Jump to content

Friend who disappeared wants to hang out again?


Recommended Posts

I had a friend I really liked and we used to hang out couple of times a long time ago. Then when I asked her to hang out again, she never replied to my message and she disappeared for couple of years. I mean, I'm sure she was where she always was, she just ghosted me I guess. 

I was hurt because I expected us to hang out as we seemed like good friends. At least it seemed like a beginning of a nice new friendship. 

All of the sudden she texted me now how she thinks about me a lot and asked me to hang out. She ignored my question why she ghosted me.

What should I do? Would you hang out with her again after all that happened? 

I mean, if she was a guy who I dated and did that to me, I would ignore him. But is it different when it comes to friendships? Should I give it a second chance?

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, ohso said:

Would you hang out with her again after all that happened? 

You don't say how well you know her, if you like her give her another chance and take it slow/don't expect too much?!

I have re-connected with people over the years but sometimes just to confirm the original 'friendship diagnosis' so to speak! But a couple of people I was close to it's been nice to talk to again here and there. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, ohso said:

I had a friend I really liked and we used to hang out couple of times a long time ago. Then when I asked her to hang out again, she never replied to my message and she disappeared for couple of years. I mean, I'm sure she was where she always was, she just ghosted me I guess. 

I was hurt because I expected us to hang out as we seemed like good friends. At least it seemed like a beginning of a nice new friendship. 

All of the sudden she texted me now how she thinks about me a lot and asked me to hang out. She ignored my question why she ghosted me.

What should I do? Would you hang out with her again after all that happened? 

I mean, if she was a guy who I dated and did that to me, I would ignore him. But is it different when it comes to friendships? Should I give it a second chance?

I say you agree to meet at a certain time and place. Then just don't show up and don't reply if she texts you where are you. Turn about is fair play. What she did to you is wrong and isn't worth it. 

  • Confused 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Up to you but be weary. Should you decide to give it another go, there's always the possibility she'll walk again. 

Link to post
Share on other sites

It's entirely up to you.  I certainly wouldn't go out of my way to see her but if you are bored & you want to see her, go ahead.  If you don't want to deal you can ghost her back now or tell her that she burned that bridge  then walk away.  

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 3/14/2020 at 1:11 PM, ohso said:

She ignored my question why she ghosted me.

She's still the same person, she hasn't changed. You could hang out with her, but be prepared for her to ghost you again. Do you really want to be friends with someone who treats you like that?

Link to post
Share on other sites

When friends ran hot and cold on me in the past, it was usually man related. Like either they just blew off most of their friends because they had a boyfriend or they had a boyfriend who was jealous and possessive and tried to keep them from friends. I even had one who I didn't see for a long time when she was with this guy and then when it got to be violent, she came and talked to me. But then when they got back together for a while she disappeared again. 

 

Alcoholics we'll also disappear from anyone who disapproves of their level of drinking. So they're going to be lots of reasons. It would be nice if she would just answer your question. 

 

I think I would meet with her and find out what she's been up to and let her know that you were really kind of taken aback when you just never heard from her again. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 1 month later...

If you want to hang out with her, then hang out with her.  I don't see what the big deal is.  Try being friends with her again and see how it goes.  If she starts exhibiting flaky or weird behavior, then don't waste your time with this friendship.  But maybe that won't happen.  Give it a chance.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, maybe she's matured some now and won't do that to you again.  I would ask her what happened back then, if she even remembers.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I would ignore her and go about my business.  It's great that now everyone is in lockdown she wants to hang out.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...