Bad Bad Bad...

[Justalilbitnawty]

Now before I even type the whole situation out here I want you all to know I am aware that what happened is wrong and I regret it but I can't help myself now. So here is my story. This year I have a new boss at my job (I am a second year teacher). The first time I saw him I thought he was attractive. Right away he introduced himself to me and every day from there on in he always came up to me saying hi and telling me how beautiful I look and all. One day I was walking with a kid and he is really cute and he says to him "aww aren't you a little cutie" so I'm all "yeah he is isn't he" and he said "I was talking to you". So basically all these flirty things were going on for the whole month of September. He used to walk into my classroom for no reason other than to talk to me about nothing. We had many flirty encounters and people even started asking me if I liked him and if anything was going on between us. Then one day I needed a ride home so he offered to take me. I found out he is married and has 2 children. Actually in his car there was a car seat and childrens toys and all that kinda stuff. However, he told me he has cheated on his wife in the past and that he thinks I am beautiful and was attracted to me the moment he saw me. Basically he told me all of this stuff about how "hot" I am and all that. So (And I really feel bad about this now) we made out in his car. There was a lot of kissing and touching, nothing more than that. Then he was all it was like a dream come true and all this stuff. Then he goes on to tell me how miserable his marriage is and how him and his wife both see other people. So basically he said his wife and him both have others on the side. After that I don't really know what happened because this was on Friday (and lemme tell ya I spent the whole weekend worried about it) and ever since then he was kinda ignoring me. On Monday he briefly stopped by my classroom and in the staff lounge to say hi to me, on Tuesday he came in in the morning to talk about some issue with work and today (Wednesday) we just basically said hi. I don't get it. And I have come to realize I have strong feelings for this guy.I know it's stupid but I really find him to be someone that I would want. He is extremely smart, he is very good looking, he is nice and we have a lot in common. I want to not feel this way and just let things be passed off as a mistake that will never happen again, but I can't seem to let him go. I find myself dressing all cute for him and preparing myself to smell good for him in case we make out again and I find myself going out of the way to run into him during the day... all of the things he used to do before we had our fun but has suddenly stopped doing. I want to move on and forget about him because I come home from work literally in tears for the past 3 days. I want things to be the way they were before what happened happened. I know this is soo wrong, especially since not only is he my boss but he is married too. I just want to know what went wrong over the weekend and why things have changed soo drastically. He is totally not someone I would even want to be with normally, I mean he cheats on his wife. But I can't let go. I want to be with him again or at least have him flirt with me. God please I need help here. I am all messed up over this whole thing. I am usually so levelheaded and never fall for men like this so I don't know what is going on. Please help me. Thanks

[LucreziaBorgia]

I just want to know what went wrong over the weekend and why things have changed soo drastically.

 

What would change for you if you knew the answer to this? It wouldn't really change anything. My guess is that he saw that it was going to present more complications for himself than was worth it to keep going - he may have picked up on the fact that you are in it more than just some random hooking up.

 

I know its eating you up, because it seemed so special at the time (crushes tend to make things seem more significant than they really are) - but the fact is that regardless of what happened over the weekend he is now giving you the cold shoulder after what to him was probably just some random making out with a woman he thought was hot. Best not to dwell on what is behind you, and try to put some focus on what lies ahead.

 

You'll need to pull way back here - and pull back at the same rate that he is pulling away from you. Its risky to begin with, but the fact that he is your boss makes it that much worse. Gossip runs hot, and this guy probably stands to lose a lot. He's only going to get into it for as much as he can afford to lose. If he senses that things might start going in a direction where he stands to lose then he'll back off. Looks like that's exactly what he did.