OCD

[JCDallas]

Hey everyone. So I had my first professional therapy session this morning, and one of the biggest takeaways was I have OCD, and I had a question that I wonder if anyone here can help out with. I think I have Obsessive Thinking about almost everything, but lately a lot of my obsessive thinking has been about my sexual orientation & relationships in general. I'm absolutely positive I'm 100% straight, I'm only attracted to women, only will be attracted to women, I want a relationship, a girlfriend that leads to engagement, a wife and kids, definitely, you couldn't offer me anything in the world that would change that. I've been thinking nonstop about what ifs, and just these crazy unwanted thoughts that won't go away. This only started recently, and I don't know where it came from. These are just thoughts, and I'd never in a million years act on these thoughts, because it's not who I am as a person. It's just these what if thoughts won't go away. I have another therapy session next Friday. Any advice here?

Edited March 21, 2020 by JCDallas

[preraph]

Well, that's for the therapist, I'm afraid.  For one thing, you didn't say what your thoughts are but just reiterated you know you're straight.  Anyway, it's something to let the therapist know about.  Don't worry about it. It's not the end of the world if you have some mixed feelings on gender.  I mean, we all fall on a sliding scale, M to F and there's everyone in between to different degrees.  Just because you have a thought doesn't mean you're changing radically or anything.  

[JCDallas]

Thank you for the reply! I think what this is, is, HOCD, which I didn't know even existed until about 45 minutes ago. I guess I just need to figure out a way to manage it/fix it completely. Hopefully my therapist can help with this. I guess I'm just trying to find a way to get my mind off it until my next appointment..

Edited March 21, 2020 by JCDallas

[preraph]

I can understand you'd be anxious until the time comes.  Maybe you need to go more often here for a couple weeks if possible.  I imagine talking it out will help over time.  Just remember, the worst case scenario still isn't even a BAD thing, right?  It's not the end of the world.  Just don't get in a hurry to "decide" and just let it flow without fear.  Nothing bad can come of this, really.  It's just anxiety-making.  Get busy doing active things.

[JCDallas]

Yes, exactly. I watched a few videos about this, to try and see if anything would help. I found one that said to treat it the same way as if you wouldn't like a certain food, and not fight it/constantly think about it. So I'm going to try that. For the last week+ It's pretty much been all I thought about. So far in the last 20 minutes, that has made me feel slightly better, but I know it's only temporary. 

Edited March 21, 2020 by JCDallas

[LuckyM]

Get a book called Stop obsessing. It has some helpful ideas.  Sometimes people get obsessed with irrational thoughts without control over them.  Don't worry and also don't fight the thoughts. That makes them stronger. Concentrate on something that holds your attention like a puzzle

Edited March 25, 2020 by LuckyM
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[DJMarky]

I have OCD and have had it all my adult life. I take medication (Clomipramine) for it and meditate. The average person has ~70,000 thoughts a day, most are useless. Remember they are just thoughts and don't define you. Thoughts are meaningless. I just looked at my balcony then and thought hey what would happen if I jumped off it, how would I die? Am I going to do it? No. It is just a thought.

Peace.

[DJMarky]

When I had my first OCD thought I was like WTF. I thought about hitting my girlfriend (at the time) with a car. Messed up. I threw up and was so nauseous afterwards. I thought I must be turning into a psychopath. That was a long time ago. Thoughts are meaningless. Everybody, and I mean everybody, has these type of thoughts. The difference? Most people just dismiss it. The problem with OCD is that it causes anxiety. Our brain naturally thinks about things that cause anxiety. Have a job interview tomorrow? Well prepare to have a sleepless night cause you will be obsessing over it the night before (as an example). The brain attaches onto any thought that it considers important. The more anxiety/weight you give to the thought the more important it becomes. It is our instinct. If we didnt have this mechanism then we would have died out long ago as we would have been killed instead of worrying about protecting ourselves from sabre tooth tigers etc.