Eire111 Posted March 4, 2020 Share Posted March 4, 2020 (edited) Hi All Thanks for reading, long story short my ex broke up with me 2 months ago didn't cheat but did hurt her unintentionally, I done every break up mistake the usual begging etc etc, anyway 2 weeks ago we had a fight over text and she said it was 100 percent over so I just asked her to post my stuff back to me and went no contact, as I said that was 2 weeks ago and it didn't arrive and I hadn't heard from her, so i went to her house last Thursday to recover items. When she answered the door I said I would like to talk but if you don't want to I will just get last of my things and go, her reply was I am not ready to talk to you yet I need more time and will reach out when I am ready, she told me my things were in her car ready to post if I want them, however she never went in doors to get her car keys and the car was locked, I replied stupidly now keep my things and I will collect them when you reach out to me to talk. Is she afraid to just tell me it's over with all my begging at the start of the break up or is she confused or is she hurt and punishing me. I am leaving it alone for a month and want to go no contact infidelity unless she reaches out but I do have to go back and get my things as she has said four times she will post them now and still hasn't. Do I take her at face value and believe she needs some time to think as I am only giving her space now, sorry for all the questions I am confused I honestly thought last Thursday would have gave me some answers one way or the other but now more confused than ever cheers Edited March 4, 2020 by Eire111 Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted March 4, 2020 Share Posted March 4, 2020 What did you do to hurt her? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eire111 Posted March 4, 2020 Author Share Posted March 4, 2020 Something I shouldn't and wish I could take back, but it is done now and I regret what I done. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted March 4, 2020 Share Posted March 4, 2020 Just now, Eire111 said: Something I shouldn't and wish I could take back, but it is done now and I regret what I done. Obviously you aren't to divulge what you did which tells me its really bad. 3 hours ago, Eire111 said: she said it was 100 percent over She's never going to talk, especially if you betrayed her trust in some way. Just get someone to go over and pick up your stuff for you and leave it at that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted March 4, 2020 Share Posted March 4, 2020 Have your stuff mailed to you. Don't contact her ever again. She will need to break NC not you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eire111 Posted March 4, 2020 Author Share Posted March 4, 2020 (edited) I hear you but she has told me 4 times in the last two months she would post them to me and still hasn't, I need them as they are passports, legal documents. Two weeks ago we had a text fight which she said we are never getting back together and I asked her to send my documents for the last time, they didn't arrive so I had to drive to her house to collect them and that is what she said and didn't give them to me. I know looking back now I should have got them but no point in stating the obvious, that was last week and haven't arrived again this week so I have no other option but to sit tight for a few weeks and go again, I now know her saying I need more time and will reach out I replied well keep my stuff and I will collect when you want to talk was me hoping for something but see now I should have taken them Edited March 4, 2020 by Eire111 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eire111 Posted March 4, 2020 Author Share Posted March 4, 2020 3 hours ago, JTSW said: Obviously you aren't to divulge what you did which tells me its really bad. She's never going to talk, especially if you betrayed her trust in some way. Just get someone to go over and pick up your stuff for you and leave it at that. I hear you and that is why I went to pick up my things as I have asked her 4 times to post them to me, and they are my passport legal documents etc. So when she answered I asked for my things she replied I don't want to talk to you yet I need my time and will reach out, she said my things are in her car ready to post and didn't make an effort to go get car keys so I stupidly replied hold onto them and I will collect them when you are ready to talk (I see know where I should have got them), however I was living in false hope with what she said and not going to get car keys to open the car door for me to get them, I just a bit confused as to why she would say that, unfortunately she lives a good bit away from me so I will have to go back up, just letting her sit on it for a few weeks to see if she does reach out if not I will just text her and ask her to leave them at the door, just can't get my head around why she would say that and not give me the things to get me out of her life she she is done that's all Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eire111 Posted March 4, 2020 Author Share Posted March 4, 2020 (edited) Just now, Eire111 said: I hear you and that is why I went to pick up my things as I have asked her 4 times to post them to me, and they are my passport legal documents etc. So when she answered I asked for my things she replied I don't want to talk to you yet I need my time and will reach out, she said my things are in her car ready to post and didn't make an effort to go get car keys so I stupidly replied hold onto them and I will collect them when you are ready to talk (I see know where I should have got them), however I was living in false hope with what she said and not going to get car keys to open the car door for me to get them, I just a bit confused as to why she would say that, unfortunately she lives a good bit away from me so I will have to go back up, just letting her sit on it for a few weeks to see if she does reach out if not I will just text her and ask her to leave them at the door, just can't get my head around why she would say that and not give me the things to get me out of her life she she is done that's all Also It is not really bad, just private thanks, I didn't cheat or abuse her all that matters Edited March 4, 2020 by Eire111 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 4, 2020 Share Posted March 4, 2020 You know you erred when you didn't leave with your stuff. You thought that was leverage to get her to talk. It wasn't. It was a way of you staying connected to her because you are still hoping for reconciliation. All you have done is inconvenienced yourself. Do you have any mutual friends? Does she know any of your family? Tell her a date & time when that person will be by to pick up your stuff. Then have them go get it. She's never going to have a discussion with you where she talks to you in a way that will give you closure. She doesn't have the words. Few people do in that situation. Closure comes from within. Link to post Share on other sites
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