basil67 Posted February 25, 2020 Share Posted February 25, 2020 If he didn't put a return address on the parcel, it means he doesn't want you to know where he lives or to contact him. I would suggest you respect this. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 25, 2020 Share Posted February 25, 2020 On 2/24/2020 at 4:37 PM, KirstyNicole said: I know that, I know he lost a really good job. He lost his family. His flat. All because of me. If you know his family go to them and tell them the truth so he can have the support of them. This is the least you can do to make his life better. Link to post Share on other sites
Blues Drive Monster Posted February 25, 2020 Share Posted February 25, 2020 On 2/24/2020 at 7:26 AM, KirstyNicole said: I brought my ex in to our world, and my ex took issue with him But you couldn't have known things would have gone like that. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 25, 2020 Share Posted February 25, 2020 It's possible he has no where to live and didn't want to put a temporary address. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted February 26, 2020 Share Posted February 26, 2020 11 hours ago, KirstyNicole said: I just want to talk to him,. I sound selfish but if I talk to him, I can at least be at peace knowing we've talked. I get that. I hope you get the opportunity to talk and clear the air x Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted February 26, 2020 Share Posted February 26, 2020 Please let us know if you are successful. I would love to hear a happy ending to your quest to regain your honor. Link to post Share on other sites
vla1120 Posted February 26, 2020 Share Posted February 26, 2020 I think someone else already suggested it, but I would also seek out his family and let them know the truth. I would also look into whether there are any organizations in the UK that help exonerate people who were wrongly convicted (or were set up by someone, as your friend was.) Since it is the conviction that has ruined his life (and not you, per se), knowing the truth, I would do everything I could to help clear his record. That would be a way of making up for what happened. Perhaps you could consult a defense attorney who might be able to help you with this. As other people have stated, your only sin was that you were controlled and abused by a horrible man who did this to a friend of yours to get him out of the way. Now that you see the light, all you can do is try to fix what was broken. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted February 27, 2020 Author Share Posted February 27, 2020 11 hours ago, vla1120 said: I think someone else already suggested it, but I would also seek out his family and let them know the truth. I would also look into whether there are any organizations in the UK that help exonerate people who were wrongly convicted (or were set up by someone, as your friend was.) Since it is the conviction that has ruined his life (and not you, per se), knowing the truth, I would do everything I could to help clear his record. That would be a way of making up for what happened. Perhaps you could consult a defense attorney who might be able to help you with this. As other people have stated, your only sin was that you were controlled and abused by a horrible man who did this to a friend of yours to get him out of the way. Now that you see the light, all you can do is try to fix what was broken. Thank you all for replying Here the police would need to "accept" the evidence before an appeal can be lodged in these circumstances. I just badly want to explain to him. Make sure he is ok. Some have said I lost the right to care about him. We've got some cold weather at the minute. I'm hoping he at least has somewhere to stay, he has money for food, gas and electric. I hope he is ok. I've not been sleeping that well, not that it matters I've been so worried. Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted February 27, 2020 Share Posted February 27, 2020 Kirsty: Here's an article I ran across in the US edition of the Guardian. It may supply some ideas for you. You could try to contact the author of the article and see if he can help you. I cannot find anything in the UK that resembles the Innocence Project or is aimed at exoneration of convicted criminals. I fear you will be walking uphill to get this done. Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted February 28, 2020 Author Share Posted February 28, 2020 Thank you for replying, there is no link on the post? I fear its uphill too. Speaking to his family is pointless they've disowned him I've put messages out to the friends I think would still be in touch. Not heard back from them yet Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted February 28, 2020 Share Posted February 28, 2020 I apologize for that. https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/prison-innocent-police-misconduct-prosecutors-inmates-released-exonerations-2017-a8256521.html https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-41108765 https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2002/jul/28/ukcrime.prisonsandprobation 1 Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted February 29, 2020 Share Posted February 29, 2020 I am not sure how you can find your friend but I must say that is a horrible story. I cannot believe ANYONE would go to that extreme to hurt someone like that. Your ex is an evil person who deserves what he's gotten. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted February 29, 2020 Share Posted February 29, 2020 You only have a suspicion that your ex did it, no proof, right? Because if you had proof of it, I'd expect you to go to the police immediately and sue him for what he did. And then he'd owe money to this friend as compensation. If your suspicion is more than a gut feeling, go to the police and tell them. They might decide to investigate the ex. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted March 1, 2020 Author Share Posted March 1, 2020 On 2/29/2020 at 4:07 PM, simpycurious said: I am not sure how you can find your friend but I must say that is a horrible story. I cannot believe ANYONE would go to that extreme to hurt someone like that. Your ex is an evil person who deserves what he's gotten. I agree, he wanted to control me, My friend was always helping me to get out and meet new people and be myself. My ex hated that, he would rather me stay at home. My ex used to take my debit and credit cards. Give me cash and make me live off that. He was nasty and I thought I was in love. 19 hours ago, justwhoiam said: You only have a suspicion that your ex did it, no proof, right? Because if you had proof of it, I'd expect you to go to the police immediately and sue him for what he did. And then he'd owe money to this friend as compensation. If your suspicion is more than a gut feeling, go to the police and tell them. They might decide to investigate the ex. My ex told me he did it. I don't have proof that the police would want. Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 23 minutes ago, KirstyNicole said: I agree, he wanted to control me, My friend was always helping me to get out and meet new people and be myself. My ex hated that, he would rather me stay at home. My ex used to take my debit and credit cards. Give me cash and make me live off that. He was nasty and I thought I was in love. My ex told me he did it. I don't have proof that the police would want. The first part of that ^ sounds like slavery in a way. