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Met someone great and now the world is shutting down.

planb1973

By planb1973,
in Coronavirus Disease (COVID-19) Pandemic

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planb1973

planb1973

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I had a great date with a woman last week. Within minutes I knew I would be wanting a second date. Apparently the feeling was quite mutual and a second date was scheduled a couple days later. This is the first woman in almost 2 years I have really been interested in. The second date was just fantastic!

For the 3rd date she wanted to make me dinner :)

And then the whole world went on lock down!

In the course of one day everything started closing and she lost her next 4 months of employment, and had to quickly move 3 hours away for a temporary position. 3rd dated had to be canceled. 

What to do now?

We have been talking a bit, but with all the uncertainty in the world dating seems unlikely for an undisclosed amount of time. 

 

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alphamale

alphamale

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just tell her that you two should slow it down a bit.  give  her some space.  but keep in touch

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Mrin

Mrin

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Dude tell me about it. I met a fantastic woman. She lives two states away. Came up to visit last week. Was freaking amazing. I was supposed to fly to see her this week. Instead I'm stuck in my house and sick (no fever yet - all the rest of the symptoms though). The governor has ordered people from my county to self isolate for 14 days and under no circumstances leave the county. Yeah...

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Ruby Slippers

Ruby Slippers

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Keep in touch. If it's meant to be it will work out and nothing can stop it.

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simpycurious

simpycurious

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46 minutes ago, Ruby Slippers said:

Keep in touch. If it's meant to be it will work out and nothing can stop it.

This is exactly RIGHT.  The world is not falling apart so stop already.   Don't lose contact with her and make it happen.  Stop looking for 

excuses on why it WON'T/Can't happen and focus on how it CAN happen.

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Fletch Lives

Fletch Lives

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Make her a friend or have phone dates. 

Unfortunately, since you might not see her for awhile, chances are she'll lose the crush.

That's okay - it was good practice dating for when you meet Mrs. Right.

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planb1973

planb1973

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I am going to keep in touch. We had both discussed on our dates to take things nice and slow, so maybe all this is just forcing that. I tend to jump in with both feet when I like someone. 


She is on the coast right now in an isolated area. I'm going to offer to drive down there for a walk on the beach.

Ive had bad luck with dating, or finding a long term partner for that matter, so this just feels like a slap in the face. I'm not going to give up trying.

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Ruby Slippers

Ruby Slippers

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1 hour ago, planb1973 said:

I'm going to offer to drive down there for a walk on the beach.

Great idea. Practical and romantic. I'd love this 👍

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Ruby Slippers

Ruby Slippers

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14 hours ago, Mrin said:

Instead I'm stuck in my house and sick (no fever yet - all the rest of the symptoms though). 

Wishing you a speedy recovery, @Mrin!

 

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2BGoodAgain

2BGoodAgain

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ummm... if you two truly like each other a lot... you'll find a way to make it work.

silliness... have you two no fortitude??? :)

you two will be fine. stop being a dramaqueen. i'm teasing, btw. :)

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simpycurious

simpycurious

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5 hours ago, Fletch Lives said:

Make her a friend or have phone dates. 

Unfortunately, since you might not see her for awhile, chances are she'll lose the crush.

That's okay - it was good practice dating for when you meet Mrs. Right.

What is a "phone date" exactly?

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2BGoodAgain

2BGoodAgain

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6 minutes ago, simpycurious said:

What is a "phone date" exactly?

if i had to hazard a guess... "chatting on the phone.. and possibly intimacy????". lol. i have NOT the foggiest clue.

 

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simpycurious

simpycurious

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2 hours ago, Fletch Lives said:

Chatting and flirting on the phone...... often for too long.

Is that like social distancing?  If so, then it's highly appropriate in today's CRAZY world

 

Back to the OP,  don't let anything deter you if you are really interested in this woman.  

Edited by simpycurious
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Versacehottie

Versacehottie

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19 hours ago, simpycurious said:

This is exactly RIGHT.  The world is not falling apart so stop already.   Don't lose contact with her and make it happen.  Stop looking for 

excuses on why it WON'T/Can't happen and focus on how it CAN happen.

I agree with this.  If you look at the positives, you can find out a lot about each other and are in very similar situations due to what the world is going through and possibly would bond over things related to that.  I think that if anything the shut down of so many things gives people a chance to talk about a ton of stuff that maybe otherwise wouldn't come up.  At least if you are talking about something that seems boring over text or on phone or FaceTime, there is a reason for it.  I think good relationships get stronger through challenges and bad ones implode.  I don't think it matters too much how long you've been dating--just take it from where you are and what's in line with that pace & position.

The other good news is that the chances she will be going out and meeting other guys or setting up dates with them is little to none.  So competition is low because of the situation.  You just need to be creative in how you keep the momentum going.  Good luck and Mrin hope you are ok :)

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Mystery4u

Mystery4u

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Count yourself lucky she is only 3 hours away and you can drive to see her!

A month ago I met a woman on whilst on holiday a 14 hour flight away.... The connection and attraction was instant, we spent the next 7 days together, 24 hours a day, as though we were in a relationship for years! I've had a lot of experience with girls and girlfriends but this one felt completely different and 'right'. Asked her to be my girlfriend before I left to go back home.

Was planning to go see her again in May... but I can't even book the ticket cos of everything happening.

Still we video call for at least an hour twice a day, every day, getting to know each other. Distance or the virus definitely not stopping us. 😎

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Fletch Lives

Fletch Lives

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15 hours ago, simpycurious said:

Is that like social distancing?  If so, then it's highly appropriate in today's CRAZY world

- yup.

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2BGoodAgain

2BGoodAgain

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17 hours ago, simpycurious said:

Is that like social distancing?  If so, then it's highly appropriate in today's CRAZY world

 

Back to the OP,  don't let anything deter you if you are really interested in this woman.  

when you think about it... phone intimacy is all the benefits of the mind/heart...without the messiness of the physical. having said that, after a while, you crave the physical. so... yeah. :)

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planb1973

planb1973

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Update,

We have been talking on the phone most days. She is in a good place at the coast, but may have been exposed to the virus. This was right after she had told me she wanted me to come visit, currently she is quarantining herself. I have taken to daily messages in the morning sharing my photography and feel good messages. She in turn has taken to referring to me as darling. 

I don't think I will get a chance to see her for a few weeks. One challenge I have is flirting, Since I hardly know her and we only got a chance to make out once before people went on lock down. I'm am not the best flirt until things have started escalating physically. 

It is obvious she is still interested. I guess I'll just work on my courtship skills over my dating skills. 

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Ruby Slippers

Ruby Slippers

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I think the lack of insta-affection is going to be good for daters, help them develop the mind and heart aspects of dating over the physical :)

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mortensorchid

mortensorchid

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I read somewhere that some are trying to have video chats with each other so they feel like they are together when they actually aren't able to be together thanks to the social distancing.  Try that, arrange a time when you'll be together on a video chat, and you'll have a date date.  Or suggest it anyway. 

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simpycurious

simpycurious

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7 hours ago, mortensorchid said:

I read somewhere that some are trying to have video chats with each other so they feel like they are together when they actually aren't able to be together thanks to the social distancing.  Try that, arrange a time when you'll be together on a video chat, and you'll have a date date.  Or suggest it anyway. 

That sounds SOOOOOOOOOOO romantic.  A sign of the times perhaps

So, I guess and wonderful dinner and some dancing are out of the question?

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Miss Spider

Miss Spider

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What if you’re talking to someone a long time and you meet a long time later but is no chemistry in person? 😟

Edited by Cookiesandough
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