CLS63AMG Posted March 11, 2020 Share Posted March 11, 2020 3 hours ago, Gaeta said: But you have not answered if you tried it or not, if your opinion is based on an opinion only or on actual experience. I have noticed a few people on here,who have never used online dating are in the front row bashing online dating. Personally I was online 3,5 years, made at least 200 first meeting. I have seen it all. My opinion is OLD is not for everyone. If someone wants to try it he/she needs to have a tough skin and use judgement. Using judgement means having a very clear profile and only speaking to other people with a profile aiming toward the same goal. OP is using OLD too 'at large'. She needs to A) be very specific about what she is looking for B) Ask a lot of questions C) Only meet men who have answered her questions with good answers. If she did that she would meet less men, but better suited to her. If you met 200 men I'd say you had very low, if any standards at all. Sorry. 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted March 11, 2020 Share Posted March 11, 2020 (edited) 7 minutes ago, CLS63AMG said: If you met 200 men I'd say you had very low, if any standards at all. Sorry. What is your expertise to make such a judgement? Would you please elaborate on your statement and detail your conclusion to me? You have gathered 0 information from me so how can you judge my standard? I live in a city of 4 millions, I had plenty of choice of interesting men. 3,5 years = 42 months 200 men / by 42 months = 4.7 men per month That's 1 meeting per week. Edited March 11, 2020 by Gaeta 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CLS63AMG Posted March 11, 2020 Share Posted March 11, 2020 You met 200 men, I don't need to explain anything. 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SumGuy Posted March 11, 2020 Share Posted March 11, 2020 (edited) 16 minutes ago, CLS63AMG said: If you met 200 men I'd say you had very low, if any standards at all. Sorry. Hmmm kind of seems like the opposite to me. She kept looking because wasn’t finding someone who met her standards. it certainly bespeaks some experience I hope you aren’t assuming she had sex with them all Edited March 11, 2020 by SumGuy 5 Link to post Share on other sites
balletomane Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 17 hours ago, SumGuy said: I don't have 6 pack abs or a Porsche and don't put anything like that on my profile. Actually to an extent the opposite. Still have zero problem getting likes and messages, and a good 50%+ response rate to my likes/messages. I'm a woman and when I was using OLD I actively screened out anyone who was posing shirtless or with a fancy car. I know a lot of women who find that unattractive. To add to the positive stories on here, I only met one person via OLD and one was enough. We're now in a relationship. You're right, the people who've had good experiences are less likely to share them. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 I only ever used free sites, just couldn't bring myself to pay for dates. Sure, there's more rabble, but my filters were stringent and I went into it with the mentality that I'd have to weed out a lot of people to find someone special. I did get a lot of "what's a woman like you doing on a site like this?" comments. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Backinthesaddleagain Posted March 12, 2020 Author Share Posted March 12, 2020 30 minutes ago, Ruby Slippers said: I only ever used free sites, just couldn't bring myself to pay for dates. Sure, there's more rabble, but my filters were stringent and I went into it with the mentality that I'd have to weed out a lot of people to find someone special. I did get a lot of "what's a woman like you doing on a site like this?" comments. Soooo.... "what's a women like you doing on a site like this?" 😛 Link to post Share on other sites
adria37 Posted March 27, 2020 Share Posted March 27, 2020 POF keeps inactive people on longer than a month. I was matched with a guy that died in December. How is that for messing with your head. Ugh can't decide if it is even worth it anymore. I just want a nice, sane man that isn't in the grave or half way there. I know I am getting on up there in age but come on! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dangerous Posted March 29, 2020 Share Posted March 29, 2020 On 3/11/2020 at 7:12 PM, Gaeta said: Mistake 1: Using an 'app'. A woman looking to date in a very last century kind of way needs a serious dating website Mistake 2: Using a 'free' again A woman looking to date in a very last century kind of way needs to skim her prospects and the only way to do a good job at skimming is through membership. Hopeful30: If you want good quality shoes you won't go shopping at Walmart right? So same here. If you are looking for a certain type of man, traditional, conservative, last century gentleman, you won't find him on a free app. For good shoes you need to aim at specialty stores, for the type of man you are looking for you need a specialty dating website. Having used several dating sites in the UK both paid and unpaid, they are all poor. Not only scammers but also lots of 'damaged' people who are desperate, unreasonable, mentally unbalanced: it's like the twilight zone! My conclusion is that it is a numbers game: like most things in life: real life dating, business, job applications, etc. In today's overcrowded world where the vast majority want a quick fix, you have to accept you need to invest a LOT of time before you might get a meaningful experience. OLD is just ANOTHER tool. You cannot rely on it solely, best to use it in conjunction with real life socialising. And above all be careful as OLD is full of scammers, mixed-up people who really don't know what they really want, and it can seriously damage your mental health/ self esteem! PS: And now in this time of Corona, OLD is even less valuable. You can't meet people for ages, so all you will get is virtual chat, and your chances of keeping a genuine person engaged for a long time, without meeting is unrealistic. The only significant benefit of OLD right now is for instant gratification against loneliness whilst being on social lockdown. Finding a genuine relationship has to wait. Link to post Share on other sites