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted March 1, 2020 Share Posted March 1, 2020 38 minutes ago, KirstyNicole said: My ex told me he did it. I don't have proof that the police would want. It'd be enough to record him say that. It'd be enough proof to grill him. Trying to find your friend when you are not even trying to restore his reputation and life makes little sense to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted March 1, 2020 Author Share Posted March 1, 2020 31 minutes ago, simpycurious said: The first part of that ^ sounds like slavery in a way. It was, I had a budget of so much money a week to buy the shopping, I had to account for every penny spent with receipts. One time he argued with me for a week over £2. My friend asked me once to look after a credit card of his. I'd like to think he knew and was helping me subtly 14 minutes ago, justwhoiam said: It'd be enough to record him say that. It'd be enough proof to grill him. Trying to find your friend when you are not even trying to restore his reputation and life makes little sense to me. I didn't record him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted March 1, 2020 Author Share Posted March 1, 2020 (edited) One of our friends who I did message to see if he could pass a message on (and gave him a message) He just replied "Consider it done." I replied asking if he knew where he was, He just replied "I can't say, I'm sure he is ok though" I'm hoping this is a good thing. Edited March 1, 2020 by KirstyNicole 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted March 3, 2020 Author Share Posted March 3, 2020 Not heard anything yet 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted March 7, 2020 Author Share Posted March 7, 2020 Heard back last night. He said Quote Hi Kirsty Its really nice hearing from you via Richie. I hope you are keeping well. I'm plodding along here got a bad chest infection at the minute, I'm trying to get the landlord to sort the damp out. but its a roof over my head because not many people want to give the decent jobs to us apparent drug dealers and this is all I can afford. I'm glad you got the voucher and the coffee machine, sorry its not much it is all I can afford at the minute. I hope the voucher is okay too. The woman in the shop said if you didn't want to buy house things you can buy yourself some clothes or something. If you want, send me some pictures of the new house when you are in, I'd like to see it. I saw them being built when I was up at Richies a few Sunday's back. It was the first time I have seen him since being released, we had Sunday lunch at his house. I hope you and <my ex> are doing well. When I was back on the way to Richie's I tried to visit my mum and dad they asked who I was as all they saw was a drug dealer. I tried to visit some old places but the word had got around that I was some El Chappo. Which I know isn't true. Everyone thinks it is so I've been found guilty twice of something I've not done. I did get your letters, I didn't reply because of the last visit. Where you doubted my innocence and how you were upset I brought drugs in to our world. When you gave up on me, I decided it was me against the world. I had no one, how do you think 4 years of being on your own was for me? I'm sorry for being selfish but I've been convicted of something I never done. I lost my home, I lost my job, I lost my world but more importantly I lost my dignity and good name. I can't travel to the places I want to because rightly so they don't want convicted drug dealers. I know you've asked to meet. If you are serious, then this would need to wait until I can afford the train to a city between us. I'm living month to month at the minute I spent the last of my wage on sending those things to you. If you are wondering how bad things are for me, I dropped your package off because I couldn't afford the collection fee. and I couldn't even afford the bus to the UPS depot and had to walk the 3 miles each way. When I went to Richie's it was the first time in a while I had some decent food inside me. Not that any of this is your problem. If you wish to keep in touch, I'm available on this e-mail. I will reply if I have internet/wifi available. If this is the last time we speak. I hope things in life go great for you. Maybe one day we can have some form of relationship if you wish. All the best. I don't know what to think or even reply with. I spoke to our friend mentioned. He said that he has seen him and he didn't just have seconds he had thirds/fourths but he expected that and he gave him a load of tins and food. I want to help him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted March 7, 2020 Author Share Posted March 7, 2020 He then followed it up with Quote Just me again. I still have a picture of us when we first really became friends and as you said I was looking after you. Its one of the few good memories I have because of the things I told you about. If you don't feel comfortable with me having it still or you rather I didn't. let me know I'll post it to you so you know its been destroyed. I hope you know I'm not a bad person and I didn't do any of this. I'm just me. I was that guy who looked out for you and tried to protect you. Look. I'm not angry that you sided with <my ex> and the others, I'm more hurt after everything we went through together you'd think I'd do something like this. Even if you don't want to talk to me, let me know about the picture. I know how you feel about these things and I'm not one to keep things if it makes someone uncomfortable. I am shocked he still has this picture. I remember it Link to post Share on other sites
nospam99 Posted March 7, 2020 Share Posted March 7, 2020 OP, from what you've written, I understand you live in the UK. Do you have public defenders there? Was there a trial for your friend (you say he was convicted)? If so, who represented him at his trial? Link to post Share on other sites
Author KirstyNicole Posted March 7, 2020 Author Share Posted March 7, 2020 5 minutes ago, nospam99 said: OP, from what you've written, I understand you live in the UK. Do you have public defenders there? Was there a trial for your friend (you say he was convicted)? If so, who represented him at his trial? He had a solicitor that was funded by legal aid. He funded his appeal and because he had the stuff it was 100% conviction Link to post Share on other sites
nospam99 Posted March 7, 2020 Share Posted March 7, 2020 OP, you did not answer my question about public defenders. Regardless, do you remember who the 'solicitor' was (I'm sorry if UK jargon might confuse me)? Could you contact the solicitor and discuss what your ex told you AND the circumstance that your ex is NOW (if I understand the scenario) himself a convicted drug dealer? Other than the 'stuff' in your friends car, what was the other evidence? Link to post Share on other sites
nospam99 Posted March 7, 2020 Share Posted March 7, 2020 Have you contacted your friend's parents to discuss what your ex told you? Link to post Share on other sites
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