Miss Spider Posted February 16, 2020 Posted February 16, 2020 (edited) 43 minutes ago, Prudence V said: Seriously? I thought that was a thing for my mother’s generation, but still? Women have so many more options now, beyond breeding. I know. There are still women who dream of having a big wedding, white picket fence, and raising children. I agree with you though, No idea why. Edited February 16, 2020 by Cookiesandough 1
Els Posted February 16, 2020 Posted February 16, 2020 2 hours ago, Prudence V said: Seriously? I thought that was a thing for my mother’s generation, but still? Women have so many more options now, beyond breeding. Yeah, I never understood people who plan their wedding before they even meet the person they want to marry... but apparently some people really do! Getting married (or having a wedding) doesn't necessarily need to entail breeding, though. 2
d0nnivain Posted February 16, 2020 Posted February 16, 2020 I think planning every detail before you are even dating is over the top but having some general sense of what you want is OK. I always knew that I would dress my bridesmaids in red because it's my favorite color & there would be red flowers for similar reasons. 1
stillafool Posted February 17, 2020 Posted February 17, 2020 (edited) 19 hours ago, Prudence V said: Edited February 17, 2020 by stillafool
Prudence V Posted February 17, 2020 Posted February 17, 2020 17 hours ago, Elswyth said: Getting married (or having a wedding) doesn't necessarily need to entail breeding, though True enough.
Author pepperbird Posted February 17, 2020 Author Posted February 17, 2020 (edited) would like to have had the ceremony outdoors, but my inlaws wanted it inside in their anglican church. the minister was a mean old coot and looked like my old gym teacher. My inlaws showed up late anyway, and got into an argument with her. FUN! Edited February 17, 2020 by pepperbird 1
major_merrick Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 I had a small, intimate wedding with family and close friends. It cost almost nothing. Since I don't like big parties and I've never worn a dress in my life, I'm very glad we did it the way we did. And my ring is simple, cheap, and sturdy. On 2/16/2020 at 12:41 PM, Elswyth said: Getting married (or having a wedding) doesn't necessarily need to entail breeding, though. I my case, it did. I got knocked up on my wedding night, and it was one of the best things to happen to me. I have made the transition from having a career to staying home. I don't miss the daily grind. I do my own projects, I own rental property, and I get to be my feminist rebel self while carrying my babies around. Who says a blonde can't have it all? 1 1
schlumpy Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 Tied the knot at the Weisbaden Rathaus which in Germany handles civil matters. We spent a few days in Strasburg, France. Then we went back to work and saved as much as we could so we had a stake when we got to the States. It was a very good decision for us. 1
alphamale Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 the more you spend on a wedding/reception the shorter the marriage will last, in general
d0nnivain Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 24 minutes ago, alphamale said: the more you spend on a wedding/reception the shorter the marriage will last, in general That is a gross generalization. I will agree that the people who care more about the show of a big over the top wedding then the vows / marriage are doomed. We spent a lot but I brought my wedding in 22% under budget & the cost was more a function of the size. Feeding 400 is expensive, not to mention the open bar. Almost every other aspect of our wedding was done economically. My gown was $399; my veil was $12. We bought our invitations on line for a fraction of what they would cost at a stationary store. Friends who owned a limo company gifted me the fancy cars for the day -- we paid the day rate for two town cars but she gave us the Escalade stretches; thank heavens my big poof-y dress wouldn't have fit in a town car lol. We had the reception on a Sunday which was cheaper per person then Friday or Saturday. We said no to almost all the extras -- colored napkins, chair covers, monogrammed anything, "signature cocktails" etc. I set a budget & a color for the flowers & stuck to it. The only vendor where I didn't shop by price was the photographer. 1
Els Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 10 hours ago, major_merrick said: Who says a blonde can't have it all? Umm, I don't think I have ever heard anyone say that, and I would seriously question their sanity if they did... 1
alphamale Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 17 minutes ago, d0nnivain said: That is a gross generalization. Not really, a study came out a while ago that showed that couples who spent a moderate amount on their wedding had the longest lasting marriages
Els Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 1 minute ago, alphamale said: Not really, a study came out a while ago that showed that couples who spent a moderate amount on their wedding had the longest lasting marriages Just about every couple in Asia is positively doomed, then...