Trail Blazer Posted March 31, 2020 Share Posted March 31, 2020 On 3/11/2020 at 10:45 AM, MsJayne said: I'm guessing you're probably using POF or Oasis, both of them are full of scammers, hookers, and other assorted date site creeps. I've never heard of Oasis but POF is one I used a lot for six odd months of 2019. There was the odd scammer/fake profile, but I didn't find it too bad. The scammers were so obvious to me that I just ignored them. I'd often find their account would be removed within a few hours of them messaging me. Link to post Share on other sites
Trail Blazer Posted March 31, 2020 Share Posted March 31, 2020 On 3/11/2020 at 9:12 AM, Ruby Slippers said: lol I encountered a number of whiny men who complained about what a bad day they had within a few messages. Delete. Nobody needs a Debby Downer for a boyfriend/girlfriend. Exactly. So many men especially, don't understand how much of a turn off it is for women to hear a man sook like a whiny b!tch. I feel for men who have mental health issues, because whilst women are generally more empathetic than men, they are sexually attracted to a man that has his s*** together. Link to post Share on other sites
Trail Blazer Posted March 31, 2020 Share Posted March 31, 2020 On 3/11/2020 at 3:32 PM, thaygiaogiang said: It's quite unfair of you to "hate the human race" just because of the toxicity caused by the online dating apps. To me, online dating apps are pure cancer. For starters they are where people come to show off sexually and materialistically. Say if you don't have six pack abs and a Porsche in your album, your chances of scoring women are low. At the same time, you can't show off your PhD, how hard you work, how honest you are and other rather abstract qualities which ironically are essential for building relationships. To sum it up, they are crazy and unregulated markets where goods are sex and money. You can't gain anything positive from OLD, let alone a healthy, stable and meaningful relationship. Your personal experience is just that; an anecdote. I never posted any shirtless pictures nor did I ever make any reference to my disposable income. Yet, I had more dates than I knew what to do with. I had fun for six months, hooking up with women from Tinder, Bumble and POF. I met my girlfriend on Bumble and we clicked straight away. She's a great catch - intelligent, honest, funny and beautiful. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted March 31, 2020 Share Posted March 31, 2020 (edited) They were mostly a sewer back when and just as much for a guy as anyone else believe me if you were male op you'd see the crap they also deal with. Butttt, on mine there were also some great women among it all too, just people trying it thinking you never know maybe l meet the right person just like l was . Took like about 30 seconds training day one in spotting all the bs and a wk or so discovering and figuring out settings to best suit you but after that personally, apart from tits and g string'd women popping up all over the place in ads non stop - mine said if you use the paid version you don't get ads , doubt that though and l just stayed on the free one anyway , but it was ok , met some damn nice women once l got the hang of it. But yeah it was 2/3rds sewer on the rest - and some of the stuff women would say on their pages , jezuz, the trash out there is pretty unbelievable but l'd be guessing some of the men were no better too, dunno, never looked any. l knida took that side of things as an advantage though actually bc your seeing into her head and thinking right there without even knowing her but if you'd met her out in the real world it might take 6mths before that side of her shows sooooo, she was doin the guys a favor. Edited March 31, 2020 by chillii Link to post Share on other sites
Author Backinthesaddleagain Posted March 31, 2020 Author Share Posted March 31, 2020 8 hours ago, chillii said: They were mostly a sewer back when and just as much for a guy as anyone else believe me if you were male op you'd see the crap they also deal with. Butttt, on mine there were also some great women among it all too, just people trying it thinking you never know maybe l meet the right person just like l was . Took like about 30 seconds training day one in spotting all the bs and a wk or so discovering and figuring out settings to best suit you but after that personally, apart from tits and g string'd women popping up all over the place in ads non stop - mine said if you use the paid version you don't get ads , doubt that though and l just stayed on the free one anyway , but it was ok , met some damn nice women once l got the hang of it. But yeah it was 2/3rds sewer on the rest - and some of the stuff women would say on their pages , jezuz, the trash out there is pretty unbelievable but l'd be guessing some of the men were no better too, dunno, never looked any. l knida took that side of things as an advantage though actually bc your seeing into her head and thinking right there without even knowing her but if you'd met her out in the real world it might take 6mths before that side of her shows sooooo, she was doin the guys a favor. I am a male lol Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted March 31, 2020 Share Posted March 31, 2020 10 hours ago, Trail Blazer said: Exactly. So many men especially, don't understand how much of a turn off it is for women to hear a man sook like a whiny b!tch. Yes. I'm a humanitarian empath recovering from a savior complex lol So in my 20s, I was often pulled in by the urge to help these poor befuddled men. Now that I've grown up some, I'll give them friendly advice, but my sexual attraction to whiny men is at absolute zero. My man is strong, rather stoic, and would never in a million years whine to a woman about his problems. That's hot 1 Link to post Share on other sites
