L956 Posted March 4, 2020 Share Posted March 4, 2020 Me and my partner have been together close to 5 years we’re young lovers I’m 25 and theirs a 4 year age gap between us. My partner suffers with bipolar and has other mental illnesses that I’ve supported her with throughout the relationship. 2 years into our relationship I found out she had cheated on me and slept with somebody else we had a 3 month break but we got through it she proved herself to me, she was young and naive at the time we got back together and went on to have 2 children together and a home of our own. The last 6 weeks she’s became distant, she got 2 bunches of flowers on Valentine’s Day one off myself and another off her dad apparently until I found the card off somebody else whilst she was out on a date with this person, she had been in contact with him for 2 weeks but insisted that she hadn’t cheated this time, I chose to believe her although I did find her actions unfaithful she went out with this person again once more I knew she had but she wouldn’t own up to it I lost my head and we had a massive fall out I cut complete contact with her for no longer than 6 days, she got in contact with me and told me she loved me and she missed me and just wanted me she was this person that I fell in love with again, she says she’s been honest with me and nothing ever happened with this guy although they did go out with each other twice she says it was just an escape from the strain the relationship has been under and nothing even happened, I’ve seen her on two occasions since we’ve been back in touch and she throws herself at me showing me all the love in the world the love I’ve craved for this time she’s been distant, I just don’t know what to do with my life right now if I wanted to give it another go then the choice is mine but how I can trust her all my life I’ve wanted a family I had it with her I can have it back but what if I get hurt again I just don’t know what to do maybe more time will help but at the moment I’m struggling I just feel like the trust barrier is gone Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted March 4, 2020 Share Posted March 4, 2020 She’s going on dates with another guy and it’s not cheating? All cheaters lie a lot. This is the second time. You’ll get this again. Dating is a tryout, she's failed twice. Stop being so naive. Dump her (she’s already dumped you). You are setting yourself up for failure staying in this. Zero future here. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted March 5, 2020 Share Posted March 5, 2020 I don't know at this juncture what guarantee she can provide that this won't happen again, again, and again. The ball is in your court as to how much you can tolerate. You don't appear disturbed by the thought and images of her cheating on you. Trust can be rebuilt but in her case it's going to take a lot of heavy lifting on her part before you are not wanting her to wear a tracking device. If you want to keep her I think you may have to consider an open marriage. You are already in one in case you didn't know. The best thing for you is walk away with the hope of finding love with someone more exclusive. I can't see you going through life with someone you can't trust. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted March 7, 2020 Share Posted March 7, 2020 It would be incredibly foolish to give this woman another chance. You will get hurt again if you do. Guaranteed. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted March 10, 2020 Share Posted March 10, 2020 Seriously? She was seeing someone else and you were OK with that? No, just no. No-one goes on dates with someone while they are in a long term relationship. She is unfaithful and always will be. You'd be crazy to let her back in. Link to post Share on other sites
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