Why does he take so long to text back, he never texts after 7PM?

[ExpatInItaly]

7 hours ago, Hannahhawks87 said:

I was just wondering if he was interested in me and would maybe see me as more one day 

I don't think he is, at this point. 

You said he mentioned going to a pub, but hasn't followed up. Assuming you responded with enthusiasm (did you?), an interested guy isn't going to take long to nail down plans. 

[Hannahhawks87]

He has just said to me in a text, that he likes being single. He said its drama and hassle free 

[basil67]

Ah, so he knows you're interested and is letting you know that it's not reciprocal.   Time to move on.  

[ExpatInItaly]

2 hours ago, Hannahhawks87 said:

He has just said to me in a text, that he likes being single. He said its drama and hassle free 

That's your hint, OP. 

He's not looking to date you. 

[2BGoodAgain]

1) he's married / has a gf.

2) he's just not that into you.

3) that's just how he is.

4) he's an alien, like from another planet....

[Hannahhawks87]

I have seen him today, and he shouted me over to say hi. We were talking for an hour about random stuff and we got onto the relationship talk. He said to me that every girlfriend he has had in the passed has cheated on him and he has a wall up. He says he loves talking to people face to face rather than on technology. He also said he is happy single but if was friends with someone and they hit it off he could see himself making a future with that person. We laughed and joked again and he texted me good morning again today. 

[preraph]

I'm just going to say that if you had any interest in a guy romantically, would you tell him that you like being single?

[Hannahhawks87]

No I guess not. You think hes just trying to blow me off? 

[ExpatInItaly]

Eh, I think he might be up for some casual fun but I wouldn't get my hopes up for more than that. 

He still hasn't asked you out, right?

[Hannahhawks87]

No, he did mention about drinks at the pub. But it was like a passing comment. 

[smackie9]

He's giving you breadcrumbs.

[Hannahhawks87]

What does that mean? 

[elaine567]

 

Quote

If you find yourself doing any of the following then you’re in a breadcrumb relationship:

1. Waiting around for calls or texts
2. Waiting around for plans to be made and or to be confirmed
3. Feeling like you’re last on the priority list
4. Overthinking, analysing or feeling generally insecure about your partner’s affections
5. Hearing a lot of “I’m very busy… I hoped you’d understand…”
6. Fearing that if you express your needs you’ll be labelled as ‘needy’ or ‘too much

 

1.  

Edited February 24, 2020 by elaine567

[S2B]

1 hour ago, smackie9 said:

He's giving you breadcrumbs.

Less than crumbs.

youre wasting your time with this guy.

[Hannahhawks87]

I think I'm just gonna knock it on the head. At first I thought he was generally interested but the more I'm reading these comments and talking to my friends the more I'm realising that I shouldn't be feeling this way about anyone. Thank you for all your comments.

[kendahke]

On 2/24/2020 at 4:15 AM, Hannahhawks87 said:

He has just said to me in a text, that he likes being single. He said its drama and hassle free 

Translation: I'm not checking for you

[kendahke]

On 2/24/2020 at 9:42 AM, Hannahhawks87 said:

No I guess not. You think hes just trying to blow me off? 

I think he's being pleasant to customers in the shop to keep the boss happy with revenue being spent in the boss' establishment.

[manfrombelow2]

On 2/23/2020 at 4:43 AM, Hannahhawks87 said:

I've know him for a couple of years really. But we recently exchanged numbers. We text but he takes between 5- 6 hours to reply. He does reply with long paragraphs. This week is his week off because he is doing some work on the house, so I knew he wouldn't be texting that much. But he's been online and ignored my texts and only messaged later on. But then it takes him another 3 hours to reply. He hardly ever texts after 7PM, but reply to me the next morning answering the question and ask him how I am. I'm honestly not too bothered about the not texting much. I get that people have lives. But I'm abit confused. When he texts, he texts me paragraphs but then takes a day to text back. Shall I presume he's not interested or has a girlfriend?

No.

You are having needy and clingy behaviours, which is not a good thing.

Instead of brainstorming on why this guy took so long to reply to your texts, you should build for yourself more social and healthy relationships & activities.

And judging from your data, I take it that you guys are not even in an official relationship yet, so you should not question the way he replies to your texts.

[smackie9]

Breadcrumbs....feeding you little bits of interest and you keep picking at it like a pigeon.

[Luna66star]

You are just a casual acquaintance to him.  These types are unpredictable and tend to pop in and out of your life.  It wont change. 

If you start attaching yourself too soon to someone you don't know that well yet, the results and your expectations could be shattered.  It's best to remain detached (if possible) and not focus too heavily on this person.  If your mindset is to "wait around" and see if he's really interested, you are relinquishing all your personal power- and letting him decide your worth and whether your worth him giving you attention on a regular more consistent basis. 

It appears you don't like a guy giving you such intermittent attention and mixed signals.  That's your standard.  Make a pact with yourself to say I will not wait around for men like this.  Then move on without anger, resentment or negative feelings.   Because you know what you want from men.  And this isn't it!