Author pepperbird Posted February 20, 2020 Author Posted February 20, 2020 I was able to do some hand tied bouquets for the tables and wedding party. They were simple- I had a bouquet of calla lilies and the others? Everyone kept asking me what they were- I couldn't figure out why. They're really common-m Queen Anne's Lace- AKA wild carrot. The flowers look lovely and lacy, were free to collect and with their long stems, they are perfect for hand tying. As table favours, we gave out little hand tied bouquets of dried larkspur that one of our profs, gave us as a wedding present. For our honeymoon? We went to northern NB and then. down into Maine and back up to Quebec. not exactly exciting, but my husband had never left his home province before, so it was to him.
hippychick3 Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 My first wedding 20+ years ago was fairly big. My parents paid for it and it was around $15,000. I’m getting remarried next June and it will be a courthouse wedding. There is absolutely no way I’d want a big wedding again. Our money is going towards a honeymoon and home. 1
Gaeta Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 Younger couples usually will want a big amazing wedding. It's like anything else, when young you think big things will bring you happiness, big wedding, big house, big car, etc. Later in life we understand better. If I were to remarry it would be my parents and siblings only or maybe no one at all and a wedding in a beautiful place bf & I visited. The type of wedding you have depends on your age, culture, etc.
Miss Spider Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 (edited) Yes I read the study that said that more money on wedding more likely to split. Also the study that said more expensive engagement ring relative to income is predictor as well. That makes sense though weddings and engagement rings can sink people financially and money issues can cause tensions etc . I don’t know if it matters much otherwise Edited February 20, 2020 by Cookiesandough 1
major_merrick Posted February 20, 2020 Posted February 20, 2020 I think that those who spend more money on their wedding are more likely to split because they don't know how to manage their money. Money and sex are the two biggest reasons that couples fight. So if you are careful and have the ability to squeeze a penny so hard you can press it into a nickel...money will not be a problem. And if you start your relationship with the attitude of "I never say no" then sex is less likely to be a problem. 2
alphamale Posted February 21, 2020 Posted February 21, 2020 3 hours ago, hippychick3 said: My first wedding 20+ years ago was fairly big. My parents paid for it and it was around $15,000. I’m getting remarried next June and it will be a courthouse wedding. There is absolutely no way I’d want a big wedding again. Our money is going towards a honeymoon and home. that sounds great hc3, you've always had a good head on your shoulders 1
mrs rubble Posted February 21, 2020 Posted February 21, 2020 My first wedding cost $28 for the marriage licence and ceremony at the courthouse, we only had witnesses to sign. The marriage lasted 7 years. My second wedding cost $5K, we had it at the surf club and had 100 guests, a live band and a lovely meal. It was a very memorable day. 1
Quinn123 Posted February 24, 2020 Posted February 24, 2020 To be honest, I never understood people who arrange a wedding for hundreds of people, but this is their choice. My wedding was modest and I really liked it. There were only a few people, we had a great time, there were no quarrels and fights, drunken cousins and all that.
SJS Posted February 24, 2020 Posted February 24, 2020 We had a very small wedding. Went on vacation in the Caribbean and got married at the resort which supplied the minister and witnesses. Everyone knew so it technically wasn't eloping. I'm the youngest cousin on both sides of my family, and after watching my cousins get married with all my alcoholic family members getting fall down sloppy drunk at receptions, we decided for our party to rent a pavilion at a forest preserve--no alcohol allowed, a place for the kids to play, and got everyone in and out in a few hours. Worked out perfectly for us. 1
alphamale Posted February 24, 2020 Posted February 24, 2020 I had about 500 people at my wedding reception. The marriage lasted less than 4 years. My next wedding reception (highly unlikely) will be 10 people at Denny's for the early bird special!
Artdeco Posted February 24, 2020 Posted February 24, 2020 Just now, alphamale said: I had about 500 people at my wedding reception. The marriage lasted less than 4 years. My next wedding reception (highly unlikely) will be 10 people at Denny's for the early bird special! Good choice! I think big weddings are over-over-overrated!! 1
lawgirl79 Posted February 28, 2020 Posted February 28, 2020 My first marriage was a large wedding but my second was not. It is a complete waste on money in my eyes but hind sight is 20/20. I did not know that until after I had the large wedding. Honestly, the large wedding is more for the guests than for the bride and groom. It is a complete waste of money and I think just to establish some sort of status with everyone else.
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