on other sites
Daisydooks Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 I'm 35 and hate coffee. Hate it. Its gross. He is asking you out, not asking you to drink something you hate. Lol. You can order something different. Lol. Coffee shops ALWAYS have more than coffee, from juice to water, to tea... Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 13 minutes ago, Daisydooks said: I'm 35 and hate coffee. Hate it. Its gross. He is asking you out, not asking you to drink something you hate. Lol. You can order something different. Lol. Coffee shops ALWAYS have more than coffee, from juice to water, to tea... Yep, I'm the one who orders an English Breakfast tea while the others order coffee 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 For the record, a wine bar will have more on offer than wine. Though you might want to check what particular brew houses offer if you don't drink beer. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 10 hours ago, Daisydooks said: On a random day at noon when he has shown no sign of wanting to even see her - bad spontaneous. Farts, also bad spontaneous! Hahahaha I love waking up and my fiance being like "hey! I know we were supposed to do yard work today...... but what about we ditch that idea, go for breakfast and we go on a mini road trip?!" This is good spontaneous. Hahaha you're funny daisydooks Link to post Share on other sites
SumGuy Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 19 hours ago, Springsummer said: n I texted that I saw the bad news of famous NBA player and he responded quickly in agreement This noon he sent an affectionate gif again! 14 hours ago, Springsummer said: I don't know what's the deal now. Maybe I am indeed the lowest hanging fruit. he only wants to meet when no one is available and he has nothing else to do. Guess it doesn't take much effort to send 1-2 gifs a day. He's bread crumbing you and stringing you along. You are a potential future hook up whom is "wowing" with his quirky no effort "charm." If he really wanted to meet, he would choose a day or propose a new one. Not radio silence. He thinks he has you because you followed up with the news even after he ignored your request to meet, he's trying to get you desperate and confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 29, 2020 Author Share Posted January 29, 2020 5 hours ago, SumGuy said: He's bread crumbing you and stringing you along. You are a potential future hook up whom is "wowing" with his quirky no effort "charm." If he really wanted to meet, he would choose a day or propose a new one. Not radio silence. He thinks he has you because you followed up with the news even after he ignored your request to meet, he's trying to get you desperate and confused. Sigh, Case closed. He is not the one for me if he plays game. He made the worst mistake he could possibly make if he thinks I am a potential hookup. I don't believe in premarital sex. I said 'I suggested another day, you don't even answer it." 24 hours, no response. I am going to delete him. and good by. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 29, 2020 Share Posted January 29, 2020 (edited) 22 hours ago, Springsummer said: OK, why can't he just said drink? anyway, WHY he is not responding to my suggestion now but sending me gif again??? He wanted what he wanted -- coffee -- when he wanted it -- in that moment. Now he knows you are going away & he is stymied. I don't think he was looking for a hook up. I think he's just a bit clueless & now you are reading that as a game playing. Leave it be. Go on your trip. Safe travels & have fun. When you get if you are still interested you can resume something . . . texting him . . . more gifs . .. whatever but I doubt this guy is a planner. Your last message was a bit snarky. I doubt you will hear from him again because you effectively slammed this door shut. In part I don't blame you because I can't stand equivocation either but you may have been better served trying to end the impasse through voice rather than text. Edited January 29, 2020 by d0nnivain 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 29, 2020 Author Share Posted January 29, 2020 (edited) 18 minutes ago, d0nnivain said: He wanted what he wanted -- coffee -- when he wanted it -- in that moment. Now he knows you are going away & he is stymied. I don't think he was looking for a hook up. I think he's just a bit clueless & now you are reading that as a game playing. Leave it be. Go on your trip. Safe travels & have fun. When you get if you are still interested you can resume something . . . texting him . . . more gifs . .. whatever but I doubt this guy is a planner. but he didn't response to my suggestion. I am leaving on Sat. so we still have 5 days to meet, when I texted.. my last text was " 'I suggested another day, you don't even bother to answer.:)" which was about 21 hours ago. He ignores me:) he ignores me! Edited January 29, 2020 by Springsummer Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 29, 2020 Share Posted January 29, 2020 I know he didn't respond & that would have annoyed me too but when he sent the gif I would have called if I wanted to have some beverage with him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 29, 2020 Author Share Posted January 29, 2020 Thanks for all the responses. I will just leave this whole thing alone. tired. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 (edited) 23 hours ago, d0nnivain said: Your last message was a bit snarky. I doubt you will hear from him again because you effectively slammed this door shut. In part I don't blame you because I can't stand equivocation either but you may have been better served trying to end the impasse through voice rather than text. What the HELL?! He sent me a gif(a bear patting another crying bear) this noon. WITHOUT replying or saying a word. he usually sent gif less than half day. now this one had been 38 hours. What are the possibly explanations for this behavior? Edited January 30, 2020 by Springsummer Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 How old are you 2? Find a man that is local AND knows how to use words. Link to post Share on other sites
SumGuy Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 14 hours ago, Springsummer said: What the HELL?! He sent me a gif(a bear patting another crying bear) this noon. WITHOUT replying or saying a word. he usually sent gif less than half day. now this one had been 38 hours. What are the possibly explanations for this behavior? Is the gif supposed to symbolically represent what is going on? Who needs such cryptic communication? I can think of many possible explanations for this behavior, but none that would make me want to see such a person. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Springsummer Posted January 30, 2020 Author Share Posted January 30, 2020 9 hours ago, Gaeta said: How old are you 2? Find a man that is local AND knows how to use words. certain age, and none has kid less than 10km, how more local can we get? there isn't a profession in this world that should know more how to use words than his. and is bilingual. he said he can teach me French. Link to post Share on other sites
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