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Beside myself with heart ache

justified

By justified,
in Self-Improvement and Personal Well-Being

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justified

justified

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My brother in his early 60’s went to the hospital for a simple gall bladder outpatient surgery. He came home and was on bed rest. The next day he could not carry on a conversation and was very sick. Now he is in a coma. My brother was fine before he went in. They gave us so many different stories. First they could not figure out what was happening. For two days. Then they said he had contacted ecoli. in his blood. I dont understand how this could happen. Now he is in a coma. Has this ever happen to anyone else? What did you do?

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d0nnivain

d0nnivain

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I am so very sorry.  If the story keeps changing perhaps it's time to consult an attorney to determine if there was malpractice.  

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justified

justified

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He has had four surgeries since that out patient microscopic one. That is what I think. Do you think it is wise to do while he is still in there?

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d0nnivain

d0nnivain

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Yes it would be better to make inquiry now.  I don't mean to be callous but a living injured plaintiff (your brother) is worth more then a dead malpractice victim.  When he's alive it's about his quality of life & any care he may need.  After he dies a jury will view the family (other then a wife & kids) as money grubbing opportunists.  I am not saying you are doing anything other then loving your brother but if the hospital where he is now is at fault, wouldn't it be better to know & get his care transferred elsewhere?  

Sadly sometimes bad stuff just happens.  The husband of one of my mom's friends died after a "routine" gallbladder surgery.  We couldn't figure out what happened so she consulted a lawyer.  The records showed heart failure & that the medical staff did everything to save him.  It wasn't malpractice but the formal inquiry made her feel better knowing that the staff tried to save him.  So she got peace of mind.  

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Ruby Slippers

Ruby Slippers

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I agree with @d0nnivain's advice. Hospitals do make mistakes, sometimes big ones.

I'm sorry about what happened to your brother. I hope he recovers soon.

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justified

justified

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I just returned from ICU and it was the most awful thing I have ever seen. He looked like an inflated balloon. He still had the breathing tube in and I found out it was septic that he caught while having surgery! I was holding his hand and telling him I love him and he opened his eyes and was saying help me and gagging on the tube. He didn't say the words but the look in his eyes said it all. He started to flail his body around and all these things started beeping. I felt so bad for saying anything to him. It must be horrible to have that tube down his throat. I had to leave I cannot stop crying. What am I going to do. I have been reading about being vented for long time and this is causing his swelling. I am so scared for him

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mrs rubble

mrs rubble

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I'm sorry to hear about your brother, I hope he gets well soon. I know how scary it is to have a loved one in ICU, my ex-husband spent two weeks in critical care with pneumonia and pancreatitis after his cancer surgery. He was given a 25% chance of beating it, he's still going strong 20years later.

I will pray for you and your brother.

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justified

justified

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No improvement at all. All I do is cry. The nurse was so mean to him right in front of me. It took every ounce of my being not to go off on her

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Ellener

Ellener

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13 hours ago, justified said:

No improvement at all. All I do is cry. The nurse was so mean to him right in front of me. It took every ounce of my being not to go off on her

I wouldn't lose your temper especially not in front of brother but don't be afraid to be assertive and ask for an explanation, or to say don't speak like that please, he can hear you. The staff are likely feeling very defensive if some level of incompetence caused this not to mention probably trying to avoid litigation, but they are in a professional role and there are standards they are required to uphold in their communication with patients and families.

Spend as much time there as you can calmly, ask what you can do to help and request an explanation of the care procedures etc. The best way you can help your brother especially if he now is becoming more conscious and aware is with reassurance and being a strong loving presence in the room.

My brother was in a coma for @ 10 weeks and slowly came out of it not just woke up 100 % one day. He told me afterwards he couldn't move his head and could only see a board with MRSA +ve written at the top, he didn't understand it and said 'I thought I must be dying with AIDS or something'. If I'd known I would have checked what was in his line of vision ( and hearing- I would have said more basic explanations and comfort words ) and it's the first thing I point out when I work with patients today.

Do plenty of self-care on yourself to give you the strength to help him and not be overwhelmed.

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K.K.

K.K.

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I’m so sorry about your brother, Justified. 

I hope he’s going to be alright. Just concentrate on being there whenever you can because the nurses and cna’s are sometimes overworked and numb and the squeaky wheel really does get the grease in these situations. 

Try to put the medical malpractice thing on the back burner for now. You have enough to worry about. Yes, documenting things wouldn’t hurt but I can tell you it’s almost impossible to win one of these cases unless there was blatant wrongdoing and blunder, such as the doctor amputating a left leg when he was supposed to take the right. 

When you (anyone) signs those papers before surgery, you’re basically giving them the right to kill you. Sad but true. They have their asses covered. Bet! 

My friends daughter was misdiagnosed over and over by one hospital and slowly dying and they didn’t know why. She was flown to a different hospital and had gone into sepsis from what started as pneumonia. They had to cut her leg off to save her life. They couldn’t sue the first hospital because she had basically signed away that option before they would ‘treat’ her. 

It’s a sad mess.

Hang in there. 

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justified

justified

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They took him off the vent finally. But it has entered the brain so he cannot speak.He tries but it is hard to understand him. I hope he comes back 100%. They told us the clip that they put on the intestine fell off and his bowl leaked into his blood. And have cause serious problems. I am not the one who would sue them. That would be up to his older brother. He has been in there for a long time. We will never be able to pay for this hospital stay. We don't know what we are going to do.

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Ellener

Ellener

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2 hours ago, justified said:

We will never be able to pay for this hospital stay. We don't know what we are going to do.

Think about that later (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

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Ellener

Ellener

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2 hours ago, justified said:

I hope he comes back 100%

I was only talking to a man this week who told me he was in a coma for weeks, had to have rehab and learn to walk and talk again. He said he still has a few slight memory issues but on the whole has made an excellent recovery.

One day at a time.

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