scooby-philly Posted March 31, 2020 Share Posted March 31, 2020 On 3/10/2020 at 6:42 PM, Ruby Slippers said: lol I encountered a number of whiny men who complained about what a bad day they had within a few messages. Delete. Nobody needs a Debby Downer for a boyfriend/girlfriend. The women asking for a ride home is a scam - they're looking for suckers to either pay for a ride on Uber or they're looking to get paid on paypal, venmo, cash app, etc. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Trail Blazer Posted March 31, 2020 Share Posted March 31, 2020 On 3/12/2020 at 2:31 AM, max3732 said: All of a sudden I've noticed that nearly half the profiles on Tinder are fake, advertising some website or some crazy polygamist or whatever. I had to ask my friend what a "sugar baby" was since I started seeing all these profiles that mentioned it. When I do match with someone they always ask what I'm looking for. I would think it's obvious I want to date and see if we're compatible to get married and raise a family. Is that so hard to find these days? Unless you specifically state this in your profile, why would it be obvious to anyone else that your goal is purely to get married and start a family? Link to post Share on other sites
CAPSLOCK BANDIT Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 On 3/10/2020 at 6:22 PM, Gaeta said: Then you are not on a quality site and you're not paying a membership. I always paid a membership so I would not have to deal with those advertizing + I set my search on exactly what I wanted to see meaning single men looking for serious relationship, that way I didn't waste time scrolling through hundreds of men looking for fun. That $1 a day membership is worth it. I spent 3 times that on coffee per day, if you are serious about finding someone then get that membership. This. Sifting through the bulls*** is honestly a lot of effort and time... One thing I have noticed on Plenty of Fish specifically, on the Meet Me function, is that the REAL people that like you, they won't be visible to you, but the people soliciting sex, their profiles will be visible to you when they like you... Its ridiculous, it seems like they are allowing this to go on, maybe they are getting a kick-back or something, I don't know what to say. Link to post Share on other sites
max3732 Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 15 hours ago, Trail Blazer said: Unless you specifically state this in your profile, why would it be obvious to anyone else that your goal is purely to get married and start a family? Isn't that the whole point of dating? Link to post Share on other sites
SumGuy Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 1 hour ago, max3732 said: Isn't that the whole point of dating? Not at all...if you mean by point marriage and kids. Not everyone wants these things, and these are big life choices so good to have that up front. Also one should not assume the default is casual / FWB (another common refrain see on LS). No reason to not be upfront and honest about the kind of relationship one is looking for, be it casual, long term, marriage or kids. 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 2 hours ago, max3732 said: Isn't that the whole point of dating? I think if you are looking for marriage and kids you should be on match. I’ve never been on there, but it’s my understanding the paid sites are taken a little more seriously than Tinder 1 Link to post Share on other sites
max3732 Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 3 hours ago, Cookiesandough said: I think if you are looking for marriage and kids you should be on match. I’ve never been on there, but it’s my understanding the paid sites are taken a little more seriously than Tinder Well I'm on Match as well and have met a few people, but still not luck. I figured Tinder is free so might as well try it. I haven't met a single person IRL from Tinder. It's got such a huge % of fake profiles that I'm thinking that its not even worth my time anymore. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Trail Blazer Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 6 hours ago, max3732 said: Isn't that the whole point of dating? If that's what you believe then you've lived a very sheltered life. Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 (edited) 26 minutes ago, max3732 said: Well I'm on Match as well and have met a few people, but still not luck. I figured Tinder is free so might as well try it. I haven't met a single person IRL from Tinder. It's got such a huge % of fake profiles that I'm thinking that its not even worth my time anymore. I mean I’ve only met guys on tinder who wanted rship, but from what I hear that is an exception and many are there to hook up only. You’re more likely to get an STD or credit card info stolen than a wife from there . Edited April 1, 2020 by Cookiesandough Link to post Share on other sites
SincereOnlineGuy Posted April 1, 2020 Share Posted April 1, 2020 28 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said: I mean I’ve only met guys on tinder who wanted rship, but from what I hear that is an exception and many are there to hook up only. You’re more likely to get an STD or credit card info stolen than a wife from there . Tinder isn't "OLD"... Tinder is "OLF" 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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